I don't think I can take any more ): please advise me.

[sosickandtired]

I don't know if this is the correct topic but it's the one I usually read.

I am having an awful time at the moment, I have 2 DC ages 11 and 7. The 11 y.o has a different dad and the 7 y.o dad and I have not a very good relationship, to say the least. He has never wanted to live together and just picks and chooses, I think it's selfish and for a quite a while we've been on the verge of splitting. Stupidly we had sex twice over New Year and since i'm off my pill I took the morning after pill both times. But on 25th Jan i found out I'm pregnant. I was all over the place, but after a few days of tears and guilt and horrible feelings since I feel I love the baby already, I decided on a termination, because of many many reasons practical, financial etc, there's no way I could go through with this pregnancy realistically.

Since around the 1st Feb I've been having horrendous all day sickness. I had similar with my first I remember although not as bad as this. Back then I lost a ton of weight, lost teeth, was sick a lot all the way through, really anaemic. This is worse. worse )-: . I can keep literally NOTHING down apart from maybe a few digestive biscuits a day (none today) and I've been averaging a pint of sipped fluids a day and at least keeping that down (again, not today, today EVERYTHING has been coming up). I've lost count of how many times I vomit or retch - probably about 20 x a day. I'm only peeing a small amount twice a day or so and the other thing barely at all (sorry if TMI). I can barely sleep as I'm up about 3-4 times in the night most nights being sick. Have lost about a stone in 10 days )-: and was only 8st to begin with. Every time the sickness comes the cold sweats and shaking and dizziness.

I feel so weak. "D"P has done nothing to help at all. He's not even working and lives 5 mins away but I've been dragging myself the 2 hours a day walk to and from school with kids, housework (eldest been helping), cooking (boak!), everything, being sick in the street and in shops etc. He just says "I know" when I say he's not lifted a finger. My dad is coming over tonight cause I couldn't face an extra walk to the bank, but I've not told anyone in my family it's anything other than a bug and they live an hour or so away anyway.

I have the first appointment tomorrow for the termination, but I've been told they won't do anything on that day, I'll need to wait for another appointment (have been waiting since 2nd feb for this appointment). "D"P is picking up the DC whilst I go.

I don't know what I'm asking really, I just feel like I cannot go on like this, I'm so weak from not eating and even when not actually being sick, the awful nausea just builds and builds 24/7. I feel like I can't cope anymore )-; , and I'm no wuss but I've never felt as ill in my life. I feel like the sickness is overtaking everything, even my emotions about the termination etc, I just can't focus on anything other than getting through the days and I'm starting to get panic attacks as well and worry HOW ON EARTH WILL I COPE IF THEY SAY ANOTHER 7 OR 10 DAY WAIT. I feel so stupid and let down by the father. I wonder if I'll ever get over this.

Sorry I'm feeling really sorry for myself and rough I even have red spots round my eyes from pressure. If anyone has any advice or support to give it would be welcome, or even just support to get through this. Feel so alone.

[HumphreyCobblers]

Go to the pregnancy sickness support site, there is a list of effective medication. Cyclizine did not work for me but the next one in line did. Don't let them fob you off, the doctor I phoned said "well, there is nothing else to give you!" and I had to read the list out to her. I am not usually so assertive, but it really made me cross that I was expected just to put up with this when there are treatments out there.

[LaceyLee]

Glad you are feeling slightly better and that they are being helpful. It's a horrible situation to be in. Is your do helping out yet?

[sosickandtired]

Thanks everyone for the support. x

I'm taking the cyclizine tablets as prescribed, I think they are helping somewhat, maybe cutting the vomiting episodes by about 1/3 and not really helping the general nausea "feeling" at all , it's better than nothing but I was hoping they'd be a miracle cure!

Still feeling grim, and have a horrible taste in my mouth and FAR too much saliva (which I have now found is another symptom of severe sickness). Soooo thirsty but can only really sip - when really I want to down 2 pints of water in one sitting! Did manage some broken sleep last night though.

I'm very relieved at how quickly they managed to get me seen though. I really don't think I would have coped if they'd said longer than a couple days, it's unbearable. I am looking forward to not feeling this awful sickness, but then again I'm aware of the emotional side and i will probably 'crash' after the procedure and feel awful about terminating. It's a catch 22.

Oh from the dating scan, the only time I could have conceived was when I had actually taken the Morning After Pill and it was 48 hours after the intercourse. So - DO NOT rely on the Morning After Pill effectiveness!!!

[PeppasNanna]

How are you feeling today Op?
for you... x

[HumphreyCobblers]

You poor thing. I am glad you have some pills to help now. I hope you get through the whole process as easily as possible and your sickness stops.

Your DP is a complete arse, I would carry on hating him if I were you. How dare he be so callous and unhelpful.

[Sammythewondercat]

That's good news and you will hopefully feel a lot better soon. There's no way I could have coped with the sickness without support (I remember reading about how women used to die of hyperemesis in the past - think one of the Bronte sisters did - and when you feel that bad you can understand why!).
I had a termination many years ago - when my eldest was only 2 and my marriage was breaking down (husband went off with someone else) - it does hurt and I felt really guilty but at the time I had my son to think about and it would have been even more of a struggle as I had to find work (we had no money), childcare, somewhere to live .... and I was struggling with sickness - which came to an abrupt end straight after the op. The relief was amazing initially but obviously also sadness and guilt - but it was the right thing to do at the time (and that's all any of us can ever do).
Thinking of you x

[Valentine2]

Wanted to write that fill it with a word for this bloody DP of yours.

[Valentine2]

That's a ....... for sure! Fill here a choice word you feel like right at the moment OP because what I want to write is not going to pass mumsnet standards.
Here is a hug. Holding hands with you. Just go to a&e and ask for anti sickness ! They should be able to help you I am sure. I am on the other corner of the country. Wish I could help. Xxx

[RandomMess]

Glad it went well, very tough decision to have to make

Please come back for support whenever especially when it comes to binning the "P"

[Bringiton2016]

I'm so relieved for you. I'm glad they were nice and you've got a prescription. Not long to wait now, then you can move on with your life. You're very brave

[hellsbellsmelons]

It can't be an easy decision that's for sure.
I've never been in this situation so I honestly can't imagine what it must be like.
But you need to do what is best for you right now.
Hopefully the prescription will help with the sickness.
I wish you well.

[sosickandtired]

So I'm back frm the clinic. They were really great, they could see how sick I am and they did struggle to get a vein for blood tests a consultant had to come and do it. I did see the baby on the scan )-: the lady said 1 cm .

I've opted for a medical termination as they said they could get me in on Saturday and Monday for that procedure, rather than the surgical , which would take 1.5 weeks maybe more of waiting time. Also the doctor insisted on calling my GP surgery and getting me a prescription of 5 days cyclizine (sp?) for the sickness,so I've picked that up and going to start it soon, hopefully have a better evening and night than last night.

I'm relieved that it will be over soon, and I can't wait to not be so sick, but I do have mixed emotions about the pregnancy, I do feel sadness and loss and I think it will be worse when I actually go in, but I do feel it's the right decision x

[Bringiton2016]

Good luck x

[sosickandtired]

Thanks hellsbellsmelons x

I am having that strange thing where one day I crave something and then the next i can't even look at it or think about that food without feeling extremely sick! What I can eat has been changing all the time. I was eating dry crackers but as I got more thirsty I can't stand the thought of them. One night I had 2 spoons of curry (bad idea I know) and promptly sicked it up 4 times! Bought cuppa soups but couldn't face them when it came to it. Same with chips and gravy. Now I am on the digestive biscuits (only a couple a day atm) and lucozade, but funny you mention that, the whole time I've really wanted those fruit pastille icelollies... but I'm struggling to get the energy for shops and my dad didn't bring them. If I can I will get them.

I know, it is severe sickness. I was about half as bad as this with my first (DD) , but with my second (DS) I was only sick the "normal" pregnancy sickness amount.

Going in the bath and got appointment at 1pm, I'm going to beg them to move quickly cause I weighed myself and have lost 10lbs in 10 days, if it keeps up at this rate I'll weigh less than 11 y.o DD by the next 10 days. And I'm just feeling so shit with it and the complete lack of support from so-called "P" - He agreed earlier in the week to pick up the DC whilst I'm there, but is now moaning about it, saying "your appointment is at 1, you'll be in and out in half an hour surely?" , how cold. Also asking me why the DC can't just go to afterschool care And he is moaning that he'll have to "wander the streets or go to the library" for ages, when that's bullshit, he could easily take them to my house (he has key) , or his own house! He just won't lift a finger. I'm starting to hate him.

Fingers crossed the clinic will take me seriously and thanks for all the support when I feel so alone x

[hellsbellsmelons]

I was sick a lot and couldn't keep anything down but I was nothing like you sound.
I hope your appointment gets this all sorted out quickly for you.
Just FYI, orange ice lollies were my saviour (and sugary tea)
The shop bought ones not so good but I made my own at home and they were something I could keep down.
Might not help you but worth a try?

[sosickandtired]

Thanks

"I used to crawl to the bathroom to vomit during the night - only bile came up as I couldn't keep anything down and I was too weak to walk"

I am almost at the above stage, except from the crawling.

Called the GP surgery but they could only give me times which clash with the termination appointment )-:

Was up and down all night, finally 2 hours sleep at 4 am. I kept being able to feel my heart in my chest - sometimes quick (when moving or vomiting), sometimes slow when resting. eek.
I am going to deal with this today though, one way or another, because I am really struggling to cope and another 10 days or even a week like this would be torture.

Kept down a little lucozade and water so far. Going to take DC to school and come back and try a bath and book a taxi to my appointment. x

[Sammythewondercat]

I was horribly sick with all my 3 pregnancies - the first 2 were boys and my 3rd was a girl. With her I was so bad I was hospitalised 3 times on a drip & didn't think I would make it! Apparently women used to die of hyperemesis which anyone who's had it will completely believe - it was 18 years ago for me & I still remember the misery ..... I used to crawl to the bathroom to vomit during the night - only bile came up as I couldn't keep anything down and I was too weak to walk ....
At the time I was told it was something to do with hormones and that's why you can be more affected with a girl but to be honest I don't know if there's any truth in it.
Take care of yourself - do try to at least drink as really easy to be dehydrated - I was told if I went more than 24 hours keeping nothing down then to go to hospital - at least you will be instantly better the minute the pregnancy is over x

[Curlywurly4]

You poor thing. Don't feel bad. It's important for you to be healthy and well regardless of your decision with the pregnancy.

I would try the out of hours GP and ask them to fax a prescription for anti sickness to the local pharmacy if A&E isn't an option. Do you have someone to collect it for you? Only thing is you may not be able to keep it down.

It will be fine to take a urine sample in, especially if it's from that morning. You can get a pot from the pharmacy if someone goes.

[RandomMess]

I really don't think your body can wait 10 days, it sounds like you could be very dehydrated and make need a saline drip etc.

[sosickandtired]

Sorry meant to say he doesn't know anything about the sickness cause it had only just started up the last time I saw him and didn't say anything. I feel really guilty asking for help when I'm not even keeping the baby, feel a bit of a fraud )-: but I'm so weak. Just tried a biscuit and a small amount lucozade.

[sosickandtired]

Thanks x

The GP is who I went to twice already - once when I found out and once to book the termination. He doesn't know anything about the sickness situation , but he did say if I needed to see him again , to ring and tell them he said I could have a same-day appointment. So that's something. I'll collect a sample in the morning and since the DC school is right beside the GP, i'll take it in. Cause I really won't be able to pee on demand ..

[Bringiton2016]

You poor thing. Please ring 101. You need to be seen by someone. Don't keep suffering alone.

[Twinklestein]

No it has to be fresh.

The fact that you can't pee much suggests you could well be dehydrated. Can you get an energency appt tomorrow morning with a GP? Ours you had to ring at 8.30am.

Alternatively just turn up and ask if you do a urine sample there and then, if a nurse could put a test stick in it.

[sosickandtired]

I'd really struggle to give a urine sample at any time of day at the mo, and I'm usually a racehorse pee-er ! Since this began I've been peeing only twice a day, in the morning and about 6pm and that's it. Do you think I can take a sample myself in the morning and store it, or will that skew the result?

[sosickandtired]

Thank you, I feel so so embarrassed going anywhere in this state but you are all right, I can't go on like this. I'm so ill with it. I will wait til my dad gets back, put kids to bed and try some water. If it comes back up again, I will call 101. x