Father/children relationship

[margaritadrakeina]

If your DH told you that your children were entirely your responsibility because you are a SAHM and he is the one who works, what would you say/think?

[LadyInDisguise]

Yuck! I wouldn't want any of these men in life tbh.

[Numberlock]

No and I can't imagine you'd enjoy working with them much either...

[lynniep]

I would say you married a twt. Children are the responsibility of both parents. You are both full time parents. happens to work outside the home in 'office hours' You work inside the home. He is earning money by working outside the home. You are saving the familiy childcare fees by doing working inside the home. Outside of 'office hours' is family time and attention is required from both parents. A man who takes no responsibility for his children is not a father. He is a dck.

[Numberlock]

He is earning money by working outside the home. You are saving the familiy childcare fees by doing working inside the home

... as well as enabling him to work uninhibited by not having to do any childcare during working hours (eg childminder pick-ups, school drop-offs, football training, dentist etc etc) which would be the case if both parents worked.

[theduchesse]

He does so little for the kids you had to include that he says hello to them in your list of their interactions. That is not normal. Most dads want to spend time with their kids.

[KatieScarlett2833]

I would have said...
No, just LTB, far quicker. What an arse.

[Snog]

I suggest you need to get a full time job then clearly everything should be split 50/50 in terms of housework and childcare.
If your dh won't pull his weight then consider why you would want to stay with him quite carefully

[Mrsdarcyiwish10]

I feel for you, my dh is on his last chance of many with me to change, he ignores the dc, criticise's them, doesn't do anything with them, his hobbies come first always, dc are upset by this, I am seriously reconsidering my marriage and so should you be, I hate to see my children upset by indifference.

[WickedBadZoot]

Zombie thread. Mrs I suggest you start your own thread for advice

[Mrsdarcyiwish10]

Probably should, just wanted to say there are others going through the same thing.

[corythatwas]

margaritadrakeina Sun 12-May-13 20:13:05
"If your DH told you that your children were entirely your responsibility because you are a SAHM and he is the one who works, what would you say/think"

If my dh said that, I'd make him a doctor's appointment, as it would be totally out of character. I'd be thinking Alzheimer's...

Other possible reactions:

what does he think happens to children who have to working parents- are they nobody's responsibility?

what is he going to tell them when they grow up and tell him they don't feel they really know him- that getting to know them as people was less important to him than making a point to you about SAHM?

My dh works a fulltime job and has a 5 hour commute on top of that: he still manages to find enough time to interact with his children.

[Myusernameismyusername]

I think I would feel like have provided an heir and a spare to a man who wanted the kudos of a family life but from afar, to not actually join in and enjoy it. I would worry about his bond with them growing up and if he is emotionally detached from them and how that would affect them. I would also feel like a baby machine or some kind of house servant. Maybe he allowed me to have them to give me something to 'occupy' me so he could be free to enjoy his own free time. I mean without the kids tying you to the home of an evening and weekend you might get a life of your own or want to do things together

I would feel sad

[LiviaDrusillaAugusta]

ZOMBIE THREAD

Start your own thread if you want advice - this one is three years old FFS

[Myusernameismyusername]

I didn't check the date!

[OurBlanche]

OP was 3.5 YEARS ago ZOMBIE THREAD!