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Will strawberry blonde/'ginger' hair stay?- upset!

65 replies

Bluberry · 12/03/2013 02:43

My beautiful baby girl was born with red/'ginger' or strawberry blonde hair. In some lights it looks really fair and in others light brown but today it started looking quite red.
My husband and I are quite dark but I understand the red gene must be in our genes somewhere. My step daughter has bright red hair so it wasnt a complete shock but I didn't realise my family had the gene either so wasn't expecting it really. My step daughter was born with fiery red hair but my daughters is lighter.

I just feel so worried and upset that she may be open to bullies. People are already commenting on it and using the word 'ginger' which I think is hurtful.

Does anyone else have a red head and how does it make you feel?
Did anyone's baby's hair colour change from red to blonde or brown?

I don't want to cause offence.

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ouryve · 12/03/2013 23:16

Many of us dye our hair red.

I got picked on for having a crooked nose, having big boobs, having a flat chest, being too clever for my own good, wearing the wrong clothes, having the wrong accent, being too fat, being too thin.

In short, kids can be shits and don't need ginger hair as the excuse.

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ouryve · 12/03/2013 23:19

Have to post this here :o

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Thingiebob · 12/03/2013 23:19

But ginger isn't hurtful, it's a description.

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Sleepingbunnies · 12/03/2013 23:20

My 18 month old daughter is very ginger. I am very dark brown her dad is reddish / blonde. I love it. Her elder sister who is just blonde/brown won't let anyone call her ginger and insists on calling her strawberry blonde!

I am baffled that you are ao worried about it?! Confused

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fluffypillow · 12/03/2013 23:30

My two older boys were born blonde, still are, but darker.

When my Daughter came along, I expected she would be the same colouring, but as soon as she was born (before I'd even laid eyes on her) the midwife said 'oooh, you've got a strawberry!' . Very strange thing to say Confused

As the days went by, she seemed to become a little more red, and people commented on it often. Then, a few weeks later her hair started to get lighter, and it turned blonde!

She is 2 now, and has no red at all. She is completely blonde.

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McGilly · 12/03/2013 23:37

Maybe time to stock up on Mernda merchandise from Brave!

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steppemum · 12/03/2013 23:42

If you want to know how ginger she might end up, look at her eyelashes and eyebrows. ds was ginger on every hair of his body from birth, he actually had almost no hair as a baby, but there was no doubt her was going to be a red head.

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steppemum · 12/03/2013 23:43

Thingiebob - my ds gets upset if you call him ginger.

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luanmahi · 12/03/2013 23:43

My hair was really ginger when I was younger but has become duller (and now is getting the odd grey hair which is slightly concerning) and I go out of my way to dye it as bright red as I can.

And ginger isn't offensive. It's the name of a hair colour.

I always remember being told some of the most beautiful women in the world had red hair. If it's good enough for Rita Hayworth, Maureen O'Hara, Sophia Loren, Ann Margaret, Susan Sarandon, Nicole Kidman, Isla Fisher, Amy Adams, Florence Welch and Lily Cole, it's good enough for anyone.

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steppemum · 12/03/2013 23:45

and it isn't a description. I have never seen fresh ginger root, or ground ginger that is anywhere near the colour of ds hair.

His hair is bright orange, not red or ginger, actually orange. But whatever the colour, he hates it Sad and it is so lovely

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mashpot · 12/03/2013 23:47

Wow, the word ginger is hurtful to you? I honestly can't believe this is what you worry about for child.

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CarpeDiemCras · 12/03/2013 23:50

As a full blown ginger, I fail to see why on earth you would want your child to change.

You are dark, she's still fair, but might be ginger. So she could be anything from strawberry blonde through auburn by the sounds of things. I'm assuming she's still tiny, so can't see the merit in over-thinking this at the moment.

Honestly OP, I know you don't mean offence, but it is a little bit offensive. Try substituting redhead with other features or inate characteristic kids might use to take the piss / bully and see how it sounds.

Oh and I hope to god your step daughter isn't seeing any of your worries about this. Kid doesn't need to know it'd be a relief not to be ginger...

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steppemum · 12/03/2013 23:53

no, the word isn't hurtful to me. But lots of people have said it is just the description of a colour. I disagree. I think ginger is used as an insult in the UK (or maybe just in England). My ds has been known to burst into tears when people call him ginger, or gingernut or carrot tops. He is a pretty tough 10, but he has been teased over his hair, and he feels powerless as he can't change it, and it makes him stick out like a sore thumb.

he is mature enough to say that really if they didn't pick his hair they would just find something else, like his big feet. But he does feel it, and he doesn't like it.

So I ''worry about it'' because it causes my ds distress.
I thought I had actually made that clear already, Hmm

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steppemum · 12/03/2013 23:54

And I love his red hair and wouldn't change it for the world. I hope one day he feels the same

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soontobeslendergirl · 12/03/2013 23:58

leaving aside the arguments about whether it is likely to lead to bullying etc.

Sometimes when the hair is changing from dark to light it goes through a slightly red phase usually within the fisrt few months as the prper hair starts to come in. We have a few red heads in my family i have a sister with proper red and 2 brothers with fair red. My mum always says that the red heads are either red or bald to start with. she didn't have any or been in contact with any babies that went red from another colour if that helps.

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soontobeslendergirl · 13/03/2013 00:02

steppemum - if he has the confidence it's better to make his own issue of it. I know a little boy who calls himself "the ginja ninja". Other kids think he is cool and after you've used the word yourself it loses the ability to hurt. If someone calls him ginger he just shouts back, "yes, that's me, the ginja ninja!"

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ThatVikRinA22 · 13/03/2013 00:08

i should be a red head, i have green eyes and very pale skin. i used to dye it red. i loved it.

im having a blonde spell now and enjoying that too.

you are worrying over nothing - truly. anything that stands out on anyone can be a target for bullies - my dd (15) has blonde waist length hair, she is 5ft 7 and stunning.

she gets called 'spaghetti legs'.

because she has legs like a giraffe and she is very slim. go figure that one out! i cant.
she is beautiful and clearly inspires jealousy. red hair is lovely. i really wouldnt worry.

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ProPerformer · 13/03/2013 00:20

Personally I find red haired women extremely beautiful! My friend has the most wonderful red hair and is bloody GORGEOUS!!
In my view, people bully people with red hair because they're Jelous!

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TheSecondComing · 13/03/2013 00:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThatVikRinA22 · 13/03/2013 00:32

....and i would bet that as a natural red head you can go any colour...easily. lighten up to blonde....easy.

go darker....easy.

im naturally very dark brown which i truly dont think fits my colouring at all. Red worked and blonde works - but its all a bit hard to maintain from brown!

we are never happy are we whatever we have....if you have straight hair you want curls.
curly people want poker straight hair....
blondes want to be brunettes
brunetts fancy a change and want to be blonde...

if we are short we want to be tall and wear heels
if we are tall we stand out too much and wear flats....
we change our eye colour with contacts
we change our hair colour with dyes
we change our skin colour with fake tan

we are never happy! be assured that what ever your DD ends up with she will colour it something else! Grin

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TheSecondComing · 13/03/2013 00:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bluberry · 13/03/2013 20:08

Hubby's gran was a red head but there doesn't seem to be any red in our family. I keep reading that it must be present on both sides but I'm wondering if it might change as it doesn't seem to be on my side - although in sure it could be underlying.

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Umlauf · 13/03/2013 20:22

I'm pregnant now. DH has the most beautiful hair I have ever seen on a man. It's thick, shiny, and a really rich, darkish ginger.

I am soooo hoping our baby will have his hair.

He, on the other hand, is not, due to his own experience of school name calling. So I can see both sides of the argument. I do think boys get teased more than girls about it sadly.

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Bluberry · 13/03/2013 21:21

CarpeDiemCras- As for the comments about my dsd. She is 16 and has lived through years of bullying to the point where she dyes her hair dark and refuses to allow even a root of red through so I am not being unkind and calling her ginger. It upsets me to think that she was bullied about it and knowing how it made her feel, and how she has escaped it now by dying her hair, I worry that this will all be repeated for my child!!

I appreciate that kids will pick on anything different.

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CarpeDiemCras · 13/03/2013 22:20

Sad to hear that about your DSD Bluberry. I hope as she gets older that improves & she comes to feel better about it.

I do know some people who were teased horribly about their hair, but your DSD's experiece sounds like it must've been particularly bad if she's still feeling that way at 16.

I suspect most red heads do put up with a bit of stick & maybe even a bit more than a non-red headed child, but it won't necessarily be a repeat of your DSD's experience.

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