How many birthday parties has your child been to...

[cloudy]

this school year?

he was in mainstream for 4 terms and went to 2 (both the same child) you're not alone coppertop. I will be eternally ridiculously grateful to thatlittle girl (and her mother) until the day I die.

Not sure whether children at his special school do parties - except in school (doubt it) but at least if I have to invite the whole class there's a maximum of 7

My rule on parties is that my children have to invite everyone in the class / group or just a few, so no one is left out IYSWIM. My kids hate this of course. last year my DD wanted to invite everyone in the class except one child to her birthday party.I know the child and family - the little boy is a loner and pretty much non verbal - i suspect he has SN but is not diagnosed yet.

Mean mum here insisted he was invited. He came abd was just fine. his mum stayed. She said it was the first party he had ever been to. he is 6. i could cry just thinking about her.DD still goes on about it. Oh well it will give her something to discus in therapy

Not sure if i was clear - i mean that if there are 30 in the class they have to invite all 30 or only 4 or 5 close friends. Not 28 leaving out 2.

DD is 2.5 and has been to 1 in the past school year.

DS1 & DS2 are 12.5 & 11 and have been to 1 each.

DS1 is almost 4 and in pre-school nursery - we've had 3 so far (only 8 pre-schoolers in the nursery though as it's a small sessional nursery).

We've had another 1 for a family/NCT friend that both ds1 and ds2 went to and we've got about another 4 of those lined up for March/early April so far and we've got ds1s in April too.

BTW - I ordered books from redhouse.co.uk - you can get 3 for £9 on there but the books are originally £11ish so I've just given those - they won't know I only spent £3 will they?!

too many tbh, 3 parties in half term alone

Lots of sympathy, cloudy. My DS1 really likes parties, too, and I wish he got invited to more. Sounds like you are doing everything you can, though.

Do you know many of the other mums? I often get the impression that the number of party and playdate invites that children get depend more on whether their mums are pals than on whether the children themselves are friends.

Ds (3.5) has got one on Sat and has been to about 4 that have been held at the nursery. He has been there since November. In his life, he has been to a LOT.

TBH, it seems to me that at pre-school age anyway, most of the parties are held at nursery.

I will probably do the same in August for DS' 4th.

I also agree with those that have said that the invites seem to step up a gear once they are at school. DNephew seems to be going to a party every week and he only started school in Sept.

Yesterday a child (who came to DS's party, DS often mentions playing with him) was handing out birthday invites just before school started. DS got all excited thinking he would be invited... but he wasn't, of course. He was a bit confused & lost at the time.

He seemed to forget about it by the time I picked him up from school. But what do I say if he asks... "Mummy, why don't I get invited to any parties?"

I know this isn't a truly "big" problem, but I'm stumped... what do I say if he asks?

Cloudy, I have no idea what I'd say in those circs, fortunately invitations are slipped discretely into school bags by teachers at dD's school so not something we've encountered.

Hopefully your DS will have forgotten by home time, but i do feel for you (and him).

Dd (4 next month) has only been to 2 proper birthday parties - 1 a friend from church, and 1 a little girl from nursery, who stopped going to the same week
One of dd's "best friends" must have mentioned that she was having a party to dd, because dd has been waiting about 2 months to be invited to it. (I know it happened in January)
I put it down to there being a group of mums who've known each other ages, and I'm not one of them. Raises a slight dilemma as to what I'll do next month, especially as dd's birthday is during Easter hols.

stopped going to the same nursery