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Why didn't your child apply to Oxford or Cambridge?

359 replies

ZeroSomeGameThingy · 27/05/2014 09:10

www.theguardian.com/education/2014/may/27/oxbridge-state-school-numbers-falling

Given that most people who apply will not get in - there's no shame in an unsuccessful application. So what are the real reasons for this apparent reluctance?

OP posts:
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EastLondonObserver · 16/11/2022 12:51
  1. Because they viewed university as not just an educational experience, but as a life experience. Consequently, they were looking for a large lively city with plenty of gigs, clubs and culture. They'd had enough of the small town they'd grown up in and wanted a place where they could start to live as an independent (ish) adult. Oxford and Cambridge can't hold a candle to Manchester, Birmingham or London in terms of stuff going on. Yes, there are loads of societies and whatnot, but most of DCs passions involved interacting not only with other students.
  2. Because they felt they wouldn't find their 'tribe' at Oxbridge - too many posh people, privately educated and, most importantly, not enough kids into the kind of underground art, music and culture that is their passion.
  3. Because they weren't interested in the kinds of careers - journalism, banking, law, science etc where Oxbridge carries real weight.


They got four A grade As at A level including to A*s and went to a RG uni in a big city. A decade later, it's all worked out fine.
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ZeroSomeGameThingy · 16/11/2022 17:53

Ah … So it was you, @EastLondonObserver …. Whatever made you decide to resurrect an eight year old thread?

But what a stupendous read it is, second time around! So Much Has Changed since 2014 in terms of Oxbridge access. At least it appears that way to me and I’m familiar with both universities. (And have seen the evolution since my own undergrad days in the 80s.)

MN felt different in 2014, too. I know everyone name changes, but I suspect some of the wonderfully articulate posters above are simply not here any more. (And yes, I do understand how that sounds. Halloween Grin)

(PS - I’m much more up to date on current Uni funding now; youngest in the family currently an undergrad - so really don’t need any more info!)

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Cod · 16/11/2022 19:50

I obviously posted on this under an alias all those years ago.

REVEAL. - my youngest son got in. He’s the one I moaned about in my first ever post on here when he was a baby 😀

state school. Applied in lockdown. No help at all from anyone.

im pretty proud.

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mrBanks · 16/11/2022 20:19

@Cod well done, what amazing news to hear. Absolutely love to hear these stories of children going to normal schools and having the intelligence, resilience and application to achieve to that level. Hope to hear so many more of these stories in the future. I hope he is having a ball!

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Cod · 16/11/2022 21:18

thanks He really did. Never visited. Interview by zoom. Aiming for a first


and spoiler HE DID SLEEP THROUGH EVENTUALLY

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mrBanks · 17/11/2022 08:13

@Cod hah!!

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Artsyblartsymum · 18/11/2022 15:53

TheWordFactory · 27/05/2014 10:44

I'm involved in the widening access scheme for Oxbridge and experience has shown me that there are hugely varied reasons why students don't apply, some justified, many not.

Ones I've come across include;

  1. It costs more to study there.
  2. All the students are rich.
  3. You have to have been to public school.
  4. People from 'ordinary' backgrounds feel out of place.
  5. Lectures are often in Latin (no really).
  6. You have to have all A*s at GCSE.
  7. You're not allowed to work during term time.
  8. It's super-intensive.
  9. It's too old fashioned.

10. You have to live in a college.
11. You're not allowed to stay in accommodation during the holidays.
12. Everyone there is a genuis.

I could go on....

But the main reason why students from less advanatged backgrounds don't apply is the overwhelming feeling that it's just not for people like them. That all the students are posh and/or genius level geeks.

I love your answer. My DD went to Oxford this year and yes we heard a lot of these things as she was going through the application process, which is daunting especially for state school kids, which she was, because you just don't have any hand holding when applying to universities in general. Also, with Oxford you have to declare a college and we had very little guidance. She did a lot of research herself. Her school encouraged her to apply, but they didn't help her anymore than they helped the rest of her cohort applying to further education and apprenticeships. They made sure she knew the deadlines, checked she had a personal statement. They did tell her she needed to take the LNAT for her course AFTER the LNAT deadlines. Luckily she clocked this about 6 months earlier because she did her research and had already taken it. Many of her friends applied, a few got interviews and 4 including her got in from her state school. They are all at different colleges. The work is intense. She does have to move out of her room during the holidays, but she gets a locker to store some of her things. She's met lovely normal people from all different backgrounds and she is loving it thankfully. She's hoping to go back to her state school and help others who may be in encouraged to apply like she did because they have the grades but feel intimidated because of their back ground. You don't have to be posh to go there. You do have to be smart and on it. But, she has wonderful friends who didn't get in and have gone off to other great universities. And those kids are also smart and bright.

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Artsyblartsymum · 18/11/2022 16:01

Cod · 16/11/2022 19:50

I obviously posted on this under an alias all those years ago.

REVEAL. - my youngest son got in. He’s the one I moaned about in my first ever post on here when he was a baby 😀

state school. Applied in lockdown. No help at all from anyone.

im pretty proud.

Hilarious. I only just realised how old this thread was.

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ThighMistress · 18/11/2022 16:42

My dc got in from a state school - the most help they got was from me quoting Mumsnet!

I would say though that most state school kids well, any kids actually, want to go to Oxbridge for the academic excellence and the traditions. It’s patronising to have the notion that widening access should involve axing nice dinners/gowns/Latiny bits, let alone giving kids the idea that it’s not “super intensive” (see poster above in charge of widening participation Hmm ) . Are state school kids incapable of hard work and sitting down to eat?

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