Are the Dutch simply the rudest and least professional people in Europe?

[dikkertjedap]

Just wondering ....

I find the treatment of customers in many shops simply shocking. Shop assistants seem to have to chew gum and are attached either to their mobile or chatting away with other cashiers or a friend and will let you wait quite happily. If you dare to say 'Excuse me ..' they will actually tell you 'I am busy, I will help you when I have time'.

For many personal services you have to pay, even if you cannot make it or they cannot make it. For example, if swimming lessons fall on Christmas Day or New Year's Day, there won't be a lesson but you still have to pay. If you want to cancel because of Holidays, you still have to pay. This seems with all sports, at least where I am based.

If faulty goods (or no goods) are delivered then it is the customers' fault. BY DEFINITION. It is never the provider, NEVER EVER.

People seem to be full of themselves, think they know a lot, whereas in many cases it simply makes you cry or laugh. Many pretend to have qualifications and it turns out they don't. So you pay a premium and then find out they are fully unqualified. Clearly no inspections whatsoever.

If a child falls of a climbing frame at school, it will take a considerable time for a staff member to come over, stroke the child over the head and tell it: 'So, now all okay, go and play'. No checks for bumps, no ice, no letter to parents.

Many parents to not seem to use car seats/booster seats (I thought it was EU law?). So at childrens' parties they are all bundled in a car, 8 on the rear seat, no seat belts, no seats.

Mind you, at my local Dutch Ikea store you can get tampons or sanitary towels, in case you need them, but don't forget they are called: female hygiene napkins. Don't dare to point out that this is slightly incorrect, because they will laugh in your face and tell you they are fluent English.

Not what I expected.

Rant over.

[Naoko]

We do like the Brits! Our weather is terrible so we don't tend to get the worst of your drunken holiday antics, your tv shows are funny, and you love football as much as we do

There is a difference between directness and rudeness. There are rude Dutch people and direct ones; these things don't necessarily overlap. Some of the directness might be taken for rudeness by British people as it's not what they expect; similarly when I first came here I found the British inability to say 'yes' or 'no' without twenty minutes of beating around the bush incredibly rude (and it still drives me nuts but I have at least realised these people are not trying to insult me and thus I no longer assume them to be rude). There's arseholes everywhere. There's also cultural differences. Goodie - your colleague was rude. I'd never tell a colleague to dye their hair, unless they asked if I thought they should - then I might say yes, if I thought it'd look better, because I assume they want an honest answer. And even then I'd say 'yes, I think that would look nice' rather than 'yes, if you don't dye it you will look ten years older than you are and frighten small children'.

[crunchbag]

Oh Naoko, I do so agree with you on the British inabilitiy to say just yes or no without going round in circles.

splinters we do like the Brits! (DH is English and I live here in the UK) Not sure if it has anything to do with the war though. British tv series are hugely popular in Holland and we are united in our 'hatred' for the German football team

Internet shopping in Holland is rubbish as is trying to use a credit card or trying to buy a bus/train ticket these days. And don't start me on the bureaucracy

[dikkertjedap]

crunchbag - why is internet shopping rubbish? Would like to know, because I think that is the way forward (avoiding rude shop assistants and bad service/bad products). So far I have ordered a few things from the UK which all arrived speedily and in good condition. Only problem was with Monsoon where on top of the UK price they put something like 20% BTW. None of the others have done that so far.

[Dromedary]

I've noticed that "direct and honest" thing in Germans and Scandinavians too.
I tend to think of the English being quite rude and unhelpful. But a trip to Germany can be a real eye-opener.

[MordionAgenos]

The Dutch definitely like me.

[MordionAgenos]

Hup Hup!

[natation]

Aside the direct/rude debate,

who finds it acceptable for anyone to push into a queue you've been waiting in at the supermarket to pay and decided they are in front of you?

who finds it acceptable for children to push past strangers with an "I'm the only important one" attitude?

[Naoko]

Well, it isn't but that happens to me in Britain all the time too...

[garlicbaubles]

All of you in the UK who think that the UK can be bad, well, think again.

I agree with this, at least Some Western Europeans go a good line in rudeness, but some of their Eastern neighbours take it to a whoooole new level. On the up side, you can sometimes achieve something approaching the service you're paying for by shouting, loudly and as rudely as possible, in German.

It's a fascinating world, innit

[splintersinmebum]

Glad to hear the Dutch like us .

[natation]

I have NEVER had anyone push in front of me in a supermarket queue in the UK, or Germany, or even France. I've had it happen to me several times in Netherlands and maybe once a year in Belgium.

Our children have friends which I'd say are 50/50 Belgian / International, they are all fluent francophones. There is a big difference in their behaviour when they stay over to play and sometimes sleepovers. The Belgian kids seem to go crazy, like they have such a strict time combined at home and school that outside these constraints, they go mad. We took a group of 12 out before Christmas, 6 Belgian, 6 international, I was quite embarassed at their behaviour and some cow in the crowds said (so everyone could hear) "what savages those girls". I had to agree with her.

[crunchbag]

dikkertjedap for me living in the UK, there are only a few shops I can use that accept credit cards. With the ones I have used, delivery and service have been great. But if you live in Holland you can use iDEAL so it shouldn't be a problem

I am stingy and like to avoid the delivery costs that UK shops charge for shipping abroad.

[Muminwestlondon]

Splintersinmebum,

As far as I am aware Dutch people regard Canadians and US soldiers as having liberated them from the Nazis (at least my family). When I was growing up in the late sixties and seventies, the British were objects of ridicule because of a perceived obsession with previous glories and empire. My Mum's generation who were children during WW2, survived the hunger winter etc are now all elderly and many must have died by now. My Mum was psychologically scarred by her experiences and still has an almost pathological hatred of Germans, but it is a different world now. We often went to the beach at Schevenigen when we visited Holland when I was a child, a German guy drowned and people were saying so what it was a bloody German.

Of course the Dutch think of themselves as the best country in the world .

[Bluestocking]

I went to a conference in Copenhagen earlier this year and found the service in restaurants etc unbelievably, ahem direct. The first instance was a bit of a shock but after that it was just funny! Might be a bit wearing if you actually had to live there though.

[LookBehindYou]

Swings and roundabouts. I'm a Brit living overseas and without exception the rude and loud child acting inappropriately is ALWAYS a Brit.

The Dutch guy who 'joked' about a posters dad dying was just very very odd. I don't think that 'joke' can be attributed to a nation.

The colleague sitting nearest to me is Dutch and she's a great girl. Intelligent and funny.

I generally find the Dutch confident which the British translate as being arrogant. I don't know Holland very well but have never had bad customer service whereas where I live it's rife. The pushing in front, not noticing that you were the first in the bus queue even though you're the 7th to get on the bus is just how it seems to be in most European countries. We are obsessed with our queues though aren't we?

[MordionAgenos]

The Danes can be direct to the point of rudeness but personally I love them.

[garlicbaubles]

natation's list was funny and fairly accurate, ime. It's not actually wrong to describe a cultural propensity in brief, you know, and certainly not racist.

I'm another one who loves Belgium for being just like home, with better food!

[LookBehindYou]

Naoko your post reminded me of my German colleague's complaint that it's really hard to spot a polite English 'no'

[garlicbaubles]

I fell foul of polite 'No's in Brazil - they require even more bush-beating than Brits do! "Sorry, but it's not what I wanted" is rude. You have to go a bundle on how it would be what I wanted under other circumstances, possibly define what those circumstances might be, then solemnly undertake to come back for that very thing as soon as the circumstance arises.

Leaving a group takes at least 20 minutes - it's best to start about 40 mins before you actually want to leave, to allow for the lengthy rituals of everyone begging you to stay, acting as though your loss is a tragedy for the others, your similar despair at having to leave, sitting back down and having a last few minutes, turning the conversation back to how you must go, then fulsome good wishes for everyone's continued stay and your journey away, effusive thanks and multiple promises to meet again soon.

I LOVE it!!!

[Mu1berryBush]

@ heyhoherewego, boring for the rest of them, but here goes. Friend in the hotel industry told me that dubliners have a reputation amongst belfast hotel staff for sending things back. Really? i thought being a dubliner.... i would have thought standards in belfast similar to dublin. We went to the culloden on a break, the same friend had a great deal and the hotel itself was gorgeous. But we had to send back cold food, bland food, INSTANT COFFEE, I'M NOT KIDDING. And the belfastonians were raising their eyes to heaven at us saying 'are yuh frum dublan?'

[Mu1berryBush]

ps, not in the culloden itself, i mean we sent food bac in various cafes and restaurants in belfast.

[Emmis]

This post made me laugh!! This is my fourth time living in the Netherlands and I have to be honest, they are getting a bit better, smiling more and actually looking at you in the eye, but they are most definitely prize winners when it comes to refusing to accept any responsibility, and finding it impossible to ever admit they are wrong. I haven't lived in every country on planet Earth but I've lived in a good few across Europe (North and South) as well as Down Under, and they definitely win, hands down, for irresponsibility. "Not possible", and a general air of ambivalence, drives them. However, they're not mean. They just don't seem to give a toss! It can be a good experience in letting go, not overly worrying, especially when raising kids, and is a complete extreme to the child worship that is experienced in more Southern European countries. I just think it depends on your own personality as to whether it gets under your skin. Personally, I'm not very thick skinned, so it does get to me. Yes, for a Dutch person, I would be too sensitive. But hey ho, I'm moving to Spain!

If you can laugh it off with other foreigners or more understanding locals then I find that helps!

[drjohnsonscat]

There's a lot of 'not possible' across N Europe. When I lived in Belgium we used to keep a daily tally in the office of the number of 'alors ca, non, ce n'est pas possible' complete with a finger wagging and a slight tut that we had encountered that day. For example when collecting 5 shirts from a dry cleaners :

Can I have a bag please?

< tutting and finger wagging> Alors ca non. This is not a shop, Madame.