How much do you spend on children that aren't your own?

[BeccaBloomwood]

We do a secret santa for the adult family members which takes a lot of the financial stress away, but we still have a lot of children to buy for.

Excluding our own children, we have 13 children to buy for including nieces and nephews.

I was going to suggest to family friends the possibility of just exchanging a chocolate santa or little sweet treat this year, however they got in touch with us first to ask for suggestions and I suppose I was too embarassed to suggest the above in case they thought I was cheap

Is £10 for a gift for a family friend's child too cheap? Last year we received lovely gifts from them which seemed rubbish compared to what we got them, but we are trying quite hard to save money for an upcoming expense in the New Year so my budget isn't great.

How much would you spend on nieces and nephews? I was thinking £20? We also have 3 birthdays coming up before Christmas and 1 in early January so that doesn't help 😂

Finally, would you appreciate a £10 giftcard in lieue of a present? I don't want to pick something that will never be used and thought a giftcard might be a better option as the parents can chose something they will use or put it towards a bigger present? I was thinking Waterstones vouchers because who doesn't love books?!?

Thanks 😊

[Cherryrainbow]

In terms of nephews/nieces is it worth doing a secret santa thing- name out of a hat and buy for that family ie. The sister/brother their partner and kids. My mum did that for years with her sisters as there's a ridiculous number of siblings, therefore a crazy amount of cousins. So they just bought for one sister and her family.

Between me and my partner we only have the 1 nephew to buy for so we put together a budget of £50 (age 7) which has got him 3 big gifts.

[Love51]

B&M! Home Bargains. Amazon. Sometimes The Range although you have to be eagle eyes.
Bizarrely one of the frozen food shops near us do a lot of "kit" type toys (I think it is Fultons) for a couple of quid cheaper than supermarkets.
Branded Rubix cubes are pricey, but I've seen knock off ones for £3 -£5 in various places. The Lego was £6.99 and a limited range of kits (not the Harry Potter Lego unfortunately for me).
I steer clear of The Entertainer and Hobbycraft.
If it makes a difference I live in Yorkshire and not the salubrious part. My other half works near a lot of shops so I let him know what I'm in the market for and he keeps his eyes open.
My kids are lower ks2, as they get older you probably need to spend more for quality. I know a rubix whizz who wouldn't be content with a knock off one but it's fine to learn on.

[Nonamesavail]

5-10 in previous years but all mutually agreed not to do it this year

[LooneyLovefood]

[quote ruby4ever]@Love51
Where do you shop? I've bought magic sets, science sets, craft sets for my kids, I paid £12-15 each for them.
Am actually looking to buy a Rubik's cube, cheapest I've found is £15
I'll be laughing if I ever found Lego for under £7.
I agree books depending on age can be bought very cheap. [/quote]
Where are you looking for Rubik's cubes that they're costing £15?? Amazon have them from £3 and up, same with Smyths, The Works and Tesco etc.

[ruby4ever]

@Love51
Where do you shop? I've bought magic sets, science sets, craft sets for my kids, I paid £12-15 each for them.
Am actually looking to buy a Rubik's cube, cheapest I've found is £15
I'll be laughing if I ever found Lego for under £7.
I agree books depending on age can be bought very cheap.

[Ellapaella]

I spend more on my nieces and nephews on their birthdays and a bit less at Christmas (agreed by all family, we all do the same).

About £30 each birthdays but at Christmas it's less - I have 12 nieces and nephews and 3 of my closest friends children I buy for as well.
My sister and I buy each other's children yearly annuals of their choice and sweets, the two older teenagers get an Amazon voucher. It probably works out about £10 each for the younger ones and £15 each for the vouchers.

[hels71]

I spend around £10 on each niece and nephew. The two older girls get a £10 gift voucher. 4 of them have birthdays around Christmas too...

[haliborange0verdose]

We have pared our Christmas recipient list right back the past few years as it was getting ridiculous. DH comes from a HUGE family (and I'm not even talking about cousins, just almost 100 people when you count up siblings, siblings in law, nieces/nephews and great-nieces/nephews). At one point, we used to buy for about 40 of his family, plus 12 of my family and a few friends kids. First thing to go was the friends kids... The friends were actually quite relieved when I brought it up, as it took some pressure off them. Gradually we've cut down who we buy for, so now it's strictly under 18s and only the ones we are close to and see regularly (well, regularly before Covid anyway!)
So from having to buy for around 60 people other than ourselves and our kids, we now only buy for 13. Budget is on average £15 each.

[mam0918]

@ruby4ever

I don't get what decent gift one could buy from £2-£7, surely it would be tat at that price. I'd rather give a fiver to the child than give tat.

I would suggest you learn to shop around because either your a snob or you simply dont know where to shop

My kids get loads of gifts under £7 (books, board games, dvds, arts and crafts, swimming stuff and tonnes of offical licenced products from their favorite things like paw patrol and fortnite) and they arent 'tat'.

no child wants a £5, its not an exciting gift - especially given you yourself deem that £5 can buy 'nothing but tat'.

[simplyme83]

i spend £40 on my nieces(x2) and nephews(x2) ages 5,9,13,14. on one set of friends kids(4) i spend £10 each at xmas(15 for birthdays) aged between 18mths-9, plus postage. another friend i spend £40 on her 6yr old(i spend xmas with them) and 15 on 2 other kids(7 and 5) we also spend xmas with but i'm less close to. i also have 3 other kids i buy for(16,13,11) and at xmas i buy them a board game between them and a small choc each. so spend somewhere between 15-25 on them altogether. i look after 3 kids as a nanny(4yrs and 2yr old twins) and i spend 15 each on them

[Love51]

@ruby4ever Really you can't think of gifts in that price range? My favourite gift is!
Books! You'd have to check it was relevant to the child's interests and they don't already have it, but that applies to every gift.
Also under £7
Bath / cosmetic sets.
Craft sets.
Craft supplies / tools
Science kit
Magic kit
Make your own... Kit (bath bombs, lip gloss, slime)
Knitting needles, a booklet and wool.
Really good discounted Lego find.
Chocolate orange / Toblerones/ selection box /any sweets
Wooden puzzles. Knock off rubix cube
Any of these would be treasure to certain kids I know and tat to others. Except the chocolate! You just have to know your audience (or check with the parents ahead of purchase - if you have already bought it they will be polite and say yes)

[ruby4ever]

I don't get what decent gift one could buy from £2-£7, surely it would be tat at that price. I'd rather give a fiver to the child than give tat.

[UndertheCedartree]

@Elfieishere - for the final time I do not 'pass it off' as brand new! If you'd rather turn up with no present for a DC when you could give them a lovely present albeit second hand or feel offended when someone poor makes lots of effort to give your DC a nice present albeit second hand then I find that quite mean. But each to their own

[Elfieishere]

[quote UndertheCedartree]@Elfieishere - I already said I don't 'pass it off' as something I bought. However it means the recipient has something nice to open on Christmas day/Birthday. Young DC aren't bothered about having hand me downs. I think it is you that has the problem. You'd be mortified?! I'd be more mortified to turn up empty handed. And I guess when you are poor you get used to maybe being mortified for not having much money but why should you be? I really appreciate the care and thought that goes into putting aside, maybe cleaning toys, making sets of them and packaging them that my friend does. I've barely seen my nephew this year due to Covid/distance. I do pass on clothes etc as my DC outgrow but a brand new box of Lego when he has just started to get into Lego and his parents have said it will be a great present but they don't have the space for me to give him a massive box of Lego plus another toy bought for the sake of it - I'll let hom have the fun of unwrapping it for Christmas![/quote]
Yes, I’d be mortified to pass of my daughters old toys as a gift for someone for Xmas.

I don’t really think that indicates I have a problem of any sorts and you are completely incorrect in the assumption that Iv always had money.

[multivac]

@Bikingbear

It’s not a gift, it’s just a hand me down. You didn’t buy it with the recipient in mind.

I'd agree with that. The vast majority of people pass good condition toys on to other people, charity shops or sell them.

Passing things on isn't a gift in my eyes, I don't even do it with my own kids, yet loads on here think nothing of regifting baby toys from one sibling to the next.

Thousands of Children will receive second hand toys at Christmas. But I'd hope that they are choosen and given with a bit more thought than, "I found this in the cupboard it I'll wrap it up for DNephew" esp regardless of age appropriate, or the childs interests, that's mean if you can afford not too.

Who on Earth would do that?! Weird comment.

[Angbunnyboo]

£50 each for my niece and nephew and £20 on the two friends kids I buy for. We don't have any children of our own so I like having kids to buy for.

[MsSquiz]

We spend around £50 per child for birthday and Christmas on 3 nephews and 1 niece (all birthdays in November and December)

Around £30 on birthday gifts for my best friend's 2 kids, but nothing for Christmas

[UndertheCedartree]

@Bikingbear - thank you. I'd never just wrap up any old thing. It is something specific I've checked with his parents he will like and I've told them it is a hand me down and asked if that would be ok.

[Bikingbear]

Ceder ignore me, it makes perfect sense if it's an appropriate toy, and your on low income.

I was more thinking if a kid has no interest in Paw Patrol and someone wraps up a bundle of Paw Patrol stuff because that's what they have.

[Onedropbeat]

£15 on nieces and nephews (there’s a lot)

Used to be £10 on friends children but phasing that out this year

[Feminist10101]

DH has 6 nieces and nephews. We don’t buy for them (used to, but they never reciprocated for DD and didn’t even say thank you so 🤷🏻‍♀️)

I have a new nephew this year. Will spend about £30 on him (more to appease my bloody mother so she can shut up about being offended by my absolute hatred of Xmas).

[UndertheCedartree]

Would it be ok if I donated the Lego to the charity shop and then bought it back? If I've got something perfect for someone I don't get why I can't cut out the middleman? I'm guessing that those who would be mortified by giving a second hand gift have always had the money for gifts. Not everyone does.

[UndertheCedartree]

@Bikingbear - I'm on a very low income so I couldn't afford to get him anything like the brand new box of Lego I have for him. I have chosen to give it to him as he has just got into Lego. I have also bought a specific book for him. His parents are very enviromentally conscious and would much rather a second hand present. He will get a much bigger present than I can afford otherwise. I don't think I should be ashamed of giving my DN a lovely present albeit second hand as that is all I can afford.

[UndertheCedartree]

@Elfieishere - I already said I don't 'pass it off' as something I bought. However it means the recipient has something nice to open on Christmas day/Birthday. Young DC aren't bothered about having hand me downs. I think it is you that has the problem. You'd be mortified?! I'd be more mortified to turn up empty handed. And I guess when you are poor you get used to maybe being mortified for not having much money but why should you be? I really appreciate the care and thought that goes into putting aside, maybe cleaning toys, making sets of them and packaging them that my friend does. I've barely seen my nephew this year due to Covid/distance. I do pass on clothes etc as my DC outgrow but a brand new box of Lego when he has just started to get into Lego and his parents have said it will be a great present but they don't have the space for me to give him a massive box of Lego plus another toy bought for the sake of it - I'll let hom have the fun of unwrapping it for Christmas!

[Bikingbear]

It’s not a gift, it’s just a hand me down. You didn’t buy it with the recipient in mind.

I'd agree with that. The vast majority of people pass good condition toys on to other people, charity shops or sell them.

Passing things on isn't a gift in my eyes, I don't even do it with my own kids, yet loads on here think nothing of regifting baby toys from one sibling to the next.

Thousands of Children will receive second hand toys at Christmas. But I'd hope that they are choosen and given with a bit more thought than, "I found this in the cupboard it I'll wrap it up for DNephew" esp regardless of age appropriate, or the childs interests, that's mean if you can afford not too.