Help ds1 has made a large clay cock

[FrannyandZooey]

I mean it is an erect penis. It is in proportion and quite detailed. He didn't intend it for a cock as far as I know - he was just messing about with clay, but the finished model is quite unmistakeably in the shape of a man's genitalia. It has a bell end and everything.

Normally when ds has made a model we varnish it and put it on the windowsill. He is very proud of this model. Wtf am I going to do? I have the health visitor coming round this week and it is not really going to impress her is it.

[justiceandtruth]

@FrannyandZooey have you managed to embarrass your DS with the photos yet? I’ve been waiting for many, many years?

[DeathinparadiseNo1fan]

Hahahaha
I remember this!
Are you still a member @FrannyandZooey
OMG 😂

[Heckler]

Francis!!!

How bloody marvellous to see you!

(You would know me as NormaStanley etc, but have name changed to honour a slightly drunken act earlier this week)

[FrannyandZooey]

Can't believe ds's clay cock made the legendary threads list. I'm not convinced the actual thread is the funniest ever, but I admit the photo is quite something.

I have some sad news for people, though. Please sit down before reading any further. The clay cock sadly passed away a few months ago. We had left it in a long forgotten corner of the house and when, in a fit of tidying, we unearthed it again, it had lost its proud stature and been reduced to a pile of rubble. I know. It was a tragic day sniff We gave it a good send off in the rubbish bin

I am however pleased to report that my fabulous ds1 is now nearly 12, and, while not exactly what I would call normal, has never shown any signs of repeating his phallic sculpture phase.

Anyway. waves I don't know if anyone remembers me, but, hello, and a very Happy Birthday to MN.

[georgiad]

OMG
OMFG
LOL
LMAO
ROLF
This is so funny I'm running out of acronyms!!!!!!!!!

[FrankUnderwood]

If he was 5 at the time (2008), he's now 11. Perhaps time to show him a photo, in a pre-puberty sex ed chat?

[ALKN]

We were invited to our vicar's house for marriage preparation, and shown into his study, where there was a child's clay sculpture of a baby's hand gripping a grown-up's finger with the words 'I love you Daddy' underneath. Sweet, only it didn't look like a finger, thus lending an altogether sinister tone to the artwork.

[pigletmania]

great photo, how old is your ds?

[AitchTwoOh]

ROOOOOOFFFFFFLLLLLLLE at emmajane's ds's large clay cock.

[AmberLeaf]

Hilarious! bless him!

EllenJane...love the 'moneybox' !!!

[Granny23]

One of the best threads ever. Is (are?)Franny and Zooey still on mumsnet? I always used to rush to read their posts and was never disappointed.

[EllenJaneisnotmyname]

This thread is sooo weird. My DS1's clay, varnished 'moneybox' picture is on my profile page, please look.

[Dontbugmemalone]

Ah that picture made me

Funniest thing I've seen in a while.

[Summerbird73]

i too was wondering about the little 8yo boy now - it is getting close to humiliation time!

[MrsDistinctlyMintyMonetarism]

brilliant thread. Just genius.

[lionheart]

I think you should encourage his natural talent. One day you may well be invited to the opening of his first sculpture exhibition and it will be an amazing sight!

[startail]

I shall set about my house work with tears of laughter on my cheeks.

[SeaShellsHasSandInHerShoes]

How did I miss this first time around?! hilarious

One wonders what he is making now 3 years on with an 8 year olds imagination compared to a 5yo. The mind boggles!

[rockinhippy]

I read "Clock" too - sorry no advice, but thanks for the laugh
:)

[SoupDragon]

Funnily enough, I was thinking of this thread as I admired the display of clay beanstalks DD and her reception classmates had made. Another mother and I exchanged looks and sniggered.

Some look like kinky vibrators with nobbly bits on the sides but there is one which is erect, bare and proud.

[Crosshair]

great thread!

[Summerbird73]

OMG have just been directed to this, i am at work feeling v poorly and sorry for myself and now my colleagues are looking at me all odd as i am crying laughing (discreetly obv). How the hell did i get away with looking at a pic of a clay cock at work!

[SkylineDrifter]

This thread is fab! Having a bit of a sad day and this has cheered me right up!

[Disenchanted3]

Hahhahaha AGAIN!