Die Kaffeestube Teil 2 - virtual Kaffeeklatsch in Germany and Austria

[cheaspicks]

Chat for those living in a German-speaking country, or anyone else who is interested.

DH has just come back from viewing a house. He said it was pretty much perfect but the big snag is its not available untill november/december maybe even later as the tenant is looking for somewhere to buy but hasnt found anywhere yet. Its so disapointing as we need to move asap because this place is expensive and DHs work is paying the rent but only for 3 months which runs out october. Also all our things are in storage which we obviously have to pay for and to be honest we need our things. The DDs are moaning all the time cause they dont have their things.
Oh well back to square one. Sorry for the long rant.

Nutella we got the rabbits when the kids were too young to really have an opinion - DD was about 10 months and the boys not born when we got the first, and the 2nd was an accidental acquisition, although we had been advised by the RSPCA to get him a female companion :) When we go on holidays we ask friends of the kids (and their mums) to look after the rabbits - and now both the families we ask have rabbits too! They are a little bit of a cop out pet as they are less work than dogs (not sure if they are less work than cats). My parents always had dogs and cats, but they over indulge them and feed them rich tit-bits they shouldn't have, leading to them being rather unpleasantly smelly so they put me off getting dogs and cats. DD wants a dog though, and we foolishly told her when she was 4 that she could have one when she was 8 - and that is fast approaching now! My parents also had chickens and decided it would be "good for" us children to be responsible for them - skidding on frozen chicken sh** in their run on the way to break the ice on their drinking water early on winter mornings before school is an abiding childhood memory I don't relish - I always think "Don't do it" when people think getting a few chickens is a lovely idea!

wanting more that is frustrating - it is very hard finding places available immediately, which si part of the reason we ended up living way out in the sticks in a tiny village/ hamlet I had said a condition of moving here was that I wanted to be in a proper small town...

Englishwoman ahahahahahahahaha! Ahem, so sorry, but I can imagine skidding on chicken shit would stay with you a long time!

Wanting ah, I can understand your problem, usually here you have to give three months notice before you move out so you might find this problem quite often if there are people in a property. Also I know it's rubbish being without your things, when I first moved here we knew we would be moving again soon from south to north (about 500kn) so didn't move all my stuff south and I had to live without it for a bit over 7months in the end. Was really frustrating!

Will keep my fingers crossed for you!!
Is there a local paper where you can place an advert? Do you know someone who could help you with that and perhaps taking phone calls?

wantingmore I would have thought being able to move in short notice could also be an advantage as alot of people are looking for Nachmieter if they already have something else and so want to avoid a month or two of paying double rent. Try walking around the neighbourhood where yu would like to live and see if there are any signs on doors or as nutella said place an ad.

Have you had any more luck with new places yet nutella?

english lol at getting your dd a dog when she's 8!! Dd wants one too and dh said if she gets a grade 1 in maths she can have one and that's never going to happen at this school (even the genius dc in dd's class only got a 2) so he was very clever/evil to have thought that one up!

Our ad finished yesterday in the paper Admylin from the lack of response this time around I'm guessing people are busy on holiday or coming back from holiday....
But, a small flicker of hope! We're off to look at a place in Nordstadt as soon as possible... Although no idea when we might actually move in. Flat isn't available until the start of November (at the very earliest) and the electrics need doing so... The owner sounds reasonably flexible.. If we move in after the electrics are renewed and we can physically manage it I'm guessing February....after bean's arrival...

Thanks for the advice admylin and nutella. I will give it a go.
nutella hope your place works out.

Fair enough, Ploom, I think I just don't write anything interesting enough to be bothered if people find me on here! :)
Thanks anyway re the fireplace!

admylin, great idea, and DH has already offered to make a cardboard one. But did it really look good? Do you have photos of yours? Thanks for the links, not bad! You are very sweet to find those for me. Thank you.
I think the small Amazon one is a close fit, but I will keep searching for now, or have DH make his cardboard one and see how good it is. I am a bit fussy! :)

awesome, hi! Nice blog, I will attempt to read it more when I have some time!

Alice, are you new or a namechanger? (I am using all my strength not to say 'Who The Fck is Alice?'! :)) I really am not keeping up now, this thread moves so fast! Hi either way!

wantingmore, that sucks about the house. I hope you land on your feet soon.

Oh dear, my f * c k didn't work. :)

Aargh, just lost a long post when my battery suddenly died. I don't have time (or the energy) to type it all out again, so a quick summary:

NoHun I know that I'm probably instantly recognisable to anyone who knows me, so just make sure that I don't post anything that I wouldn't mind RL friends or even acquaintances reading. And am just keeping my fingers crossed that my ILs don't discover MN!

Anyway, for those who don't know me, I live in Austria with Austrian DH and our three DC (6, 8 and 10); I've been here for nine years and also lived in Germany for four years.

wanting / Nutella Good luck with the house/flat hunting!

admylin We didn't actually see anything of Hannover as we only spent one full day with our friends and they now live nearer to Nien burg than Hannover. DH and I both thought how English it looked in that area, although our friends didn't think so at all so it's obviously just in comparison with Austria!

EnglishWoman My parents were the exact opposite when it came to pets; we only ever had gerbils and they weren't replaced when they died as the novelty wore off after a few weeks and my mum ended up having to look after them.

Alice Hello, long time no see! You'd be welcome to come over this week if you can get here.

Cake The only time my DH was ever mistaken for an Australian (on a surprisingly regular basis) was when we lived in the USA - and it wasn't because of his accent. And the only nursery rhyme etc. he knows is Alle meine Entlein (which I don't remember him ever singing to the DC).

Ploom At least you have English as your family language. If we're all together, the main language is German - I do still use English if I'm addressing the DC directly, but speak German if it's a family discussion. Not unconnected to that, I don't think the DC hear enough English conversation - but am not sure about exposing them to DH's accent more than is absolutely necessary.

awesome I didn't realise Köpenick was so unfriendly; I used to have a good friend there when I was au pairing in Berlin, but I suppose I didn't actually spend a lot of time in Köpenick itself. I came across my fair share of "direct" Germans when we lived there, but it sounds like your experience is far worse.

Bertie Good luck with your visit! I had a look at your thread, but am not much help as I haven't travelled by train in Germany for years. There's definitely a difference between ICE and IC trains, though (ICE are Intercity Express and are much faster); the ICE supplement used to be twice as much as the IC supplement, but that may well have changed.

Antique at your latest postman-related incident!

So much for a quick summary! Really must go as DS has decided he wants to go to KiGa today, much to my surprise; I'd registered him this week, but expected him to want to stay home with the DDs. Apologies to anyone I've missed out!

Thanks NoHun me too. Hope you manage to get your fireplace sorted.

Hi LinzerTorte thanks for the good luck wishes. Hope your DS has fun at kiga today.

Hope everyone had a good weekend.
We went on an hour tourist boat trip but never again. I get travel sick so took a tablet before hand but still felt really sick so didnt enjoy it at all!! DDs and DH loved it though.
If any one is on fb and wants to add me judt PM me and let me know.
Have a good day everyone♥

Sorry not sure where those last numbers came from

Poor you wanting, that must have been horrible. I used to hate travelling by car as my brother used to get very car sick - it was probably worse for him, admittedly! I'm not sure whether I was already emetophobic back then or whether that was what triggered it.

DS went into KiGa quite happily and I've just dropped the DDs off at DD1's dyslexia tutor (who offers general school preparation during the summer holidays, which DD2 is always desperate to go to and which are very cheap) so I now have to go shopping as we've got virtually no food in the house.

Linzer that's a good idea to get them back into the way of things! I bet it will hit my 2 really hard next Monday when they have to get up at 6:30am again but sitting and concentrating all morning will be the biggest challenge. Ds has already said he thinks he might start having a coffee before he goes out and dd wants me to get her energy drinks (and I won't be getting them) but I told her a healthy breakfast and plenty to drink should do the same trick!

Wanting sorry you couldn't enjoy the boat trip. Travel sickness is awful. My dd needs tablets even for flying as she starts to get ill as soon as teh engines start up. Does your dh's employer not offer any help with flat hunting?

Linzer sorry about the emetophobia i should have thought before posting what i did.
Thats good Ds went happily and the Dds have somewhere to go too thats cheap. I cant wait for DD1 to start school and DD2 to kita they are driving me mad.
Have fun shopping. We have to go get some food shopping too later.

Eeek Linzer school preparation classes! Tell me that's an Austrian thing please??! Getting up in time shouldn't be a problem for my kids, though DD has achieved sleeping in til almost 8am a couple of times since we got home from London, which is a huge lie in by my kids' standards... but getting used to the structure again might be - we still have another 2.5 weeks off though, and will be away on holiday for 9 days of it.

Wanting sorry your boat trip was no fun - guess your DH should take the kids next time and you can sit in a cafe having some peace :)

I was up most of the night with coughing/ wriggling/ vomiting/ unhappy toddler - its just a heavy cold (in August...) but he's miserable with it (and misery loves company, especially between 11pm and 6am apparently) so am downgrading today to a home day, seeing as I can in the holidays, though doubtless the big 2 will have friends turn up in half an hour or so, so I really should get properly dressed...

My kids are 6 (nearly 7, just finished 1st Klasse), 4 (nearly 5, at Kindergarten) and 16 months (home with me) and we live in Bavaria. I dislike the idea of a role call mainly because I know of people who read MN and would recognise me and am not always sure I like the idea of being "spotted" - I'd mainly hate the idea of my mother reading it (though if she didn't like what she read she'd manage not to recognise it as me even if I typed the full names, addresses and dates of birth of the whole extended family I suspect)

oh "englishwoman" - that sounds like you've had a rough night . Can you not send the older 2 to someone else to play rather than them all coming to you today?? Hope you get some rest. My boys have also not mastered the longer sleeping thing regardless of when they go to bed. DD on the other hand is turning it into an art form - she's not been getting up till 11am!!!!! Its driving me mad cause she doesnt want lunch when we eat cause she's just had breakfast. Think I'm going to wake her in a moment only so that I can reclaim my evenings a bit. Hope you have a good holiday - where are you off to?

linzer - school preparation classes? how did you manage to sell that one to the girls?? Glad ds went to kiga - just one less for a morning makes life a bit easier.

wanting - aw that was sad that the boat trip was no fun for you. Life seems really tricky for you at the moment. How do your dc feel about the possibility about going into german schools? Do they speak any German? Hope you get some good news about schools and flats soon.

admylin - are the school holidays in your area a bit later this year? Your 2 are definite teenagers now if they're looking for extra help to keep awake. When did they start drinking coffee? dd has never shown any interest in tea or coffee despite us drinking them regularly.

nutella - you dont seem to having much luck with flats either. Would be quite stressful to move with a tiny baby in tow - well its always stressful so maybe a portable tiny baby would be a good excuse to get your dh to do it all .

As much as I didnt enjoy the heat of last week, I wasnt impressed with our day of non-stop rain yesterday. We didnt go out all day. Thankfully ds2 got a new wii game for his birthday so that and his other birthday presents kept them occupied. But the weather looks better this morning so think the dogs boys need some running about outside today . also need to crack on this week with getting the last bits of school stationary for ds2 and all that ds1 needs. Ds2 needs blackboard pencils in green and yellow. Managed to find the yellow one but no one has a green one. But went into another shop in the town where the school is on saturday and the woman said they would order a box since there would obv be 18 or 19 other dc needing one too. Why do the school not think of speaking to the local shops before the write their lists. (this is my only bug bear about schools here - would be happier to give the school 50? and they could buy it all themselves!)

We have food again and, more importantly, I have a coffee. The girls disappeared over to the neighbours as soon as we got home (who phoned up when we were out wanting to know when we'd be back), so it's strangely quiet here... good preparation for school next week (for me!).

Ploom Blackboard pencils are a new one on me; how much writing/drawing on the blackboard are they all going to be doing?!? They seem to introduce something new onto the lists every year just to confuse me, although at least we've never had any problems getting hold of things.

EnglishWoman Sympathies on your broken night, but well done to your DD on her lie-ins! My three have been regularly getting up at between 6 and 7 am throughout the holidays - right up until today, when DS and DD2 didn't get up until nearly 8 am and I had to wake DD1 at 8.15 am. Just typical; the only time we have to be somewhere by a certain time is the only time they lie in!

Re school preparation, DD1's dyslexia tutor has always offered more general lessons in the last three weeks of the holidays, and DD1 does seem to benefit from doing regular work outside school (even if I do complain a lot about the extra work that DH does with her). DD2 is always quite upset that she can't go to DD1's dyslexia lessons and loves being "allowed" to go with her in the summer, although we're rarely here to send them for more than a week (they're going three times this week, for an hour each time). I wouldn't send DD2 if she was on her own but the two of them love going together and I think it's good for DD1 not to go on her own for once (she must see how much extra work DH does with her and how little he normally does with DD2).

It's fairly common for school children here to do Ferienhefte in the summer holidays; we've tried to get the DDs to do a page of German and a page of maths every day, although it's not always realistic. DD2 actually finished her maths book a few weeks ago but as usual, it's a little more difficult to motivate DD1. It generally seems to be recommended to give children the whole of July off and then get them used to doing bits of school work throughout August so that they build up gradually by September. I remember hearing on the radio not long ago that the summer holidays are far too long and children really need to go back to school after seven or eight weeks as otherwise they really struggle with their concentration when they do go back. I can't see the holidays becoming shorter any time soon, though - they're too long in the summer, and too short the rest of the year.

wanting I know exactly how you feel; I remember being driven mad one August when the DC were at home with me for weeks on end, we had nothing planned and there was no one else around (they could have gone to KiGa but, in a moment of madness, I'd decided to enrol them only in July - when we ended up not being here ). Ever since then, I've tried to make sure that I've planned the holidays a bit better and the last few summers have actually gone by really quickly, despite the fact that school is closed for nine weeks.

No need to apologise re the sickness btw; I have no problems reading about it, just wouldn't particularly want to be there!

admylin Yes, I think that having to sit and concentrate all morning will be the biggest challenge here too. Do your DC have a full morning at school straight away or do they build up to it gradually over the week like they do here? (I thought it might be different once they get to secondary school but no, DD1 has one hour on her first day, two hours on her second...)

ploom never heard of blackboard pencils either! What's wrong with them using good old fashioned chalk provided by the school?

english hope your ds feels better soon.

Linzer no gentle start here, last year they went back and ds didn't turn up home until 3:30pm. I won't know when they'll be home as the new timetable could be until 1pm, 3pm or if they're lucky around 11ish on that day. Guess I'll just plan to be around between those times!

I was about to start writing a post before and then the kitchen fitters rang asking if they could come and photograph the kitchen , so obviously I had to do some remedial cleaning first! They don't know when they'll manage to come, though, so I'll have to keep it clean and tidy all week .

Linzer I also really enjoyed our meet-up last week, even if it wasn't a terribly long one. Maybe we will have to resurrect the Norfolk barn plan .

If it helps you or anyone else to remember my new nn, here's the story behind it: DD was helping me make hoummous last week - putting the ingredients in the food processor and so on, then she ran away when I switched it on because she doesn't like the noise. The next day she was eating the hoummous for lunch and suddenly asked "where are the cheas picks?" I know it's rather bleurgh and un-MNetty to have a cute child story behind one's nn, but I'd been wanting to namechange for a while and couldn't think of anything better!

CakeBump as ploom said, dh speaks English to dd, too, despite not being a native speaker and making some awful mistakes. We intended to do OPOL, but when dd was born dh found himself speaking English to her automatically, so we left it. My IL live in the same town and they've always done a lot of child care, so dd hasn't missed out on German nursery rhymes or ever seemed to be struggling with German. I am surprised that her German still hasn't become better than her English after a year at kiga. I guess as she starts to play co-operatively with the other children she will improve more rapidly.

As EnglishWoman said, it's the best solution for us, in our situation. There are people who believe that each parent must speak their native language or the child's linguistic development will be severely impaired (look on the bilingualism board), but I think the real key is consistency. An American friend of mine took her then 1yo ds to the States for a year (where she spoke German to him to keep it up) and then moved back here (and switched back to English). He has now (age 9) been diagnosed with some sort of language problem, which his speech therapist suspects is related to the multiple moves at a critical stage of language development, but they can't be sure - and he has ADHD as well, so who knows.

Does anyone (admylin, perhaps) know how to harvest coriander seeds? My coriander plants grew amazingly well this summer and now they are covered in seeds. Do I take them off while they are green and dry them somehow, or leave them on the plants for them to dry? I want to re-sow them rather than eat them!

Hello to everyone else!

I guess it is kind of an Austrian thing then Linzer as here in Bayern we only get just over 6 weeks holiday - we couldn't give them July off as they didn't break up til 31st July :) We go back on 13th Sept. I haven't made DD do a single bit of school type work all holiday :) She has only just finished 1st class though, I'm sure there will be holiday homework in later years, and I guess if anything negative is said next parents evening I may have to re-think! I love the break from homework though, I'm sure DD would be utterly sick of school and stage huge rebellions if I made her do homework in the holidays too - I know I would have, and it's hard enough making her do it in term time! DD's English reading has come on well in the break from school though - purely by chance but I think sometimes a break from focussed work helps, as I got a bundle of English books from the English bookswapper website I use, and when they arrived she just picked one out and read it - she has always loved being read to and loved writing her own stories since about age 4.5, but she is reluctant to read books by herself, I think for fear of making mistakes (I never really pull her up on mistakes in her writing but have done on reading when she randomly guesses totally the wrong words), but suddenly she's reading unfamiliar (age appropriate) English books pretty fluently at first sight, which is excellent :)

DD's friend called and she went off to her house down the road - then 5 mins after she left another of her friends called (one she's only seen once this holiday as she lives far enough away to need to be taken and fetched, so I booked her in for tomorrow :) ) so I've just had the boys since 10am. DS2 has been coughing and miserable and I just couldn't get him to nap, so I took them for a walk (DS1 on his bike) and DS2 grizzled on and off for a couple of km, fell asleep for 10 mins, coughed himself awake as soon as we stopped for DS1 to have a play in a playground, and stayed awake all the way home, but has been surprisingly cheerful since... obviously some fresh air and a 10 min nap compensate for a very bad night's sleep if you are 16 months old... The walk cleared my head but I'd rather have a couple of hours nap, or at least have washed the floors while DS2 napped, they are a state but washing floors with an awake toddler is an exercise in futility.

Oh DD has to have 2 blackboard pencils, did last year and has to again for 2nd class - pencil thickness, so chalk wouldn't do at all - for writing on her own little blackboard (30cm by 15cm ish) but I thought that was specific to the youngest children for handwriting practice and holding up the answers to quick fire maths questions, then wiping it clean for the next exercise... I do see the point (English school kids sometimes have wipe clean white boards for the same purpose, but of course they belong to and are handed out by the school in that case). Luckily DD has only needed white blackboard pencils, which are easily found in the stationary shops - I've never seen other colours.

cheaspicks nns with a story behind them are a good thing, I think this type of thread is not very typical of the rest of mn anyway... I don't think my kids' German is better than their English even now, and DD did 3 years of Kindergarten and a year of school and definitely plays co-operatively :) It is hard to tell though for me, as both DD and DS1 speak better German than I do .

I think what language you read to them/ later they read for pleasure in makes a difference, as that is where they get most of their more extensive passive vocabulary - for that reason I wish DH would read to them in German, but he rarely does though they have lots of German books, I just have to hope they'll read novels etc. in German as well as English as they get a bit older, or maybe think of getting a decent German broadsheet or non-trashy "Educational" magazine subscription in German - I have had flyers for the educational type magazines in the past I think but they seem redundant for non readers, might be worth it for DD now or soon though... Any ideas on that Linzer, Admylin, Ploom* or anyone else with school age kids? What do you do to keep your kids German vocabulary expanding beyond the everyday?