Dummies

[SnowWhite26]

Hi.
I have 9 week girl. She loves sucking and has found her fist but cant keep it in her mouth so gets cross. I give her a dummy at night and she self settles.she stirs in the night and starts sucking hands but cant settle bk without dummy. In day time she goes through times when she just wants to chill suckibg her dumny. If we are out and about she is fine without abd when we play shes ok with out it. Is this all normal.Another thing she does is spit it out if she wants attention.didnt no 9 week olds were so manipultive haha. Is this all normal? Thanks

[SnowWhite26]

She doesnt cry for food and even thos morn she wasnt that starving. I think she could scream at me if she was hungry.

[UmbongoUnchained]

Wow.

[SnowWhite26]

Wow what?

[nephrofox]

Mine have dummies but my general rule of thumb is if they woke more than once in an hour (ie 2am and 2.40am) I would feed. This generally led to more solid sleep afterwards, for everyone.

Dummy 6 times in 2 hours definitely indicates hunger to me. She may well have slept properly if you'd fed her (and therefore you would too!) Worth a try surely?

[ODog]

All normal. She's absolutely tiny so she's definitely not spitting it out to get your attention. You are probably leaving the room so she is crying for you to hold her and in doing so end up spitting it out. Crying to be held is normal and needing to suckle is normal at that age. Follow her cues and you will be fine.

As for causing ear problems - I have never heard of that.

[BendydickCuminsnatch]

Dummies are also recommended for relieving headaches etc, DS was born with forceps and they were recommended as the sucking helps relieve some pressure in the skull. If DS has a cold he wants his dummy more even though he can't nose-breathe, I think it's because he has a headache. But then he gets frustrated because he cant't mouth-breathe and suck at the same time, haha Also really good for comfort obvs, very calming and makes them feel secure.
I wouldn't worry OP, I think everything you're doing sounds normal. And at least with dummies you can get orthodontic ones, you can't get orthodontic thumbs! I sucked my thumb until I was like 18 though and my teeth are great.

[BendydickCuminsnatch]

Also yes nephrofox's first para!

[SnowWhite26]

Thanks for advice. So you didnt always wait for your baby to scream for food?

[UmbongoUnchained]

Is this a wind up? Of course you don't wait for your baby to scream for food what the hell is wrong with you?!

[jessplussomeonenew]

Screaming is a late hunger cue - early cues include rooting, mouthing etc. Definitely best to feed before they get to screaming as otherwise thay can be too stressed to feed well! www.drmomma.org/2013/01/your-babys-signs-of-hunger.html may be helpful.

[SparklyTinselTits]

At 9 weeks, awake for 2 hours in the night will almost always be hunger!! Why are you in such a hurry to not feed her at night? She's only 9 weeks old! My DD was still feeding once in the night at 4 months old.

[SnowWhite26]

Let me just say i am more than happy to feed at night my hv is the one saying she doesnt need it anymore. Hence my confusion. I have always got her up for a feed when she started squirming and not settling. My hv said i should wait for her to cry which as i have just said i have never done. She said that with the dream feed she shouldhave had more than enuff food and that babys fussin there sleep.hence why im just very confused

[LaurieLemons]

She will let you know if she's hungry don't worry about it. If she settles back down when you put the dummy in, then she's not hungry. If she's spitting it back out or not settling then try feeding her. How on earth would your health visitor know if she's getting enough? Babies drink different amounts and different times. Also, she can't learn to settle at 9 weeks old she knows nothing, stick with what you're doing it sounds fine.

[imwithspud]

If she's waking that frequently then I'd say she probably needs feeding. My 6month old still wakes in the night, I know when she's hungry because she either won't accept the dummy or she settles briefly but wakes shortly after. She will then sleep for another few hours once fed. She rarely screams for food, not all babies do.

[ODog]

Agree with pp. just feed her is you are up for 2 hrs in the middle of the night. My DS fed at least once in the night until he was 8/9months, not weeks. Ignore the HV. Don't stress about the dummy. Follow her cues and go with your instincts. She's so so tiny.

[comeagainforbigfudge]

SnowWhite my dd was the same with dummies/waking up etc. I fed on demand (still do to an extent). She's formula fed and at that age she gradually starting dropping night feeds herself. But we still fed her overnight if she woke. It's not going to hurt her, and she is only 9 weeks!

As for the dummy. Try to remember it's not for you. It's an aid to comfort your baby. She's not spitting it out on purpose as such. It's just falling out. She'll soon learn to pick it up and put it back in herself. My 6 month old routinely examines her dummy intently before either putting it to one side or putting it in her mouth.

I'm assuming it's your first? It's such a steep learning curve isn't it? Trying to figure out cues etc I find that I'm just getting a handle on reading my dd's cues, then no doubt they'll all change again, pfft!

[LittleMiss77]

OP, have you tried winding your Dd when she is unsettled at night? My DS will become unsettled sometimes and more often than not its because he needs some help getting those burps out. Once done, he falls straight back to sleep.

[SnowWhite26]

She is my first child there is so mu h advice.my hv said its like if every night we stirred and someone gave us cake we would quickly get in the habit. Its just working out whats hunger and whats habit

[SnowWhite26]

I agree i no the dummy is my issue. Hopefully she will get out the habit of waking and the dummy wont be sich an issue

[fruitpastille]

Your hv sounds a bit old fashioned. I didn't think about night weaning until about 6 months although it's true some babies sleep through. I also used a dummy but expected baby to feed approx every 3-4 hours. To be honest my boobs would hurt if I left it longer. I used a dummy wherever and whenever up to the first year and then cut it back to naps and journeys or when ill. It is a pain getting up to replace it till they learn to do it themselves. Always removed it for photos though :-)

[bittapitta]

Wow your HV is very misguided. 9 weeks is still newborn and you should feed on demand. Including overnight at that age. You shouldn't get in the habit of letting a baby get to the point of crying with hunger OP.

[SnowWhite26]

Do you think? I was suprized she suggested sleeping through although it has sort of worked. Oh i dont know lol

[jessplussomeonenew]

Some babies start sleeping through early and spontaneously drop night feeds, other continue night feeding for ages.

Here's one suggested timescale:

Night Weaning: Baby Night Feedings By Age

While there isn’t a “magical age” at which every baby is ready for night weaning, there are some general guidelines for night feedings that seem to work for most babies:

• Newborns to 3 months old: Feedings every 2-3 hours, on demand
• 3-4 Months: 2-3 feedings per night or every 3-6 hours, on demand
• 5-6 Months: 1-2 night feedings
• 7-9 Months: 1, maybe 2, night feedings
• 10-12 Months: Sometimes 1 night feeding
• 12+ Months: Generally no feedings

NB I wouldn't regard these as a maximum by any means. My 16mo still feeds at night, but is slowly cutting back on his own!

[freespiritsbadattitude]

Your HV sounds dangerously out of date. Nine weeks is very, very tiny, the vast majority of babies are still feeding every 2-3 hours through the night at this point.

[bittapitta]

Fwiw my first baby did "sleep through" (ie 6-7 hour stretches) at 9 weeks! But if she stirred and needed settling I'd feed as first priority.