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dd1's nursery teacher keeps calling her by the wrong name

39 replies

nailpolish · 09/02/2006 16:49

on the way home from playgroup today dd1 told me her playgroup teacher keeps calling her by the wrong name

its dd2's name, and the said teachers has mentioned to me she used to have another child by dd2's name who was very like dd1, so i can see why she maybe gets confused but dd1's been there over 8 mths now!

and dd1 is now getting upset

OP posts:
WigWamBam · 09/02/2006 16:52

I'm not surprised she's getting upset. Worth having a few words with the playgroup leaders, it's not much to ask that they get her name right!

nailpolish · 09/02/2006 16:54

ive noticed she writes everything down when the children appear ie

"Fraser, jeans, red top today"

"Katie, bunches, pink dress"

how would i approach it wwb?

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Mascaraohara · 09/02/2006 17:09

I'd be blunt. I think it's completely unacceptable and rude actually. I'd be furious. Actually have just realised I'm cross on your behalf.

If she can't be bothered to remember a childs name - she's in the wrong job! A sense of belonging is very important to a pre-schooler.

Blandmum · 09/02/2006 17:12

This is very, very unlikely, as this condition is very, very rare, but it is possible

I once worked with someone who chould not recognise faces....facial agnosia, she wore a badge saying 'Talk to me, I can't recognise faces'. the only person she could reconise visualy was some one who always wore very large earing. She was a Fullbright student and astonishingly bright.

Miaou · 09/02/2006 17:22

dd1 was at a nursery where one of the staff would consistently spell her name wrong. When I pointed it out to her she said "OH WE HAD AN X IN NURSERY LAST YEAR WHO SPELT IT LIKE THAT" (oops sorry caps). The next time I told her (after writing it wrong on about twenty pieces of work) I got the same response. It was just one of many problems I had with that nursery and I removed her after a term (incidently, there was another child at that nusery with the same name differently spelt and they never got it wrong!

Miaou · 09/02/2006 17:23

*at the new nursery I mean

MamaG · 09/02/2006 17:26

I'd be furious. It's not too much to ask that they remember her name ffs!

caffeine · 09/02/2006 17:29

agree its totally unacceptable for a nursery member to not remember childrens names! I'd perhaps say something which gets across the point that; "obviously its difficult for the staff to remember all of the childrens names", (bit of false sympathising with the staff - makes them feel less threatened!) but could they make a particular effort with your dd as she is starting to notice that she gets called by the wrong name. This in itself will probably help staff to remember as they will remember you having made this point to them and therefore remember your daughters name? ifyswim?!

CountessDracula · 09/02/2006 17:31

dd's keyworker used to misspell dd's name which I found v irritating but figured he may be a bit dyslexic so didn't say anything

CountessDracula · 09/02/2006 17:31

Could you make a badge with her name on?

WigWamBam · 09/02/2006 17:31

Nailpolish, I'd just tell her that dd is getting upset because she gets her name wrong, and could she make sure that she uses the right name in future. If you don't feel you can talk to the member of staff directly then talk to the manager or whoever is in charge.

It's her job to get it right - don't feel bad about making sure she does.

MaryP0p1 · 09/02/2006 17:35

I know how annoying it is. How big is the playgroup and is she new.

I only ask because I do the same type of job and I have just started a new job. I am a specialist teacher (English) and have 8 different classes of maybe 15 to 30 children, plus teachers etc names to learn. I'll be lucky to learn most by the end of the year. Then I'll have to start again.

nailpolish · 09/02/2006 17:42

there are only 5 children in her group, dd1 is only 1 of 2 girls

i am going to be blunt (but polite!)

the teacher is more approachable than the manager, i will speak to her directly

the name badge is a good idea!

thanks for the advice

wish me luck for tomorrow morning

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MaryP0p1 · 09/02/2006 17:44

I am sure that will sort it out. If it makes you feel any better it shows she well behaved! In my experience the first names you learn are the little 'angels'!!!!!

nailpolish · 09/02/2006 17:44

thanks for the support everyone, i was worried i was overreacting by being angry

dd1 goes 3 mornings and 2 afternoons a week, she loves her afternoon teacher, runs in, but in the morning when she has the forgetful teacher, shes a bit clingy, not nearly so excited

but thats another story

ive got her name down for pre-school next year at the primary

anyway, thanks again

OP posts:
nailpolish · 09/02/2006 17:46

marypop, i never thought of that!

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WigWamBam · 09/02/2006 17:47

How lazy is it not to get every child's name right when you've only got 5 of them in your group? Mind you, if your dd's reaction to her is anything to go by it sounds as if she is lacking in more than one area.

nailpolish · 09/02/2006 17:49

she does seem a kind hearted person though. and dd1 is learning loads. i call her the 'jotter woman'

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MaryP0p1 · 09/02/2006 17:51

Yes after only 3 weeks the I have the tinkers names engraved on my brain!! Oh and there are certain names I immedately think OH no. I know its stereotyping but.....

Blandmum · 09/02/2006 17:52

mary, I will also admit to being crap at learning kids names....youdo learn the 'tinkers' names first. My greatest problem is with nice little girls with mid length, brown hair. Awful job remembering them!

In my defence I do teach about 200 of them

MaryP0p1 · 09/02/2006 18:02

martinbishop, I have exactly the same problem with sweet little girls with brown hair. My problem is made worse by living in Italy, they all have brown hair!!! And the names are virtually the same, Frederico/a Giovani/a see what I mean?

Rowlers · 09/02/2006 18:33

I'm not sure I'd presume she was lazy and I'm not sure I'd be angry either.
She cannot be doing this on purpose; maybe she doesn't even realise she is doing it.
I agree completely that she should know and be using DD's name, but some people are hopeless with names.
I teach 130 kids odd this year. Ok, a bit more than 5!
I do often get it wrong - I KNOW who they are, just the wrong name comes out. God knows why. Never used to happen before I gave birth!

Blandmum · 09/02/2006 18:36

I once called a child by the wrong name.....a simple slip of the tongue as I knew the child's name....for the reasons mentioned in the thread

The mother wrote in and complained about me. Mind you, she accused me of sleeping in the lessons as well WTF?????

robinpud · 09/02/2006 18:56

It actually sounds to me as if the teacher may have a real problem. Writing down a visual prompt for each child is a really unusual thing to do. I might be a little hesitant in your approach, she may have a problem she is trying to deal with discreetly.
Having said that if it is a real problem like MB or a memory issue then there are things she could do, like putting name stickers on the children and playing games about letter recognition etc.
You need to mention it, but I would do so privately and with tact.
If you find out there is no reasona le explanation them by all means be cross!

Twiglett · 09/02/2006 18:58

haven't read thread .. but why don't you .. with DD make her a huge big badge with her name on it and let her wear it to school?

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