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How to get out of house with 4 week old

58 replies

Bex134 · 14/02/2017 17:50

Hi everyone
I have a 4 week old- and feeling a little house bound. At the moment I can't shower until 1.30pm when DS has a decent nap. Naps before this are on me as he isn't settling in his crib in the morning and he wakes at 5.30 and doesnt really settle after. My husband leaves the house at 7am- should I get up and shower before he leaves.. any other thoughts?? Would love to be showered by 10am is this realistic?? Bx

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Backhometothenorth · 23/02/2017 13:31

That's great news OP. Hope you enjoy your showers and manage to get out and about more now. Try a bath next perhaps- you never know!!

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mistermagpie · 23/02/2017 11:40

I was another one with the baby in a bouncy chair in the bathroom. We've got a clear shower screen so he could see me and i could see him. Sometimes he cried, but it's only a couple of minutes and they are in sight all the time so what's the harm? I found that if I could get a shower and dressed as soon as I got up (before DH left for work ideally, but he doesn't leave until about 8:15) then it made such a big difference to how the day went. You can always bung a bit of make-up on later if you have five minutes and want to feel a bit more human but that's a luxury.

PPs are right that it actually gets harder when they can move. DS is now 19mo and I either shower before he wakes in the morning (he's not an early riser and I'm up for work anyway) or during his naps if I'm at home all day. I can't bring him into the bathroom anymore as he starts wrecking the place and trying to get into the shower with me!

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user1487849259 · 23/02/2017 11:31

I've been having the same problem, didn't even think about bringing the baby in the bathroom with me! Great idea x

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merrymouse · 23/02/2017 09:20

Both my children loved the sound of the shower so bouncy chair worked well for me.

However, with a second child you also learn that sometimes babies have to wait.

If a shower takes five minutes and makes you feel able to face the day, just make sure your baby is safe and have the shower.

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usernoidea · 23/02/2017 09:12

My baby fitted in with my life a bit more than I changed to fit his.
So, I was out with him by myself on week one, had showers with him next to me etc...
Yes he might get upset but I'm glad I started all this early
I know mums who are months down the road and still barely go out/shower/leave the room etc. I think this sounds a difficult thing to crack later on so start early - they will get used to it x

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ceeveebee · 23/02/2017 09:05

Glad you've managed it! I had twins and always just left them in their cots with their light/music mobile playing - probably helped that there were two of them so maybe didn't feel so alone, and also to be honest I think I just accepted that with two, there would usually be one crying at any given time! It's so important to feel human again and get out and about. I did cut my hair into a pixie crop though as otherwise just never had time to dry it!

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lostandconfused6576i · 23/02/2017 08:56

Lakehouse - I think I'll try this with my 5 week old. He hates being bathed (lots of tears) but enjoyed it when I took him in the bath with me. I think a shower would be easier to get a baby in and out of...I'll just have to have the water a lot cooler!

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ineedwine99 · 23/02/2017 08:43

Hi OP, i've just put baby either in her bouncer chair or laid on the floor on a few towels, she'd just lay there staring at the lights Smile

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lakehouse · 23/02/2017 08:21

I brought baby into the shower with me from 3 days old. Lovely skin on skin time, he was so happy and loved it. If I needed to wash my hair I put him in a nest of towels on the floor, jumped in washed hair then gathered him up and brought him in for a wash. He's still a water baby now.

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passingthrough1 · 23/02/2017 07:44

Oh my Gosh, I remember this being just so hard. Baby screamed when not in my arms .. fair enough it's normal but you are bleeding and have stitches to heal and NEED bathroom breaks and a shower or bath. I remember being so jealous of people whose partners left at normal times giving them time to clean themselves ... mine left at 6am and no help again until late evening so it was a long day. I didn't eat lunch for the first month.
Personally I found the bouncy chair in bathroom worked well from a later age. I still do that now (7 months) and will keep doing until he no longer fits in bouncy chair! From about 12 weeks until I switched to chair at about 4 months I used a sleepyhead or cocoonababy type thing in the bathroom. Before this though it wasn't so much about hearing or seeing you it was being constantly held. Sleepyhead was a bit of a surrogate for this but sling at least allows you to go to the loo and wash in sink.
I loooooved weekends when I would have a loooooong bath.

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Daisies123 · 23/02/2017 07:38

Yay, glad it's worked for you! Getting out of the house made such a difference to us - I had PND and nearly went totally bonkers just being at home all day with DD when DH went back to work.

When she was sitting up on her own I started taking her in the shower with me- non-slip mat in bottom and a couple of bath toys to hold. She loved it and it's now how I wash her hair all the time.

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Bex134 · 23/02/2017 04:28

Just noticed this thread has been added as one of the banners - how exciting!

So I've taken your advice- told myself it's fine if he cries during shower. Interestingly he hasn't and has sat happily in his chair after a feed whilst I chat to him. We've done this for the last 2 days and it's made such a difference as it feels we can leave the house and do nice things - me being more chilled is definitely helping too!

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Inneedofaholiday2017 · 22/02/2017 20:44

My toddler used to come help me in the bath playing with her water toys by the side (i had it really full so she could reach). I could stay in the bath for hours! She used to love helping mummy!

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welshmist · 22/02/2017 20:34

Did anyone take baby in the shower with them, my three used to love being cuddled in the shower after I had had mine. I could clean them up with plain water then wrap them in a towel whilst I dried and dressed. When they were toddlers they would sit under it with water cascading over them, no fear of water at all.

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Dragongirl10 · 22/02/2017 20:27

I used to get my baby up for a feed at 7am, change her nappy, leave her on a big pile of soft towels outside the shower, have a quick shower and hairwash whilst talking/singing to her, then take her with me and put her into a moses basket beside me whilst l dried my hair , and put mascara on.

Once they are fed/ changed you can put them down ...

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Sparrowlegs248 · 22/02/2017 19:47

Yes you're definitely more relaxed with the second. Saying that my second is so far an easier baby than the first. Will be put down for a start which helps!

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WarblingWail · 22/02/2017 16:23

God, don't get out of bed early!!! Sleep for as long as baby lets you, then get up, feed, change baby nappy and get baby dressed, then jump in the shower.

This probably makes me sound really mean, but my DS gets left in his cot with toys/mobile/baby sensory on laptop while I shower each morning. As long as he's not properly crying, I ignore a bit of grizzling and have a ten minute shower/brush my teeth. I can then entertain him by making odd noises or pulling faces with him plonked in the middle of the bed while I blast my hair with the hair dryer and get dressed. I can see him in his cot from my shower though.

We then go downstairs and I have a cup of tea/stick a washload on/unload dishwasher while he gets put in baby bouncer, playmat etc before we do whatever we need to do outdoors for the day (trip to supermarket, walk with pram, head out to meet friends).

The only baby group I've enjoyed is bounce and rhyme at my local library. I'd recommend seeing if you have similar near you.

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Crunchyside · 22/02/2017 15:57

It's actually kind of worse once they're at the crawling/pulling themselves up stage though because then you can't even have a 60 second shower without the risk of them exploring the bathroom and chucking toys down the toilet! Shock

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Crunchyside · 22/02/2017 15:55

Personally I don't shower every day but on the days I do feel like I need freshening up, I think I'd just put my hair in a shower cap to keep that dry, and have a really fast 1-2 minute shower with baby in the bouncer. Just a quick hose down with some nice smelling shower gel, makes you feel so much better. If they don't like being in the bouncer, crying for 60 seconds isn't going to do any harm when they can see and hear you right there!

The funny thing is I made a thread very similar to this with my first baby about 3 years ago and I couldn't understand why a lot of people were like "that's ridiculous, have a bloody shower, stick the baby in a bouncer, let them cry for a minute" etc. because at the time that just sounded like a ridiculous idea. I'm due my second soon and I think this time I'm going to be a lot less uptight about these things - now I've had 3 years of baby/toddler experience I now realise how much you can actually achieve in 60 seconds Grin

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minipie · 22/02/2017 15:16

I found a morning shower crucial too, especially with lack of sleep.

If your baby is unsettled from 5.30 (so you're not getting great sleep then anyway) I think your best bet may be to get up earlier and shower before DH leaves.

Bouncy chair in bathroom worked but not at 4 weeks (maybe by 10 weeks or so? can't really remember).

Cot mobile like the Fisher price one linked to above was my saviour. Just long enough for a shower. Available second hand quite cheaply. I had one by Tiny Love and it was fab.

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Backhometothenorth · 22/02/2017 13:15

My now six month old loves lieing in the (empty) baby bath while I shower and has done since very young. Pop blanket or towel in the bottom, bathroom lights, fan and shower on. Incey wincey spider or similar in your best singing voice and voila!! Enjoy your shower! Sling everywhere else. Good luck with it- as others have said, just go for it and you'll feel so much better for it Flowers

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Newmother8668 · 22/02/2017 12:55

My baby could t even be in the bouncer in the bathroom while I showered until he was 12 weeks! I ended up showering just before my DH got up for work. After that, when he was 6 weeks old, I started using the gym Creche. That was heavenly and still is!!

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Mountainsofmothermadness · 22/02/2017 12:44

I used to have a quick bath in the morning with the moses basket in with me and same again the pm when other half was home (bleeding is the worst)

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MoreThanUs · 21/02/2017 09:22

There's nothing like getting on and doing it to know you can!
If you have another DC, there will come a time that by 9am you'll have showered / fed baby / breakfasted / dressed and done school run and you'll back at these days and laugh!
As long as your DC is fed, clean and safe, leave her as you shower. If she cries a bit, it doesn't matter.
Every day just pack up and get out - every day will get easier and earlier and you'll get into the swing of it.

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NoraDora · 21/02/2017 09:15

I've learned it's worth letting baby cry for 3 mins whilst I grab a shower, compared to how I feel without one. A strip wash actually takes me longer than a shower.

Second the advice of pack the bag the night before. I always re stock it on my return to the house as baby is usually asleep in the pram. If I'm going for a walk I don't take the changing bag as there's nowhere to change him.

If I know baby is fed but crying I'll put him in the pram because he will drop off.

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