Talk

Flip

Parenting a preteen can be a minefield. Find support here.

Preteens

Does she need a bra?

10 replies

rollonretirementfgs · 15/04/2024 11:23

My DD is 11. A very young 11 but starting to develop physically. She is starting to develop little boobs and they are showing when she wears a tshirt. I've bought her some little crop tops but she refuses to wear them and gets upset that she doesn't want to. What age should I insist she wears them?

OP posts:

Report

noonesayscheese · 15/04/2024 11:39

Following for the same advice. My daughter is 12, starting to 'bud' and hates the 'cropped vest' tops.

Report

NewJob20241 · 15/04/2024 11:42

rollonretirementfgs · 15/04/2024 11:23

I don't think there's any age you can 'insist' she wears them, it's her body.

All you can do is explain that her body will change, that she may feel more comfortable wearing different underwear when it does and you're happy to get her whatever she'll need.

Report

VladsPants · 15/04/2024 11:44

You can never insist. Bras aren't compulsory at any age.

Report

rollonretirementfgs · 15/04/2024 15:05

VladsPants · 15/04/2024 11:44

You can never insist. Bras aren't compulsory at any age.

I can insist if she is wearing a white shirt to school and you can see her nipples through it!

OP posts:

Report

Knackeredhamster · 15/04/2024 15:13

Then I'd buy some white thin strapped vests or cotton cami type thing.

It's the elasticated bit on vest tops that sends them over the edge.

Report

Secondstart1001 · 15/04/2024 15:14

I agree with you…. Maybe sit her down and tell her why she needs to wear a crop top. I had this issue with DD1, DD2 no issues she wore them as soon as needed. I do have issue with kids nipples showing, it can create unnecessary attention. DSD aged 8 and needs to wear but her mum oblivious to it and it’s not my place… DSD too innocent to be conscious of her body but as mums we are well placed to try and advise, educate and support our Dds.

Report

HummingbirdChandelier · 15/04/2024 15:16

I’d insist now. Crop tops or actual bras.

Report

Username2101 · 15/04/2024 15:17

I had the same issue with my DD and she's only 10.
I treat it as a special mum and daughter day and took her out, just us, to buy a bra she liked. She hates wearing it, but is very self conscious of her body.

Report

Mumaway · 15/04/2024 15:20

Similar here. We resolved it by going for her to choose herself. She quite likes the bralet ones from Primark, hates the sports-bra x-backed one. She understood after a conversation about the quality of fabric and boobs showing through. We made quite a joke of it (including of course me showing my nips through the fabric)