Reducing Stillbirth: Count the Kicks Campaign

[CarGirl]

I just want to promote "Count The Kicks"

Please read this, if it helps one Mum not suffer the agony of stillbirth it's worth it

countthekicks.org.uk/

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ItsAllGoingToBeFine - I think with your first question you are not understanding the enormous differences between miscarriage and stillbirth.

With early miscarriages (before 12 weeks) there is often some genetic or chromosomal abnormality which means the embryo is not viable to continue it's journey to foetal and baby stage. So yes, the body rejects it either immediately or some weeks later (mmc). I suppose this is what you mean by 'natures way'. Having experienced this myself (as have many others with a rate of around 1 in 4 pregnancies) I know it is upsetting but it is in no way comparable to the heartbreache and trauma of stillbirth.

I don't know much about the most common causes of stillbirth but of the cases I know of in rl and on mn, very few seem to be because of any sort of abnormality in the baby, far more are problems with infections, placenta, blood pressure etc.

Thank you so much OP for starting this thread and thank you for everyone who has shared their stories.

I was only vaguely aware of the dangers - a midwife told me a couple of weeks ago that if you notice a reduction in babies movements to immediately go to the hospital. They prefer having 100 false alarms rather than 1 ignored problem. Before this I hadn't even considered the many things that could wrong for an otherwise healthy baby.

Am only 16 weeks so haven't started feeling kicks yet but will definately get a kicks bracelet - thanks for that link.

Am so sorry for your losses.

So sorry to hear of your losses ladies but thank you for sharing your experiences, it will most certainly help to raise awareness.

This is a great cause & DP ordered me a Count the Kicks bracelet today. :)

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It is common I know 3 people who have had late (37 wks +) stillbirths. Hugely distressing and, as many others have said, nothing 'wrong' with any of the babies. I am pregnant with Number 4 and if I make it to the kicking stage will be taking note of this baby's pattern and going for help if it changes. So sorry for all of you who have dealt with such loss. I have seen friends struggle with people not understanding the magnitude of the grief.

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Thank you for this, my son died at 32 weeks in 2007 - he was absolutely perfect, in fact no reason was found.

If I had been more aware of his kicks and how they were slowing down, who knows - maybe I would have got to the hospital in time to get him monitored, and perhaps he would have survived.

Thank you for starting this thread.

I used a bracelet when I was pg with ds and need to dig it out now I'm pg again (though too early to feel any movement). I found it really helpful as it helped me focus.

In my borough the policy is to use a kick chart, record movements you feel between 9-5pm and it it's less than 10, go to hospital. I found this far too rigid and pretty stressful. I was at work at these times, I'm on the go all day and wasn't as aware as I was in early morning / evening of any movements. But I was told, it HAD to be between 9-5.

You become aware pretty quickly of your babies pattern, so surely it's better to follow that, rather than what I was told. I went in once, but all was fine thankfully.

We need to learn that paranoia is not really an issue in pregnancy in that if you feel something isn't quite right, it's fine to go straight to hospital and get it checked out!

That's so true Icould, and something I wish more women were aware of.

All of my midwives in my subsequent pregnancies have said they would far, far rather someone went in to get checked 'unnecessarily' than they didn't go in as they thought they would be a nuisance.

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Thank you for posting this. I spent yesterday in hospital being checked out because my normally very active baby barely kicked for 12 hours and this thread was one of the reasons I went in. Thankfully all seems fine but I am going back in for a scan today to check its growth as reduced movements are often a result of slowed growth.

Louey, same as you - I went in last night after worrying for 3 days about reduced movement. All absolutely fine and I was a bit embarrased at having wasted the midwife's time, but they were so good about it and at no point did they suggest I'd done the wrong thing. It has to be a case of better safe than sorry with babies. And I agree with whoever said that still birth should be given as much publicity as cot death, people have to know the risks.

I haven't had a stillbirth and my heart goes out to anyone who has suffered so devastatingly. I wish you and your familes all the luck in the world.

I do wonder about late-stage monitoring in the UK though.

I had my daughter abroad (Singapore) and was jokingly mocked by friends back home that my having weekly or bi-monthly scans throughout my pregnancy (I also had a high risk of miscarriage in early pregnancy due to Asherman's Syndrome which my ob/gyn cured me of).

Of course, some of it was down to the hospitals wish to earn the Bupa dollar.

But if I hadn't been so frequently they may not have spotted the sudden onset of severe preeclampsia (was all absolutely fine and had low blood pressure) in week 35 which necessitated my daughter's swift removal within 24 hours. I hate to think what could have happened if I hadn't been scheduled for a check up.

I had no symptoms that I was aware of at the time -- just felt shit because I was still throwing up and it was so hot there. I wouldn't have felt the need to present myself.

And my daughter never kicked as she was frank breech, so counting movement wouldn't have helped.

This baby is a lot more active and I do feel kicks and will monitor them. Although I'm screamingly healthy I am 39 years old.

Louey and Cara - glad your babies are ok and yes you did the right thing. There is no room for error here. Midwives etc are paid to ensure the health of you and your baby - you are never wasting their time!

This may be a funny question, but is it just kicks that count? I mean do I count the different movements as well? I'm 36+3 weeks and I think my baby is so big he doesn't really kick that often anymore, but rather moves around etc.

The thing about kicks is that you know the baby is there making a purposeful movement. A baby who is in trouble is still going to shift around in there with your motion and surounded by fluid as they are. So you want to be feeling definate strong movements. It's about knowing what's normal for you though. Some babies do move less than others. Dd3 for me was very active, dd2 definately less so. some more advice here. If you are at all worried then ring your midwife and get checked out.

Marabou saddly babies that have already died still move around in the womb because they are in fluid. Something I didn't find out until recently - presumably there is a different feel to definitive baby movement and natural fluid movement but that is why it's cound the kicks rather than just movement.

LF - what happened to you both was an accident. Beyond your control or influence. You didn't endanger your baby though I can understand why you might think that. Totally different scale of thing but I blamed myself bitterly for dd2's heart defect. On an intellectual level I know it wasn't my fault - but knowing and living that are two different things.

I agree about the brushing under the carpet thing. It seems to me that the number of stillbirths we have now is an expected norm - nobody is rioting about it. If that was mothers - or even babies after birth - dying in such numbers and with so little root cause analysis there would be outrage. Stillborn children matter.

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