My XP is complaining that he has seen DD for half an hour more than his allocated time, over the course of a fortnight and....

[Aimsmum]

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Aimsmum, do not give him your bank account details.

Aw your poor DD, hopefully she will be oblivious to the fact her father is a fucking arse.

Don't give him your bank details - the wanker

What a toerag, Aimsmum.

I agree - don't let him have those details.

What a tosser! I believe what goes around comes around and one day when she's old enough, she'll realise what he's like and have nothing to do with him! And he'll turn into a lonely bitter old man.

Dont give your bank details to him.
He will make himself look a right bastard, glad your well rid of him

Tell his mother

Oh, how HORRIBLE he sounds. DO you think he really means it, or is he just saying it to upset you?
If he really means it I would seriously reconsider the contact. Make a note of this in case you need to. The stuff about not giving her food is so unpleasant. Do you have a solicitor?

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What a pathetic specimin he is.
hopefully his fatherly instinct prevails when he is actually out with he and he does, in fact, buy her drinks etc.
But he us having a childish tantrum with you.

Tell him to tell his debt manager to contact your solicitor for any info genuinely needed, and you will be happy to comply if your solicitor advises you that it is ok. That will shut him up. I can't believe (in a million years) that this person needs your bank account number - what would he do with it? Without a personal signed mandate from you he can't access it or any info about it!

won't have to wait too long if he carries on the way he is...I would be very tempted to stop contact...how old is your DD?

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I agre with Aloha - keep a record of this kind of unreasonable threat about not caring properley for your dd.

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Well if he doesn't care for her properly, not a court in the land would grant him unsupervised access....so you can stop access and tell him to take you to court - so keep records and a diary of events.

Your poor DD

what a sack of shit this excuse for a 'man' is!

What a twunt of the highest order.

I agree with Aloha keep records of this type of behaviour.

Don't give your bank details

When DD goes out with him is possible to send her with emergency supplies. A box of juice or two and a museli/cereal bar for example. Then she has something to snack on and he doesn't get the opportunity to get one over on you IYKWIM

All thew best with it...bloody men

Oh and didn;t he want to change his allocated day?

Don't be nice and let him do that again.

What a w***! doesn't he realise that there are guys out there fighting to spend more time with their kids? He should feel privileged to see her at all.

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If he's a gambler I imagine the thing about the debt manager is a lie - he may well just be trying to trick you into revealing your bank a/c details.

I hope the stuff about not providing food and drink for his own daughter is just an empty threat. But I'd keep a record of it just in case.

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I think the most satisfying thing you could do here is be the better person by ignoring it as much as possible. So don't rise to it, don't give him any details, don't show you're upset by any of it, just calmly only deal with him as much as you have to and show absolutely no reaction to anything else. Make sure you don't let it get to you. Could you almost make a game of it with yourself, seeing how aloof you can be?

He sounds vile but let's hope the food etc is empty threats designed to rile.

And definitely keep a record of all of it. So just don't react and then calmly write it down. He's the loser if he doesn't spend time with her.

Can you somehow get him to put it in writing - email, maybe, or text message? that he is refusing to pay for food/drinks/snacks for his daughter when she is with him, and that he is not planning to feed her or pay for any activities etc? Surely the court would be interested to hear this.

The OP made me so angry my throat felt constricted. Heartless weirdo.

So sad for your dd ( and you!)

some good advice on here. Agree with www - rise above it but keep notes!