A sweary thread about anxiety. You have been warned.

[ChickensHaveNoLips]

Fuck off anxiety. Take your shitty, twatting blown-out-of-all-proportion circling thoughts with you. Stop making my poor ole brain fixate and obsess over ridiculous things that raise my heart rate and make me want to run. Stop making me bore myself with this arsing, ridiculous, shitting arseholery.

My name is Chickens, and today I am cripplingly anxious because my dog has got a bit arsey with other dogs trying to take his ball. Yep, it's that twatting trivial. I hate you, brain.

[YommyMommy]

I love ur post thepie. X x

[ThePlEWhoLovedMe]

Dear Panic Disorder, Agoraphobia, PTSD and Health Anxiety.

You have put me through 21 years of fucking hell, but you will not beat me.

You have made me think I was mad, but you will not beat me.

You have stopped me from going out of my house for a year, but you will not beat me.

You have fucked up relationships, but you will not beat me.

You have robbed my children of doing normal childhood things because at times i cannot leave my house, but you will not beat me.

You have driven me to 'self medicate' with alcohol, but you will not beat me.

You have also made me compassionate, self aware, determined and strong - for that I thank you ...dare I say that over the years you have become like an annoying friend ...I can not imagine my life with out you ...

[alwaysworriedtoo]

Hello again!
I have honestly been feeling much better.And I swore and wasn't struck down by lightening!
I have had a few slight worries, but all the research I have been doing and the fear of having to rely on medication is helping I believe. Just in case though I have been taking well woman Multi-vitamins. I have not got anxious about them though I can never remember to take them two days in a row! It seems to be one day miss a day up to now.
I have been learning my times tables whenever I have started to get the anxious feelings stiring and that has taken my mind of it slightly. Some things I have put my mind foot down and thought.-If that happens we can sort it out.but wait and see-that-might not happen.
Here comes the sweary bit!
Yesterday I got shat on by a seagull.
Not in my hair or on my arm but down the inside -yes, the inside- of my coat.
the shit streaked in a lovely line down near the zip and also onto my tracksuit top and I wasn't too sure but I thought it went on my t-shirt as well.
Dh said just put it in the wash it will be fine.
I thought -he is right I will just put it in the wash it will be fine.
And so I did.
I only washed my hands about four times!
But I didn't wash out the washing machine after I did it and I handled my coat 'normally' when I took it from the machine.
(I only walked around with spread eagled hands for a tiny amount of time and then realised how silly I looked!)
So the anxiety is fucking off at the moment.
Yee-Ha!

And I got shat on.
I think it's supposed to be lucky but I think its only lucky for the bird as it isn't constipated any longer.

[keekeeblue]

I love this thread - it makes me feel human xx

I completely empathise with you Recall

Anxiety/panic attacks/fatigue just fuck the fuck off and let me be me (I don't know how to be me anymore!)

Fuck off and let me stop using too much hand gel
Fuck off and let me stop throwing good food away
Fuck off and let me stop googling images of mouth cancer
Fuck off and let me stop googling symptoms of everything that hurts
Fuck off and let me drive in the ice/snow/rain
Fuck off and let me stop checking my children aren't dead every morning
Fuck off and let me stop repeatedly walking back to the car to check the handbrake is on/front door is locked
Fuck off and let me stop feeling sick when the phone rings
Fuck off and let me stop feeling sick when I receive mail - the postman makes me jump a foot off the ground every day he brings mail
Fuck off and let me stop feeling sick when someone knocks on the door
Fuck off and let me stop expecting to see blue flashing lights at my house when I come home

[recall]

It should help, I saw one regarding my varnish licking lip curler, and I was then able to see why she was doing it. If I saw another dog approach, I would feel a bit anxious , and scrabble to get her on the lead in case she attacked them, but she picked up on it and thought I was frightened of the approaching dog, and tried to protect me.

[ChickensHaveNoEyebrows]

I've just made a date with a dog behaviourist. This will either make me feel more confident in handling my bastard dog, or cripple me with a whole load of new anxieties. Bollocking hell

[recall]

That told the bastard !

[recall]

Fuck off and let me stop cutting up grapes into four
Fuck off and stop me pouring boiling water over our chicken's eggs
Fuck off and let me stop using too much hand gel
Fuck off and let me stop pouring boiling water over chopping boards
Fuck off and let me stop throwing good food away
Fuck off and let me stop googling images of malignant melanomas
Fuck off and let me stop googling symptoms of meningitis
Fuck off and let me stop checking my neck for lumps
Fuck off and let me wash my boobs in the shower without feeling sick
Fuck off and let me drive in the ice
Fuck off and let me stop checking my turds for blood
Fuck off and let me stop checking my children aren't dead every morning
Fuck off and let me stop repeatedly walking back to the car to check the handbrake is on
Fuck off and let me stop feeling sick when the phone rings
Fuck off and let me stop feeling sick when I receive mail
Fuck off and let me stop expecting to see blue flashing lights at my house when I come home

Fuck off and let me love my children in peace !!

[recall]

yes freelance I recognised them straight away.

Anxiety you are a bully ! A nasty fucked up life sucking sinister bastard.

[FreelanceMama]

Fuck off anxiety. Fuck off "But what if...". How dare you come into my home. I will break your fucking arms off and use them to beat your skull in, Anxiety, before you touch my baby boy and contaminate him with your cruel, selfish, evil ways.

The only time you can't touch me is when I am living life at my son's pace - he lives in the present moment and is fascinated with life and so quick to be happy. Being with him and focusing on him is like meditating.

So fuck off you bastard and get the hell away from my family.

(Anyone see the Dementors in HP films and find them oddly familiar...?)

[sweetkitty]

Fuck off anxiety if it weren't for you I could have bundled the DC in the car took them down the coast for chips and an ice cream, instead I'm stuck in here as I'm too fucking scared to go out. Too scared of driving them anywhere in case I have an accident and something happens to them.

[recall]

My varnish licker was a bastard with other dogs, and sometimes blokes. I was going over some stepping stones with her once and a child was coming the other way, I saw a look of horror on the child's face and when I looked, she was curling her lip and baring her teeth, all sneaky and quietly. Had to get a muzzle in the end, so I could relax. (It stopped her licking varnish too )

[recall]

and the one who fell in the river also ran into a field and started eating a big smelly yellow toadstool

[ChickensHaveNoEyebrows]

Mine's just a bastard with other dogs sometimes. All easily pre-empted and possible to deal with, but my arseholing brain wants to make it in to a disaster on a Biblical scale. Today, I shall eat cake and listen to cheesy '80's pop and not give a fuck

[recall]

and another one fell in the river Exe....nearly died trying to rescue her

[recall]

I remember my Dog licking wet varnish once.....that fucked me right up for two days

[recall]

I'll have your dog if you have my mole ....?

[ChickensHaveNoEyebrows]

Oh, I empathise with just wanting to lay the burden down. Because it is a fucking burden, carrying all these worries and fears around all the time. I'd love to just...feck it off in to the garden, for example, and skip about eating Nutella from the jar and not sodding worrying for a bit. Unfortunately, when I shut the dog in the garden he just barks to be let back in

[recall]

Yes, thanks chicken Just been to nurse with yet another mole to be checked. She said it was fine - of course - I am seeing the GP on Thursday and going to ask her to refer me to a private psychiatrist/clinical psychologist. I have tried hypnotherapy twice, CBT, will just keep pushing until I get some relief.

I wouldn't say I was suicidal, just have an urge to get away from it which of course I can't.

As I got home from the Nurse, I trotted in all relieved and slammed the kitten in the door - now I'm fretting about her, although she seems ok

FUCKWANKINGBASTARDINGSNOTGOBBLINGANXIETY....

ahhhhhh.....thats better

[ChickensHaveNoEyebrows]

Oh recall, that sounds bloody exhausting. Anxiety is such an energy zapper. My anxiety makes me want to get rid of its source, so I understand what you're saying. There's almost a sense of 'FFS, let's just get it over with!'. Of course, there is no logic in that. I hope you're ok?

[recall]

The irony that the fear of dying is so bad that I occasionally consider suicide

[recall]

Anxiety you are a cunting bullying bastard.

Moles

Meningitis

E coli

Septicemia

They rule my fucking head.....all day until I self medicate on wine.

Don't know what to do, my life is blighted, its just pure misery
Only since I had the children

My son had infected eczema last week and I was in such a state that he would get septicaemia and die >

[Bunnygotwhacked]

I would like to join in by saying fuck the fuck off panic attacks i have had loads these past 2 weeks fuck knows whats causing it it has got so bad now i can't leave the house without having at least one usually more can't go on the bus am leaving it till last minute to do pick ups from school/clubs so i can just rush there and back again. I can't have conversations with people without one starting always think i'm going to faint or be sick I have a life i have stuff i need to do feel so fucking trapped how dare this try and take over my life i feel so fucking angry with myself

[Valdeeves]

Oh I like this - I thought it was just me obsessing. I am like this with relationships - sometimes I get so stressed I feel like I'm going to faint.

[Charleebird]

Anyone else feel a constant nervous feeling? Scared feeling? Feeling like your not you anymore and your going insane? Just want to cry but whats that guna do. I wake up feeling like shot every morning and just feel constantly on edge like something bad will happen.
Fuck this shit.