My feed

to access all these features

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Lone parents

Any single parents in north london?

57 replies

honeypot01 · 09/04/2005 12:40


Anyone want to meet in north london? I'm in Enfield and have a 3 year old little boy. I'm available Thurs and Fri as i work Mon-Wed. Could take kids to local swimming pool or ball park. Be nice to meet some local single parents! Please can i have some replies! Hope to hear from some of you soon!

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 11/04/2005 22:26

Hi mate,

i am in Hatfield which is just past pottersbar, so not to far if you want to meet after my little munchkin comes along ( at some point over the next couple of weeks when he feels like it!!!!!!!!)

honeypot01 · 11/04/2005 22:38


How u? Bet you can't wait for the baby to come! is it your first? You'll be fine, don't worry about it. i have a 3yr old lil boy.

When you've got over the birth would love to meet up with you. Do you know what your having, chosen any names? Good luck, hope all goes well. Have you got a birth partner. Hope to chat soon

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 12/04/2005 01:28


i am really excited now - very scared though too. I am having a little boy and i have picked ciaran sean for his name. I dont have a birth partner so its gonna be tough but ill get through it. Meeting up would be wicked. Will be nice to meet some other mums.

honeypot01 · 12/04/2005 12:58

Hi Pretty fly, thats a nice name - irish! My son is called Jordan Luis, Jordan is my mums family name. The midwives are very good, im sure you'll be looked after. What hospital are you going to, is it QE2 or Barnet General up there? I had my son at Chase Farm in Enfield. When the little one due? Have you got any family or relatives that could be a birth partner? Would be great when you've settled once Ciaran has arrived and your settled into motherhood! I dont drive but i know a straight bus goes from Enfield - Potters Bar. Jordan loves swimming at the mo, i take him classes in Enfield, was going to try some under 5 sessions at Furzefield Centre. When you're little one's had all the jabs maybe you'd like to join us in the water! a way off yet i know. Anyway give us a shout to let us know the good news and we'll arrange to met up. Good luck, hope all goes well for you. You can mail me on [email protected] if you want to. We're arranging on another thread onb the lone parents a holiday away in the summer with little ones if you would be interested.

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 12/04/2005 14:58

actually that would be very cool. I will be taking him swimming so i will look forward to that. I like the name you picked too. There is no way of getting a birth partner. My best friend was supposed to be there then when i called in night to say gone into premature labour she told me she couldnt come as she was at boyfriends and had to go to work next day, so i have kinda given up on that idea. She did apologise but just really not up for relying on her again. A holiday is a great idea. I have had a nightmare trying to find somewhere suitable. I will be at qe2. Delivery seem fantastic but post/ante natal are MEAN.

honeypot01 · 12/04/2005 19:14

aah you poor thing! hope all goes well for you, im sure you'll be fine. Have you got everything ready for when he decides to arrive? i've just got back from work, just logged on to check my mails. on the holiday thread think might be a week to center parks or butlins or maybe a week abroad, whatever's the better deal. If you're interested have a look. I think they're looking at 1st week of Julyish. Whens baby due? How old r u? I'm 27. Do you live on your own, is it going to be hard to get to hospital when you're in labour? Sorry for questions. Hope all goes well and would love to meet up once your settled with baby!

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 12/04/2005 19:22

i am twenty three the day my baby is due, i do live on my own. In the process of moving into my new place at the moment - just waiting for the keys. I cant wait to get in there and start building a little home for him.

What do you do for work - i miss being there so much and i have only been on leave for a week and a bit!!!!!! I never thought i would hear myself say that i can tell ya!!!!

Dont worry about the questions - its nice to have someone to talk to. I will look at the holiday thread. Obviously i have to look at money etc. but its definately something i will be considering.

honeypot01 · 12/04/2005 19:38

Be nice to have same bday as your baby!! Where are you moving to, same area?

I work for an architect co in west end p/t. Will you be going back to work do you think? What do you do?is here you wont have time to even think about being there, just enjoy the time you'll have with him! You'll love it! I think il check money before booking anything too but see what comes up, even if its a wk away to Butlins, be nice to meet some single parents too as dont know any! all my friends are married!

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 13/04/2005 11:56

it will be nice in some ways - everyone will forget my birthday though!!! l.o.l how much of a brat am i!!!!!

I work in publishing. Not sure if i am going back or not. thinking about going freelance as well as college two days a week. Makes it easier on child care costs. I will still be living in the same area, just moving to a lovely big new house which is my absolute pride and joy - it has a big garden and everything. Perfect for when you have a little boy knocking about!!

My friends are all men hence why it will be nice to meet other single parents. After my disaster of an ex i tend to be funny around married people. Not really that bad but its still not a nice feeling.

honeypot01 · 13/04/2005 12:10

hiya! u buying renting? i rent a 2 bed flat, will probably buy it next year thou, if have enough funds. If you earn under £30k you will be entitled child tax credit which will pay for childcare costs, mine cobvers all of Jordans nursery fees, plus you'll get Working Tax Credit.

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 13/04/2005 21:46

yeah been looking at that to try and make things easier on myself. Really gonna struggle otherwise. I am renting. Its a lovely house and i will buy it but not for a few years yet. Sounds like you are pretty sorted - were you on your own from the beginning, did you find it hard at first???

honeypot01 · 13/04/2005 21:55

hi hun!
How u tonite? im still trying to get Jordan to sleep, been in bed since 8pm, read him about 5 books and still not asleep! He knows that tomorrow is swimming day and gets too excited! I split with Jordan's dad when he was 20 mths old, don't see him anymore, a lot easier without the hassle and Jordan has plenty of male company around so not like he's lacking there, better of without him. Is it a council property you got? i've got a 2 bed council flat, really nice one thou not on an estate, im in a purpose block, my dad has done it all up for me. Im hoping to get a new bathroom suite in by the summer! Most of the people here have bought theirs, i can buy mine this yr, but thought if i wait till nxt yr or yr after il get more discount. Will you be having any help from anyone when you get home or will it just be you and baby? It was fine at first, all the baby wants is sleep, milk, baths and love. Its when you're up every few hrs for feeds, but you soon ghet used it! Do you think baby's going to come early?

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 14/04/2005 14:10

Hi mate,

i hope he doesnt come early, i really want to go to term. My baby sister just had her first one yesterday -( shse is twenty one and married so not really a baby but still). He is so gorgeous and i cant wait for mine but i would like the house to be sorted out first, otherwise the upheaval could be a bit of a bugger. Your block and flat sounds lovely. I had a one bed flat till recently and it is awful - criminals next door who party all night and damp and all sorts. Would have moveed out straight away but got pg so had to sit and wait for the house. So pleased because its so much more tehn i expected and i am looking forward to building a home for me and my baby son. It might sound a bit strange but i want to prove i can provide a really good life for him. His father told me i would never cope and although i am scared i am also determinedc to do my best by him - did you feel like that, do you have a good rel. with your ex dp?

Hope he got to sleep eventually. He sounds like a right little character.

honeypot01 · 14/04/2005 14:36

aah lovely, so your an auntie now! be nice for the babies to be so close in age, do you see her much? my ex always told me that i was a good mum, never put me down like that, but always said that he was a crap dad which has turnwed out too be true as don't see anything of him anymore, i see some of his family thou. he doesnt even keep in touch with them so not just me!! were you in council, if so how did you get a hse?? we've just got back from toddler swimming and McDonalds after for a treat for Jordan. Tomorrow going to storytime at library in morning. you'll be just fine, just do whats best for baby as long as he's got all he needs everything will be just fine.

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 14/04/2005 19:13

i hope so. Like i said scared but i cant wait really. I just want to do a good job with him.. I know from my own parents that its so easy to cock up. I want him to have everything i didnt and i never want him to feel like he has missed out not having a dad. Its good that you get on with your ex. I would love to have a better relationship with mine but every time i have let him anywhere near my life he has done so much damage. I cant afford to let him do it to my son as well.

It sounds like you have both had a really lovely day. So looking forward to doing that stuff with my little monkey, seeing them have fun and enjoy themselves seems to make up for any amount of sleepless nights. Re: the council, they had to move me anyway because its too small but i just got lucky with the house. I had a fight though, i had to report everything my neighbours did for months and phone them every day as well as letters from doctors etc. saying how bad for me the stress was. When i first got pg and refused to abort the ex said he would hurt me and the baby if i named him and strangely that helped my case - if he is a risk etc. He isnt at all he is a big pussy cat and he would certainly never hurt the baby, he was just trying to scare me to make sure he got away with it. NOt nice at time but helped in the long run.

Me and my sister are really close, she lives in st albans so hopefully the babies will be really close as they get older.

God this message is ages long - keep you busy(er) Its nice to have someone to talk to about it all

honeypot01 · 14/04/2005 19:40

hiya! I think i've got a quiet evening tonight, must have worn my lil man out, he wanted to go to bed at 6pm , without dinner! very strange, all that swimming1
i think u must've muisread about my ex, i dont have any contact with him anymore, dont get no money nothing, i changed my mobile no. cos he kept hassling me through the night, esopecially when he found out was seeing someone, he wasnt happy about him being in the same house as his son - whatever i say! but the guy soon got pissed off and he got his way, not that ewasier to good men when ur a single parent thou, got to keep getting babysitters! i go out but not as much as i did pre- Jordan times!! i used to be a right little clubber not no more!

Wot u got a 2 or 3 bed hse? lucky thing!! U been up2 anything exciting today? had to phone tax credits today they paid in £100 less child tax credit than were supposed to, turns out that they sent a new award to me in March with new amounts, theres me thinking i could use that money to save for new bathroom! damn! So when i eventually receive new award notice gotta tell council tax and housing benefit people again, that my money has gone down again, keeps mucking up all the time. Everytime it changes gotta keep telling em, really pisses me off cos u gotta wait ages! sorry to moan, i hate all these people they dont know what they're on about half the time!! Have a nice eve, u off out anywhere?

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 15/04/2005 13:10

i dont really go anywhere at the moment, on bed rest cause of the baby - god he sounds like a right prat!!!!

Why do they do that whole "not paying" thing. Surely they must know they are being bastards and they cant feel good about it. When they meet new women do the women go - oh you hav e achild you dont pay for - what an attractive trait - I got rid of someone after three months when i found that out so i doubt it. Bloody men.

I know i really am lucky, its a two bed but they are both double rooms and its so big that space just isnt a problem. Its one of those big old nineteen fifty type semi things so its really sturdy adn loads can be done to it.

Tax credits and finances are just a pain in the arse really, why cant a simpler system be introduced where if one changes they alert all the others?

Hoep your ok - are you and little one doing anything today??

honeypot01 · 15/04/2005 14:01

not doing anything too much today, was going to take Jordan syorytime but he wasn't interested in going toay. Went down to travel agents to get some holiday brochures, really need a hol!! some girls on the thread 'single parent holidays' are looking to go away so i thought get an idea of prices. went for lunch with Jordan after and just my luck it started raining! im going to opticians later cos my driving instructor keeps telling me that i cant read no. plates from required distance and i wont be able to take test if i cant read it, so going with my mum when she finishes work to go choose glasses, just for driving and comp thou! do u drive? doing anything today?

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 15/04/2005 21:15


i am learning at the moment as well. I was supposed to take my test back in october but was too sick with the pregnacy to take it. Had to retake theory a couple of weeks ago after it expired which i passed so looking frwrd to test day at moment. Gonna book it again for after baby is born. Glasses can look hot-very intelligent and proffessional. I loved storytime when i was a kid so looking forward to taking the baby too that. Not well so other then that just watching god awful tv and trying to persuade myself not to work.

honeypot01 · 16/04/2005 08:52


I took my test last April was so nervous all the way through that i failed. Got to pass before xmas, thats when theory runs out! have u got everything ready for when baby comes or still gotta get stuff? I'm going up to Cheshunt today shopping with my mum then looking for these glasses so better go and get ready. Don't worry about doing it alone, you'll be just fine, if i can do it im sure you can, donty let anyone tell you otherwise, be strong. Hope you have a nice weekend.

Beth x

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 16/04/2005 16:21

hi beth,

i am sure you will pass fine next time. I hope so - bit scary but i will get there. I have pretty much everything - been buying it since day one so have caught up now really. Just waiting for him!!!!

Have a nice time shopping,

honeypot01 · 16/04/2005 18:24


You'll be just fine. We had so much stuff, we bought a moses basket, a cot bed and a cot for my mums house. He slept in moses basket a bit but mostly slept on me in the first few months when woke in night, he must've gone in cot bed all of about 6 times and the cot well hardly ever! Such a waste of money, thankfully sold them all thou. He generally slept with me a lot, when he was 2, we got him his own bed, surprisingly enough he went straight into it and has been fine! Don't spend too much thou, i know theres lots to buy, but half the stuff they sell you don't even need! (Sorry i dont mean to sound like your mum, just i bought so much stuff when Jordan was born which didnt need).

Went shopping this morning was a nightmare, he wanted to walk and decided he wanted to play hide and seek, so kept running round the shops, then he ran away. My mum decided to play a trick on him and hide went on for about 15 mins, we thought he'd learn a lesson and not run away but when he found us he thought we were playing too! So didnt manage to get any glasses so im going to go when he's at nursery next week, got 2 days hols from last year that i needed to use up, so thats 2 days peace!

Hows your day been, u been busy? The waiting seems to go on forever doesnt it? I was in and out of hospital 5 times before i actually went into labour they kept telling me i wasnt dilated enough! Where i was living before, the girl upstairs from me was clubbing, at 9 mths preggas! and her waters broke on the dancefloor, silly girl but how embarrasing!

Anyway, better go, my little mans asking for his dinner. Chat later x

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 16/04/2005 18:30

oh my god i dont think i would have the energy for the cue to go into the club never mind actually get down and dance. I have been in three times so jsut waiting now.

He sounds like a right little character. I probably sound mental but i am looking forward to that stage with the baby. I want a lively little terror (god help me).

Do you find it difficult to work and spend time with youre little and balance finances - i think thats what i am most worried about at the moment?

honeypot01 · 16/04/2005 18:46


Its pretty much ok, as i work Mon-Fri i have the rest of the wk with Jordan, on Thursday mornings we go swimming, finding something regular at mo for Fridays, think i've found a preschool gynmastic thing thou.

Financially, im ok, got 3 credit cards to pay off so thats my main worry! My nursery gets paid by child tax credit so thats not a worry and i get some housing and council tax ben (hardly anything so i wouldnt even count it) dont even know why they bother giving it, its about £2 or something ridicculous like that! Don't get to go out in eves as much as i used to thou, i do have backup for babysitting but sometimes can be financially bit hard, but do gety to go out every now and again. I'm going out next Fri and Sat, and going to Brighton for a weekend.

It really isnt that bad! Your worrying about nothing, you'll be just fine as long as you do't impulse buy which i am dreadful at!!!Depending on your income you'll get the WTC as long as your below £30K. What was your job? r u going back to the same one? When i went into hospital i had this midwife with the false nails on, and she kept saying i wasnt dilated enough, i told her she prob couldn't feel anything with the nails! they were so long! Just given Jordan his dinner, we made pizza earlier, bought the base and did our own topping, its nice at this age, he loves making cakes and everything now, has to be helping all the time!

OP posts:
prettyfly1 · 17/04/2005 15:18

ahhh bless. i have been to car boot sale and bought him some bargain clothes for when he is a little bit bigger. Also bought some bits for new place but managed to show some restraint(just - impulse buying is probably my biggest problem as well )

Brighton sounds fun - who are you going with. I will miss my groups holiday this year but things should be getting back to normal next year and i can look at it then.

I was a project manager for a publishing house. I miss it really badly at the moment but think i am going to college in september so will probably freelance at my job.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.