Do you eat the same food at the same time as your children - everyday?

[McDreamyGonagall]

This has got me thinking after reading another thread.

I really want to increase the amount of times we do this. DH prefers to eat later as he has quite a late lunch but I feel we are missing out on enjoying time with the children, teaching them manners etc.

We do eat with them 2 or 3 times a week, just not every night. Also I tend to cook something different on the nights we don't eat with them. What do you do?

[CarGirl]

In answer to the op

unfortunately yes, drives us to distractions on the occasions we don't it is heaven!

[haychee]

I look after my friends children once a week and she repays the favour for me once a week so we can go to work. Her dd1 is very fussy, but i told my friend at the outset that when they come to my house, my rules apply and the same for mine when they go to hers. So if her dd1 will not eat what ive given her she will not be allowed anything else (when she usually would at her own house). Her dd1 doesnt like it, but what can i do, i cant change the rules to accomodate her that wouldnt be fair on my two. And guess what she usually eats what i give her after a bit of whining! I dont make it too awful for her though. I dont give her something wierd and wonderful everytime she comes, just a little of something different each time. My friend is ok with this and is actually grateful so her dd1 is eating more varied stuff, also she can use "well you ate it at haychees the other day" type arguement when back at their own dinner table

[hurricane]

Yes I would see preparing a separate meal for one child as a hardship Oblomov and I'd be bloody annoyed if I'd prepared something that a kid wouldn't eat and then that kid encouraged my kids not to eat properly as well. This has happened to me.

[pointydog]

We all like food to be tasty.

So I pay some attention to what the people in this family like and don't like and make meals accordingly.

I do the same for whoever I'm feeding.

If anyone doesn't do that, they have food control tendancies.

[oliveoil]

I did a thread on this a while ago (in Food, my children are shitty shite or something!) so I will retire now

You carry on, I prefer to have a laid back attitude

it all works out in the end imo, I offer food, they eat it or not, have snack later

easy

[pointydog]

I don't think that level of annoyance is healthy

[Brangelina]

Haychee - I do the same with my DD, if she doesn't eat her dinner she gets nothing else. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

There are other contributing factors for certain - I don't know if it's a cultural thing, but we've never had nursery type food in the house, quite simply because we do not eat it and never have, so DD has got used to "normal" food. My SS used to eat only nursery food because that's all his mother ever cooked him, ergo he didn't touch anything else (until I converted him). My DD loves chips, but we never have them at home, but she just accepts it and only ever eats them when out.

I think it probably helps that DP and I are ever so slightly foodie types and like good food and exploring new flavours. DD sees us with say marinated artichoke and nicks it off our plates. I'm not sure how to explain it, but I've nev er pandered to whims and DD eats more variety than many of her contemporaries. Maybe it was just luck, maybe not.

[mslucy]

I'm with you olive.

Who cares as long as snack is healthy and not some shite from Maccy Ds?

[amidaiwish]

oh so you're a teacher
home by 5pm
i don't think you live the same kind of life as most of us really do you hurricane.

and how old are your dcs? old enough to be grating carrots. hardly toddlers.

[haychee]

yes we all like food to be tasty, but if you had a family of 3+more kids all with visiting friends etc all with fussy tastes, would you seriously cook seperately for each one??? God no way, cook one large meal and they can like it or lump it!

[oliveoil]

(mine eat McD's, in fact just this very lunch I have been to change the toys we got at weekend, which they already had, for Shrek babies)

don't all start piling in on Hurricane please, we will be accused of a witchhunt

[Oblomov]

mslucy, maybe you could use the nursery to your advantage. I mean, children often eat those.....brocolli, sweetcorn.. whatever, if all the other children are. Use the nursery and bring in a few more things at home. It might be extremely effective ?

[hurricane]

I would argue that preparing separate meals for separate kids (which are also different from what you prepare for the adults) is as far from laid back as it's possible to be. I would also argue that this is taking on an unnecessary domestic work load. I would also argue that it would encourage faddy eating, attention seeking and manipulation from children and discourage trying new food, being polite and respectful in other people's houses and developing healthy attitudes towards food. I would also point out that Faddy eating, not trying new foods, not eating a range of foods, not eating enough fruit and vegetables is causing an obesity crisis in this country which is growing.

[oliveoil]

I would do a basic tomato pasta sauce

with salad and garlic bread

chilli flakes and parmesan on the table

adults could have theirs spicy
children too if they wanted or they could have it plain

anyone looking forlorn would get asked quietly if they wanted a cheese sandwich

[haychee]

here here hurricane

[pointydog]

I don;t prepare separate meals for everyone and never have. Not necessary. I also don't serve meals people will not like.

Food does not stress me.

[pointydog]

and obesity not an issue either

[haychee]

I find, that someone else will say they too would prefer a cheese sandwich or jam sandwich or chocolate spread sandwich, until i end up making them all something different and the original meal goes untouched. And, they probobly wont eat the sandwich well either.

[Polyjuicegara2]

Yep always eat together and have to say I love it. Fantastic opportunity to just eat and chat together - miss it when on the odd occasions it doesn't happen, fortunately this is very rare.
Dont understand why folk don't like it - am I missing something? DD1 very good eater, dd2 very, very baaaad!! But she's full of energy (if a leeetle thin) and she IS growing so she must be eating something .

[mslucy]

Oblomov.

that's a good point.

I think what I was trying to see is that ds is very fickle in his tastes - it's not that he won't eat things full stop, just that I'm never quite sure which way he's going to go.

I'll make something that's usually a winner and he'll push it away - other times I'll hit him with something more oscure and he'll stuff his face.

he's just a toddler.

To be honest, dh is probably worse - a vegetarian who doesn't like vegetables (unless heavily disguised).

At least ds loves fruit and drinks his milk without a fuss, which is probably why he's big and strong and tall for his age.

Now if he was fading away, I might feel differently.

[haychee]

Im afraid its one meal for all, like it or lump it when you go to haychees.

[Oblomov]

Oliveoil - that menu is ds's perfect meal. Can we come round for lunch please . It sounds so yummy at your house.
When we go down to Devon, my best friends mum loves feeding ds. It is astisfying when your guests gobbel it all up and then say " fank u, it was delc-ius-"

[iota]

By iota on Thu 27-Apr-06 10:13:04
I have one fussy and one brilliant eater. I think they were born like it. Both went F/T to the same day nursery from the age of 6 months and were treated in the same way there, i.e. no pandering to fussiness, peer pressure and all that stuff. Yet ds1 likes very plain food, no sauces and nothing must touch on his plate - 3 separate piles - carbs, meat and veg ( and if a speck broccoli contaminates the carrot, it has to be inspected and removed before being eaten) Ds2 loves gravy and sauces, can't get enough of any sort of meat, is a joy to feed. He hates cheese though. Ds1 takes ages over his food, inspecting every piece, ds2 just crams it in.
By elliemae

[hurricane]

My dds are 3 and 5. Yes I'm a teacher as is dp but if I was a SAHM and dp worked late I wuld still eat with my kids as would dp. Tbh I find this response a bit werd. Researces hve been sayingthis stuff fr years -that it's bettr to eat together as a family, that it's iportant to introducea range of foods, that its bettr not to gve attention to undeiribe behaviour etc and it's prettycommon sense relly isn't it?

[oliveoil]

but what if one of your guests was upset?

would you really say TOUGH and not offer an alternative snack?

that is a bit mean imo, not for older children but for say 6 or under, definitley