Is it just me or do some mothers get on your t*ts????

[soknackered]

I met a group of ladies few years ago at a baby group when we had our first and we have kept in touch over years/ kids play together etc / new babies have arrived etc.

we all have different ideas on parenting but just recently, one or two have started to really irritate me. I respect everyones right to bring up their kids how they choose but some are just too damn opinionated. We have a GF fan amongst us and if i hear once more what a nightmare she is having as her baby has woken ONCE and so the routine might be broken and what will she do etc I dont think i will be responsible for my tongue!!!

poor kid is probably cold/ill/hungry. and because i am slightly more relaxed i get 'advice' ALL the time from them about how to be strict. I dont want to be strict. My kids are happy and well looked after nd hug and kiss all the time!

I have had som serious stuff to deal with over years and just wonder....do some have that little to worry about? Can women not just be grateful that they have HEALTHY kids....go to a childrens ward and see how hard some parents have it!!!! AAAAAaRRRRGGGHHHHH

rant over!!!!

[thumbwitch]

ack, you wean babies on lead? that's so wrong...




in the end though, it's not about what you do yourself, it's about whether you push it onto others as being the only right way forward. It might be right for you but not for them - not your choice/decision.

[roslily]

I am lucky that my baby group is a mixture of BF/FF with lots of jar weaning, pram pushing, disposable nappy buying etc mums. No guilt trips or right onners there.

[scottishmummy]

guru saag paneer has a lot to say about baby lead weaning too

[JenAT]

scottishmummy. Guru sag aloo.
Ooo I could just eat some Sag aloo now, yummy!

[UniS]

Its just gripeing about work isn;t it. same as we would grumble that teh wareouse was cold, the tea crap and teh lunchbreak not long enough, we would grumble thatteh phone rang when we were in teh middle of something, whinge abut a co-worker being late, smelly or a pain in teh neck. All that grumble stuff keep teh world of work going, so why not teh world of new work, parenting.

[scottishmummy]

braggy gurus who describe selves as cloth wearing,baby carrying parents - all earnest types who chatter as if every damn decision is vital for maximus really annoy me. unclench be spontaneous.no one cares what guru sag aloo said about attachment.really no one

[roslily]

I go to two, and I find them good for getting out of the house and talking to other humans!

None of my friends have kids yet, apart from one who lives 200 miles away. Many of the people I know locally are at work during day, and less than happy to sit while I walk a screamy baby around as he won't let me sit down.

At baby groups someone will hold him while I go to toilet or have cup of tea, and not worry about vomit/crying/burping

Maybe I am one of the annoying ones!

[Skimty]

I've got a brilliant one:

I suggested to NCT group that I really appreciated how difficult SPs hhave it after having had DS. One replied that 'yes, the other night DD only had 5oz rather than her usual 6oz and I don't know what I would have done without DH there.'

[soknackered]

yeah i went to one of those ONCE! now i am sure there are some fantastic people go (disclaimer) but at the one i went to on the day that i went it was full of women that i wouldnt touch with mine if i had one! .

They all had huge thighs strangely enough!

[busymummy3]

went to a few with first 2 dc's didnt bother with last dc. found the worst toddler groups were those run by NCT full of right on mothers (the brown rice brigade we called them!)who had the most badly behaved kids in the world who were never told off other then a very mild chastising "dont thats very naughty " if they happened to be sinking their teeth into another childs arm then continueing their very in depth excrutiatingly boring tales of childbirth and breastfeeding to their chums. couldnt stand it and left after a few sessions .

[MrsNarcissist]

It has nothing to do with your job/career....the implication there is rather . However some people have little to chat about and so talk about anything and nothing. These mothers would be irritating without children.

[soknackered]

I just feel like i am the minority!I just dont and cant buy into it all, all that chat about little xxx and butternut squash nappies and tuts to mums that use formula/jars/non organic grub. I wondered if it was because I was a career girl and both pregnancies happened to me out of luck (and the obv) and not as part of a well documented life plan that had been written when I was 14 or some nonsense!

Perhaps I dont take it seriously enough but my kids are my kids, part of me and the family and we laugh eat hug play ans sleep (not v often) and that is that.

I would just rather talk to adults about more intersting stuff at times....and yet I am writing on here about this!!! How hypocritical am I

[CommonNortherner]

It's not just a mum thing though is it. If a person is that type they're going to be that type with or without kids.

[messalina]

I agree with the OP. I find mothers with set ideas and a parenting PLAN very tiresome indeed. I find the anxious ones especially irritating. The ones whose brow furrows if their child won't eat as much dinner as usual, or who obssess pointlessly over why their toddler might have woken up that night? Could it be teething? Maybe he was too hot, maybe he's out of his routine. Is it because he has a cold? I don't give a flying fuck. Talk about something more interesting. (and get a job..and a life).

[thumbwitch]

Hmm - well depending on your finances you could go to Tumble tots with the 3yo but not the 6mo, unless you have him/her in a sling while you help your 3yo around the course.

I did go to gymbabies and babyswimming so DS got to see other children and interact with them, but I never really got to "know" any of the other parents much, apart from a "hi how are you" chat. A friend of mine took her DD to a baby music group - I think actvity groups tend to be less "navel-gazing" about parenting, iyswim, more about the activity.

FWIW, I didn't experience any parental competitiveness in either activity group!

[soknackered]

Bloody hell what have I started?!?!?! Must be the snow pissing everyone off! Thanks for your comments anyway!

Think I need to start retracting a bit and doing other stuff outside of the competitive and sometimes vicious world of baby groups!

Any suggestions? 3 year old and 6 month old in tow! Hilarious suggestions welcome to warm up my humour on this freezing cold day

[misshardbroom]

thanks, satc2, yes, it was initially just a flippant comment on what started out as a light hearted thread!

[thumbwitch]

what ajandjjmum said - but if you find them insufferable, move on and find some different people who are more on your wavelength.

I never went to ante-natal classes, nor post-natal groups, nor M&B groups so I don't have personal experience of them - friends' tales of them were enough for me to decide I'd be better off without! (plus I knew I was going to be emigrating shortly so didn't need to make the social contacts for DS's sake).

[satc2bringiton]

MHB - I did have a smile reading your 'grow a pair' remark - I dont think it was meant too seriously

OP - Yes very annoying when anyone tries to give you parenting 'advice' when your not even asking for it - infact quite rude IMO

[chopsache]

Tbh I don't mind other mums (or dads) telling me about their children's sleep patterns or feeds or dirty nappies, especially if they're stressed out about it and need to get it off their chest. I would object, however, to someone giving me unwanted/unasked for advice on how to be strict with my own kids as the OP said.

[Paleodad]

How dare you insinuate that i am a devotee of SHE....

[stagefright]

Well I must be the odd one out because I met a wonderful group of mothers (and fathers) and have continued meeting weekly with them for 3.5years. One lady out of 11 is a little like this but its easy not to take notice when there are so many other open minded mums each with their own parenting style but happy to let you get on with your way of doing things.

[BambinolovesBeccie]

What TheWhiteStuff said!!. M&B groups make my teeth itch.

Now DS is coming up to 1, I have started him at nursery for 2 days a week. Lots of fun for him without me having to deal with the competitive mums.

[misshardbroom]

They aren't contradictory.

They can be as preoccupied as they want with any of those topics, they just don't have to tell me about them.

Neither do women.

It is quite possible to be an involved, interested, proactive father without updating everyone on which page you've reached in the She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named book.

That is my personal view. You are fully entitled to yours.