I've just smuggled a bottle of wine past my mother.....

[handlemecarefully]

She is staying for a few days because she will be looking after dd and ds over the weekend whilst we attend a wedding.

Last night after I had drunk two bottles of budweiser, she said with her customary Yorkshire directness:

"You haven't been drinking those have you - first sign of alcoholism that; needing a drink every day"

So this evening with a certain amount of stealth, I put a bottle of wine in the fridge to chill, and after about an hour really fancied a glass, so I have smuggled it from the kitchen, past the living room (where mum was watching 'The Bill' or other such high brow stuff - bless 'er) in the laundry basket - cunning disguise eh?

However haven't got any wine glasses up here in the spare bedroom, so have had to decant some wine into an empty coke can - as somehow that appeared more appropriate than swigging direct from the bottle.

Not having a go about my mum - she's a love (although says the wrong thing sometimes), but am now wondering if I am a total lush

[moschops]

my mum is the one who told my sister off one christmas day for going to get a second bottle of beer from the fridge (sister was about 22 and living back at home after finishing uni)....because you don't drink to get drunk.....not in the house anyway and definitley not in the afternoon.

this is the same woman who told me to get myself a brandy for my headache instead of painkillers and fruit juice!!!

my dad also tried telling me off in the pub one night for smoking too much.......the look on his face was priceless when i pointed out everytime i lit a cigarette he did the same!!!

aren't parents brilliant.......i can't wait to see what sort of grandparents my mum and dad are going to be.....

[handlemecarefully]

Ummm - that was snigger at the mumsnet badge. Not snigger at your mum possibly being a lush Bubble

[handlemecarefully]

Snigger!

[bubble99]

Naa. Just a lush

[WideWebWitch]

HMC I go to Wilton House when I come to see friends in Salisbury, and we went to the library last time I was there, last summer. Ooh, I must get a mumsnet badge!

[handlemecarefully]

Your mum sounds coooool!

[bubble99]

My mum always arrives armed with goodies and a couple of bottles of wine when she comes to stay. For Grandma Bubble the sun is often over the yard arm.

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[handlemecarefully]

You'd recognise me by the broken thread veins on my cheeks and red bulbous nose (I'm told these are physical signs of alchohol dependency!)

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[handlemecarefully]

No, not often - the cakes are stale. And the bread not much cop either. But the staff are very nice - went in there once with a bad cough and the lady went to fetch me some 'fishermens friends' throat lozenges.

I'm in Landford - but not on that particular road. On the A36 at the top end (still classed as Landford)

Do you ever take the kids to the Central Library in Salisbury, or visit Wilton House? - we might have crossed in the street before....

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[handlemecarefully]

Yep still in Landford. Where were you off to then when driving through? Anywhere interesting?

[LGJ]

HMC

You have me laugh out loud.

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[hewlettsdaughter]

HMC!

[handlemecarefully]

Hic!

The only problem with drinking it from an empty coke can is that it is hard to assess how much you have cosnmed, consmed, consumed!

[moondog]

Bless hmc!!
You do need a nice glass however. It just aint the same without one!
Reminds me of my Presbyterian Staffs grandmother (they weren't allowed cards in their house when young!) who said to me one day in a grim voice when I was about 19, sitting innocently in her front room one morning reading a magazine...

'You won't find the answer in a PUB you know!!'

Que??!!

[sansouci]

Nope, bum's too big! I am a bit of a contradiction, it's true.

[handlemecarefully]

Sansouci at drinking on the job - and you said on another thread that you thought you might be stuffy. I think not young lady! I bet you got the sack for photocopying your bum.

[sansouci]

I did eventually get sacked, but for another reason. I think.

[handlemecarefully]

Must admit, mum's tipple is half a shandy twice a year and a generous glass of Baileys at Christmas, so I suppose it isn't difficult to seem like a hardened drinker by her yardstick...

[sansouci]

I must confess I once got through a particularly dreadful job by regularly spiking glasses of orange juice from the caf with vodka left over from an office party.

[lavenderrr]

lol, tis funny