Overdue

[starlight125]

Any other mums out there who are overdue?

Im 40+4 with my 2nd. Only went 2 days over with my DD. Had loads of twinges and braxton hicks last week which have now settled. Feeling like I just need a moan! lol

[canihaveacoffeeplease]

SJ congratulations!! At least it's all over now, even though it sounded horrible. I hope your little one is wonderful and sleeping lots.

New boots hi! Yup, same as me, 41+2 today. I'm sorry pure feeing so down, this really is awful isn't it. I had dd at 39+6 with no signs at all, so was definitely not expecting to go this far over and am really struggling with it now.

Like you butterfly all yesterday's efforts, including a blindingly hot chilli for dinner, did nothing at all except give me brutal heartburn all night! Woke up and had a cry this morning, feeling very wretched this morning and seriously doubting I'm ever going to go Into labour by myself which is just devastating. I am so desperate to have a chance at homebirth again, it was fantastic with my dd and I am so scared of hospitals, interventions, inductions, and everything else that goes with it, and I really do see myself heading down that route. Woken up to horrible weather so no long walk today, maybe head out to a big local outlet place and walk around there for a while, have a coffee and maybe a tiny bit of needless shopping to cheer myself up!

Hugs everyone

[MrsH87]

41 today. Out for a curry last night. Declicious but entirely useless.

SJ - really pleased to hear your baby is here. It sounds like you had an awful time of it, I hope you get to talk through it all with someone and you are able to get home soon and enjoy your new little boy. Hope your DH is ok too. Sounds like you all had a rough ride. After your experience I've made a mental note to add some ear plugs to my hospital bag in case my planned MLU birth doesn't materialise!

[manhowdy]

You were an absolute hero from the sounds of things SJ. Huge congrats on the arrival of your little one. Hopefully your fears over shoulder dystocia were unrealised, despite all the other problems.

Hope you get out of there asap and home to enjoy your new arrival properly xx

[lelapaletute]

Oh my goodness SJ, that sounds very rough - don't blame you for feeling traumatised. Be very gentle with yourself, and remember you've done amazingly! I hope you're recovering enough to be able to enjoy your baby. WELL DONE!

I was in is morning for outpatient induction via Propess - once the halfwit receptionist has sent me to the wrong department where no one had time to book me for over an hour, so no one realised I was in the wrong place, I was ready to go back to my 'lock self in bathroom' plan!!! Grr.

Anyway, I got the pessary at about 10.40, started getting cramps and period type feelings pretty much straight away, had to stay on monitoring for AGES as baby's heart kept changing every time I moved (which I had to, because the bed was SOOOO UNCOMFORTABLE!!!) - finally discharged around noon. Went for a long walk with partner and had lunch in the pub, with crampy action throughout but nothing like a contraction (no real pain, no regularity). Walked home, and everything seems to have slacked off a bit, which is a bit scary. Today is my last day to be eligible for the birth centre, so if things don't get a wriggle on I'm going to be stuck with the labour ward. Having spent time in the antenatal ward today I am DREADING it - curtained bays mean you can hear other women suffering contractions, throwing up, kids and family (who shouldn't even be there) shouting and screaming, and OH MY GOD THE MIDWIVES - my bay was right by the midwives station and they DID NOT STOP yapping on about total nonsense the whole three hours I was there, about child molestation mostly (very relaxing chat to have listen to as a pregnant lady). I just seriously can't stand the idea of being there when I'm really going through it, moaning in pain while other people listen to me and have banal wittering conversations in the background. I'm seriously considering not going back tomorrow morning if the pessary doesn't work, because I just can't stand the thought of it. Someone tell me I'm being a dickhead. Or if you're a praying type, please pray that I go into labour before midnight!!!

[manhowdy]

They didn't show any of this shit on One Born Every Minute did they?

[lelapaletute]

manhowdy that actually made me lol. THANK YOU! xx

[Mumchatting]

Lelapaletue
What a great description of labour ward! Spot on! When I was induced with my son I was given pessary over night and hearing the noises of women in pain and in labour put me in no relaxation, it was just so stressful! I hated that so much....

[sj257]

Sorry ladies I'm in some kind of sleep deprived fog. The icing on the cake was the loudest snorer in the world in my bay on the postnatal ward, think I've had about 9 hours sleep tops since Wednesday!

My hubby is fine the doctor at a&e put it down to stress and sleep deprivation!

I hope babies are doing well and those of you still pregnant aren't for much longer xx

[AButterflyLightsBesideUs]

Just signing in to screech AAARGH in frustration.

Another failed sweep attempt this morning, still not possible to get in there. 40+6 now. Stomped up a hill yesterday, had sex, curry on Saturday, ffs why is nothing happening!

[Mumchatting]

41+5. Anyone else ???

[Wonderflonium]

Hello my darlings! She's here! 42+1

In Denmark, they give you oral prostaglandins first before they try the pessary and send you home. I took 6 of them and the contractions started to actually come regularly and stay. They were more than manageable but arriving really close together, so we called the midwife. I was supposed to get my "own" team of three with an 80% chance of getting one of them.
The Law of Sod smiled on me and I was in the 20%.

Showed up to the labour ward and had a CTG, the contractions well and truly petered out, my cervix was no different from the morning and I was grumpy as hell. They sent me home. They instructed me to get some sleep but with contractions every 3 minutes this was more aspirational. I was just drifting in a doze when I felt this bizarre 'pop' inside me (not waters but the bloody show made its appearance) and then shit got real.

Got a lovely midwife who examined me and found my cervix was mostly effaced but not really dilated. This changed really quickly and I dilated all the way in a few hours. This was way more than I could handle with a bath and some mantras, so I worked my way up to the epidural. It meant they needed to do a continuous CTG and once I fully dilated around the midwife change of shift, there were signs that the baby was having a horrible time so they needed to do even more monitoring.

The deal had been that I'd get a named midwife and she'd be the one with me, maybe a student... In the event, I got two midwives I had never met, a student midwife, and once the extra monitoring began, a doctor, a midwife supervisor and a healthcare assistant.

I was sort of hoping the epidural would make pushing, you know, not painful. But no, it was. Also my PGP was horrific. The pushing phase lasted a lot longer than I thought it would and they were talking about vacuum extraction... and then she came out and everything was lovely suddenly. PGP gone.

What surprised me was, having seen births like this on OBEM, I thought I'd be more distressed but I'm actually fine with how it went. They were respectful and kind, and that made all the difference.

Super congrats SJ, hope your husband is ok. I'm sorry the epidural didn't work, that sucks.

Fingers crossed for you Lelapaletue

[sj257]

Congratulations wonder, my first was 42+1! You sound like you did amazingly xxxx

I feel like I've been hit by a bus today, had such a bad night with my little one, at 7 this morning I'd had 45 minutes sleep. Managed to sleep 7-9.15, 3 hours total, I'm running on empty. I was ready to give up breastfeeding. I'm feeling more positive now but kind of dreading tonight!

[Mumchatting]

Congratulations Wonder !!
42+1 that's impressive :-)

[lelapaletute]

Congrats Wonder! I'm in overnight now halfway through 18 hours of prostin gel attempts. Sent my partner home to get some sleep - hes stressed because of how slow everything is in the ward - an hour waiting to be admitted, 2 hours before they hook me up to monitoring, keep repeating the monitoring because the machine was broken, then because it was baby's main moving time so her heart rate kept going up and down. We came in at 5 and I didn't get the first dose of prostin until 9.30 (each dose is left to work for 6 hours. Tried to sleep, but they woke me to move me to a different bay as a woman had left the crowded one and the one I was in had only me in it. Can't sleep as it is so hot.

I have never felt less like I'm about to go in to labour. It's like it's been getting further and further away since Saturday, and is now so remote a possibility all this seems completely futile. I've been crying and crying, and now I just feel completely numb and hopeless. I just want this to be over, I've stopped caring how. I'm scared by how remote I feel, I am usually so happy to hear baby's heartbeat, but I've been on monitoring so long now I can't actually bear the noise. For the last couple of weeks I've been excited, frustrated, nervous - now I just feel dead, and useless. I want my partner, but there's just no sense him being here when nothing is happening for hours on end, and it makes me feel guilty. He's meant to be on pat leave from today as we were sure we'd have a baby by now. But I could still be at this by tomorrow night without success. The idea of that seems so awful I can't quite let it in my head because it makes me wish I was dead.

Don't have an induction if you can help it - get the baby checked regularly and as long as they're not in distress or at risk, don't go down this route. I thought it was the quickest way to my baby, but it just traps you in this godawful limbo where you can't have a baby but can't do anything else except TRY to have a baby, THINK about having a baby and why you can't do it when so many women can.

I keep seeing myself as part of this smaller and smaller percentage of women - first the 1/5 who have to be induced, then the 27% of that 20% for whom Propess doesn't work, then the whatever tiny percent for whom prostin doesn't work, and so on until they FINALLY just cut the baby out of me because my body can't birth her.

All I want right now is to go to sleep and not wake up again until the baby is born and I can take her home. But I don't see myself getting the chance to sleep for possibly days.

Is this what PND feels like? Can you get PND without even having had a baby? I don't know. I just can't see anything positive to hang on to, it all looks grim and hopeless.

[MrsH87]

lelapaletute - not sure I have anything to make you feel better, but I'm awake and didn't want to leave your message unresponded! I'm not surprised by how you feel (all of what you write sounds like a certain way to put an end to any natural oxytocin you were producing!), but this has nothing to do with your ability - you've carried a human and kept her safe for 9 months, which is no mean feat!! This is just a small hurdle at the end of that journey. Even if it turns into days, it is still such a short amount of time compared with what you have already achieved and will achieve as a parent.

Try not to clock-watch. If you can't sleep then don't try in vain. Is there anything else you can do to relax? Do you have some music to listen to, or any relaxation techniques that might work? IPlayer or Netflix to hand - watch something mindless?

Please talk through exactly how you feel with your partner when you see him. It's really important that he knows.

Most importantly - there will be an end, you will take your baby home! x

[manhowdy]

Hooray wonder! Huge congrats on your safe arrival, I am so pleased to read your update

lelapaletute sounds absolutely fucking grim and I am not surprised you are feeling the way you do. Very much like sj's induction experience at the start, and her baby came without the need of a C section, so please focus on that if you can.

Can you go for a walk? Just tell them you're going. Surely the best thing is going to be staying as active as poss and not being strapped for monitoring. My contractions definitely slowed every time I tried to relax on Weds, if I kept pottering they kept coming.

[manhowdy]

Mumchatting ~ from your gestation we were due on the same day. Hopefully you've gone into labour by now! Good luck either way, as I am guessing you may now be sat waiting to be induced.

[AButterflyLightsBesideUs]

I have started! Rocking around on my birth ball now, I've been contracting since this morning after a revolting start involving lots of diarrhoea and vomit. Praying this is the real thing, they do actually hurt and have been every 3-6 mins for most of the day.

[sj257]

Lela, I'm pretty sure you'll have gone into labour by now, I totally get you I was left waiting 12 hours for a second gel after the pessary didn't work. Luckily I had started contracting without the need for a second one. I totally understand your frustration I was the same. I went in to be induced Wednesday morning, started getting mild contractions Thurs tea time, went to birth suite early hours of Fri morning and had him Fri afternoon xxx and now he's here I don't care about the crap induction I'm just so in love! Xxxx

[lelapaletute]

Butterfly, that's great! Hope its going well.

Baby eventually came by c section this afternoon after failure to progress. It all just meant nothing once I saw her. she is perfect (and huge - 9lb2!!!) I've never loved anyone so much or been so happy, even with a nine inch abdominal wound! :)

Thank you all for bearing with me through my hellish labour - it really made a difference. You're wonderful women xxc

[manhowdy]

Oh that's wonderful news lelapaletute ~ congratulations!!

AButterflyLightsBesideUs I hope you are now cuddling your bundle of joy too.

[sj257]

Congratulations lela xxx

[MrsH87]

Baby H born this morning at 11am. Waters broke Monday eve. Contractions started 24 hrs later and helped along with drip (was booked in to be induced because of infection risk). Forceps and spinal block after 2 hours of pushing when she was in a funny position. Basically everything I didn't want to happen happened and I really don't care. So besotted. Congratulations Lela (and I hope Butterfly). X

[manhowdy]

Congrats MrsH87! It's funny how we all get so wound up about the potential birth and then none of it really matters when they're here (well, in most cases). Glad you're both well