Failed by midwife?

[Shannoncn7]

I'm 39 weeks pregnant with my second baby and have been pushing for vbac birth. My midwife has assured me all the way that this is a low risk pregnancy and should be fine, however she measured me yesterday and said my baby hadn't grown since last app. She booked me a scan at the hospital for today.
Today they scanned me and baby is nearly 3lb heavier than she had estimated and now they want me to have a c section again.
I had multiple issues with my first pregnancy, placenta previa, diabetes and another big baby at 10lb. Placenta moved last minute had 4 failed inductions then emergency c section, midwife knew all of this... How has she gotten it soo wrong?

I've refused the c section and asked to be induced instead, doctor has said we can try but chances are the c section will be necessary... I just don't know what to do now. So upset and angry. Has anyone been through something similar?

[DGFB]

Can’t believe you’re not accepting the caesarean. I get so cross that people would put their babies at risk like this.

[Tiredmum100]

How do you feel the midwife has failed you?

[Mummyme87]

I’m
A midwife, had a crash CS at 9cm last time following induction, needed blood transfusion, had infection, baby in NNu with meningitis., he was 10lb 5.
Was induced 2nd time for likely late onset diabetes, big baby etc, had normal birth, 2.5L blood loss, 3B year and 10lb baby. I was happy with my decision and would VBAC again.

On your comment blaming the midwife, you’re talking crap

[iwannabelikeyouhoohoo]

Your midwife hasn’t failed you. It sounds as through she’s done a great job, tbh.

I’d have loved a VBAC but the safest thing for my son was an ELCS after his sister was an EMCS, and his needs came over my desires. I hope you make the sensible decision here.

[Hercisback]

You haven't been failed, she's done her job perfectly. She's spotted something, referred you on and then a course of action has been given to you.

I'd take an ELCS over a failed induction and EMCS. I've done both and ELCS was a breeze in comparison. The elective section is much less stressed or rushed and has a lot better chance of a good outcome for you both.

[EarringsandLipstick]

The key thing here is your history, which makes a successful VBAC challenging.

I can't see how your midwife has failed you at all. She has supported your wishes throughout, but referred you for a scan when she had some concerns.

Both her calculations, and those derived from the scan, are estimates.

I'm not sure about the conversations you had about a low-risk pregnancy. The pregnancy was probably indeed low-risk, the delivery less so. If your midwife knew your history, she also would have known the odds for a VBAC. I wonder if you were a bit selective in what you heard?

[HappyMeal564]

Pushing big babies can really damage you. I speak from experience. Go with what they are advising, they don't offer a section unless they think its necessary

[CarryOnNurse20]

Your midwife hasn’t failed you. If I were you I’d have the c-section. No doubt if a VBAC goes wrong it will be a healthcare professionals fault in your eyes. It’s not you vs them. You’re a team to deliver a healthy baby. Honestly a vaginal birth is not the be all and end all and certainly not worth any significant risk.

[MrsJVJ]

Gosh your poor midwife. I'm failing to see anything at all that she has done wrong?

[ny20005]

I can't believe any medical professional would think induction is a good idea after CS

You will be putting yourself & baby at huge risk & that's before big baby !

Subsequent babies tend to be bigger & Shoulder dystopia is a huge risk.

Listen to medical professionals!!

[VaccineSticker]

The fact they offered a csection means it’s serious. It’s not a decision they take lightly.
I’d Take the offer if I were you. X

[Northernlurker]

I don't understand how the midwife could have acted differently. I understand this is really disappointing for you however.

[Theunamedcat]

They thought my daughter was big turns out she was just over 6lb I was just fat 🙄

Midwife to my friend she was having an 8lb baby (after she had 10/11lb babies previously) baby was nearly 13lb

Tape measure and scans have been known to be wrong

[Jent13c]

Is there a particular reason you are so keen on the VBAC? Did you have any ongoing issues from the first EMCS?

I understand the want to deliver vaginally and I'm thankful I have twice but it certainly hasn't been without issues. The first time I had a third degree tear which isn't all that common but means that as soon as baby and placenta are out they separate you while you go away to theatre to get a spinal block and stiched back up. I'm very thankful they did a good job but in the process I have joined a sever birth tear support group and there are so many mums there who are living with constant horrific issues (ongoing pain/no sensation so no ability to enjoy sex/urinary and faecal incontinence). It was a very very hard decision for me to delivery my second vaginally as you are more at risk for severe tearing and any further damage can cause the above issues. Knowing this has changed my whole view on how I would approach birth in future and I certainly wouldn't discount having a planned, calm cesarean where I could be with my child throughout the whole process. Just wanted to offer a slightly different perspective, not just from a safety perspective but minimising ongoing issues point of view.

[Lindy2]

It sounds like your midwife has done everything she is supposed to. It's not her fault your measurements differ from the scan information.

My first baby was a very difficult birth. My second was a planned C Section. The C Section was a calm and safe experience. I felt very well afterwards - not exhausted and battered like I had done with my first.

I would encourage you to think a bit more about how hard a failed induction and then an emergency section would be in both you and baby. If you are likely to need a C Section it is a lot better and easier to recover from if it is preplanned.

[mamamalt]

Some of the comments here are terrible. Why does the OP sound ridiculous?! 😐why can't people just be nice as it's obviously a stressful situation.
OP I do agree there is nothing your midwife could have done differently but I would say if you feel strongly about not having the section please don't feel pressured into it. There are lots of Facebook groups that give really good advice and guidance on different birth situations and the rights you have which may be useful to help you get a balanced view. Obviously most important thing is both you and baby happy and healthy, but a big baby doesn't always mean a section. Both mine were over 9.8 and 9.9.
Good luck 👍

[Greygreenblue]

I get being disappointed to not be able to do a vbac, I really do. But I don’t see how this is your midwifes fault. At all.

Also, having been through one emergency c-section and one planned c-section, I think you would be completely mad to try for an induced vbac when the experts are already telling you it is highly likely you will need a c-section. A planned section is so much easier to recover from. And syntocin is awful.

[Peacefulspirit]

I agree wholeheartedly with @Mumto3thatsme I’d wait and see if I laboured spontaneously, I’d agree a cut off date and have the elective LSCS then.
I absolutely cannot understand why you feel your midwife has failed you, that pretty strong language and really sad given that she’s clearly supported your decision to have a VBAC and referred you for a scan at the appropriate time.

[Shannoncn7]

I feel failed because
I have had to remind my midwife multiple times that I had a c section previously including at yesterday's appointment!

She has not informed me of the different way previous c section women have to be induced (balloon)

She has continually said this is a low risk pregnancy and we are treating this baby as of my first????

She said she is happy to wait 2 weeks past my due date, only for my doctor to tell me they would never let me go over because of previous complications.

The above are why I feel failed by my midwife, the rug has been pulled from under my feet today and I don't feel supported. I don't feel like o was fully informed of all possibilities and this is where she has failed me. I came here looking for support and understanding and maybe find someone who had been through something similar. Not to to be told I am a fool or taking risks with my baby, with the information I have been told for the past 39 weeks, there wasn't a risk. This was all backed by my midwife. Thanks for understanding and turning on a concerned mother who is clearly upset. Women at their finest.

[Shannoncn7]

Thank you I appreciate a different view, I would have preferred natural obviously but not at the detriment of my baby's health or mine. I have a toddler at home too, I was hoping to have less recovery time so I could keep up with them both. We don't have support, just me and my partner. I know for most women the recovery time is less than with a c section. Now it looks as though I will be having a c section, I spent over a week in hospital being induced before even holding my baby, with a toddler at home I can't do that. Need to just get home with my babies and crack on. Thank you for sharing your experience and understanding

[Dottiex]

@Shannoncn7

Thank you I appreciate a different view, I would have preferred natural obviously but not at the detriment of my baby's health or mine. I have a toddler at home too, I was hoping to have less recovery time so I could keep up with them both. We don't have support, just me and my partner. I know for most women the recovery time is less than with a c section. Now it looks as though I will be having a c section, I spent over a week in hospital being induced before even holding my baby, with a toddler at home I can't do that. Need to just get home with my babies and crack on. Thank you for sharing your experience and understanding

If it helps ease your worries OP, I had an planned section and my recovery time was fine, I kept on top of my pain killers and in about a couple of days I was fine to do most of my activities however I didn't have a toddler to look after but a lot of women seem to agree that an elcs is easier to recover from than a emergency one.

I'm sorry you feel failed by your midwife, I can appreciate how disappointed you are hopefully you can move on from this and enjoy your new born x

[Shannoncn7]

@Mumto3thatsme

Hi,
There’s a lot going on here isn’t there.
Just going back to your first baby and that birth, it all sounds very complicated and confusing. I’ll try to clear a few things up so moving forward you understand the process more.
With your placenta previa, the placenta was very close to or covering the cervix. As the uterus stretches the placenta stretches and grows with it usually leaving enough safe space by the cervix to contemplate natural,childbirth.
You said you had diabetes, with diabetes comes the risk of a larger baby (I assume you had all the necessary tests this pregnancy to rule out diabetes again?)
Induction is an ongoing process, you’re not generally induced a numbe4 of times, you might have multiple pessarys for example but they wouldn’t be classed as individual inductions.

Anyway, so it’s been picked up that in your current pregnancy your baby is measuring larger then average according to scan
You’ve had a previous c-section following an 8mduction that didn’t progress.
Can I ask how far into pregnancy you was and how if you dilated at all?

I think in your shoes (with the information you’ve given so far) I’d decline induction hoping to labour spontaneously but if this hadn’t happened by 41 weeks opt for elective c-section.
Electives are usually a much better experience then the emergency you would have had, as disappointing as it may be there’s a time and a place to consider and opt for them

Good luck with deciding which route to take

Placenta was completely covering and literally moved when I was 39 weeks. Had a sweep that day then was booked in to be induced. 4 failed inductions are the terms my doctors have used when recounting that pregnancy and I only dilated half a centimetre, tried to break my water but couldn't get in. This pregnancy has been very different from go, very healthy my issue with my midwife is on another post here. The way she has spoken to me throughout this pregnancy now seems almost delusional. In the beginning I was anxious to even say I wanted a natural delivery because I thought it would be very unlikely however she has told me throughout there is nothing to worry about. "I'm low risk" ... Now looking back I'm very angry, she was my main support and supplier of information and I feel lied to.

[0DimSumMum0]

I had a complicated first birth which resulted in an emergency c section also. For the second I opted for an elective. It was such a different experience from the first. I think you will end up with many regrets it you end up with another emergency.

[Shannoncn7]

@CarryOnNurse20

Your midwife hasn’t failed you. If I were you I’d have the c-section. No doubt if a VBAC goes wrong it will be a healthcare professionals fault in your eyes. It’s not you vs them. You’re a team to deliver a healthy baby. Honestly a vaginal birth is not the be all and end all and certainly not worth any significant risk.

Please read my other posts and don't make assumptions that I blame all of my healthcare professionals for any issue that arises during pregnancy and labour as it is to be expected. However I am upset with my midwife because At 39 weeks I should be prepared or atleast informed of all potential outcomes and intricacies. Instead all this information has been sprung on me today. How was I supposed to make an informed decision without being fully informed?