-to 'persuade' my daughter that tampons are not evil? LONG sorry.

[oopslateagain]

There's a backstory here! A bit graphic too, sorry. DD(12yo) has had periods for about 8 months. She came home from school earlier this week dying to get in the pool as she was so hot, I had to remind her she was still on her period.

Anyway she came downstairs a few minutes later in her swimsuit lookign all pleased with herself, I'd bought her a box of Tampax in case she ever wanted to try them, and all by herself she'd gone and put one in.

Three hours later and she came in for a shower, then yelled for me. She'd got the tampon out about half an inch and said it hurt to pull it, said it was a 'stinging' pain. Then she said she'd used a Super tampon (I got her a multipack). She was on day 5 of her period, so very very light.

I figured it was probably not ready to come out i.e. still a bit dry, but it was hurting as she'd already got it out a little bit.

Cue a very entertaining hour in the bathroom - I ran a bath, got her to lay in it and 'open' herself up, hoping it would soak the tampon. She was a little bit tearful because it was hurting but we still had a right giggle, the way she was laying there was like giving birth (she just did that subject at school) and we were making cracks about seeing its head, and whether it was a boy or girl). Anyway, eventually she managed to get it out, there was barely any blood on it at all.

She said it's put her off; but I would hate her to get it into her head that Tampons Hurt. I'm inclined to really try and persuade her to use one (a SMALL one) right at the beginning of her next period when it's really heavy, so she can see how easy it is to get out the 'right' way.

My friends think I'm mad and evil and should let her wait. I'm really worried that if she does, she'll never use one. She swims a lot, and goes to dance class, and absolutely FLOODS at night (enough to where she's started wearing Depends - she ASKED to), and I think tampons would really be a good idea.

I would never push her into something she's not ready for, but she actually used this one herself, so she obviously wanted to. I just don't want her to be 'scared' of trying a tampon again.

So, at the end of all that - AIBU?

[MultipleMama]

Just noticed the date! How did it end up back on active lol.

I miss that zombie alert notice we used to have. It needs to be brought back!!

[Gruntfuttock]

katiesnicks "Ha ha just noticed the date!! Very hungover lol"

But how did you find a 4 year old thread to post on it?

[mytartanscarf]

I've never used a tampon.

[zombiesheep]

Zombie thread everyone

[ifgrandmahadawilly]

I used to find lillets the absolute worst for this when I first started my period! The first tampons I used were free tampax ones they give me at school and they were fine, no problem. Then one day I used a lilet and OMG! It swoll up huge, got stuck and HURT. Never again.

Use tampax and maybe lube / vasaline to get it out.

These days I'm a big fan of the mooncup. Depending on the shape of your daughters' hymen, she may be able to use one whilst still a virgin.

Amazing that you have such an open relationship with your daughter.

[kungfupannda]

Why not let her give the moon cup a try? It would be safe to try it when she's not on her period, unlike a tampon, so she could practice without the pressure of making a massive mess if it goes wrong.

No harm trying.

[gingerbreadmam]

i never used tampons until probably late teens early twenties as the thought scared me. i then tried tampax compak and would never go back.

i never wear tampons at night tho, always night.time pads for that as they scare you at school about toxic shock syndrom haha!

anyway could maybe try a light or medium tampax compak as there is no fiddling around or anything with them.

[Krytes42]

Get her a mooncup / diva cup. No problems with stinging ever, and she can still go swimming, etc.

[Bulbasaur]

Dry tampons do hurt to pull out if you haven't broken your hymen yet because it stretches the skin a bit as it pulls out. In fact, even if you have, they're still uncomfortable if you're dry. I don't particularly like them you can still feel them no matter how well they contour to your walls. But I like them better than pads if I'm being active.

Anyway, she's 12. Just let her wear what she wants. Some adults never use tampons, and that's fine.

I have only have light flow periods with the BC I'm taking and I just use light pads exclusively.

[MultipleMama]

Which was handy when I was at school...

[MultipleMama]

I use a mooncup. So much less hassle and you can go swimming in it and can leave it in longer than any tampon/pad as it's medical grade silcome. You should ask her if she'd prefer to try one of these instead. They sit lower down than a tampon so more comfortable in my opinion. Give her all her options and she which she prefers more.

I switched between pads and mooncup when I was younger, as I could leave it in all day and not be too worried, and depending on flow it can last 12 hours without needing to be emptied.

[Purplepoodle]

Always used ky or vasaline on applicator as helped tampon in and out. Have u tried her on transamic acid to help reduce her flow - I found it great before I went on the pill

[CatCushion]

I ruptured my hymen with my first tampon aged 13. It bloody well did hurt more coming out than going in! Didn't use tgem again that period, but think it was all hwaled up by the next period.

[katiesnicks]

Ha ha just noticed the date!! Very hungover lol

[katiesnicks]

Tampax pearl is the way forward, really easy to use and plastic applicators :) they used to do mini ones when I was younger not sure if they still do? But are really small for extra light flow

[notasize10yetbutoneday]

Why has this old thread been resurrected?

[PhishFoodAddiction]

Another vote for the tampax pearl here. Since having DC for some reason I've found tampons really difficult to use and uncomfortable- but I tried the pearl and they were great.

Or try the mini tampax, I think they're same absorbancy as regular but thinner applicator (could be mistaken though). I think lilets are harder to use.

I had my first period the month I turned 12, and it was nearly a year after that I could finally manage to use a tampon. It might just take a bit of time for your DD to relax enough to insert/remove them comfortably.

[KatieJ75]

It is better to use KY jelly as vaseline is greasy and may stop the tampon absorbing properly.
KY is water-based and is perfect for the task, although vaseline would probably not be harmful.

[Opinionatedfreak]

I loathe and detest towels. Have used tampons since my first period. I have occasionally used a towel since - usually after being caught short where friends have lent me a towel. They've improved loads but I still dislike the drippy feeling (Sorry TMI).

I don't think you should force her but definitely encourage her to have another go with one of the smaller sizes. TBH I would have thought that tampax with their lengthwise expansion would be better than lillets (which go widthwise).

Personally I prefer an applicator but tend to just use the cheapest ones but this thread inspired me to buy a pack of tampax pearl to see what all the fuss is about!

[hellymelly]

I remember struggling with lilets,uggh.at the time they did a mini size and tampax didn't so I coated it in vaseline in the end and of course then it must have been waterproof .When tampax brought out their slender ones I started using those but tbh I still don't like tampons and rarely use them.I have never had a very heavy flow and I hate the feeling of pulling out a dry tampon,it is setting my teeth on edge just thinking about it.I think just explaining that its trial and error for all women while we work out what suits us best,get a few different types,get them for right at the start when she has a heavy flow,and different types of towels/panty liners etc ,and in a while maybe a mooncup (never used one but SIL raves about hers)and she can try everything and work out what combination is best for her.

[Jenbot]

I thought you couldn't wear tampons overnight anyway, because of the toxic shock time limit.
It's been a while since I looked at any though, so I may be mistaken!

[oopslateagain]

Oh you wouldn't be if you had to clean the bloody thing! It's a glorified paddling pool, 3ft deep and 8ft across, and as DD tends to run across to it and jump in, it's always full of bits of grass and stuff. So I'm constantly out there with the big sieve-scoop thingy, trying to fish the yucky bits out.

And it costs a fortune with chlorine, anti-algae stuff, testing tablets and the like.

Wouldn't get rid of it for the world

[lowenergylightbulb]

I'm just that you have a pool!!!!

My DD's have got tampons, but I'm not sure if they use them often. They (like me) prefer thin towels with wings.

I used to have the night time leakage thing as a teenager (with those horrid thick towels) - I eventually overcame it when towels with wings were invented - I used to use two, to sort of extend the length of the towel and give double thickness over the bit that caught the heaviest flow.

I used to always use tampons pre-kids, but since having children I can't really face them - which is a bit odd I guess!!

[5Foot5]

Another one here who started with one of those awful belts and bulky pads. My Mum told me about tampons but said that maybe I should wait until I was a bit older and, frankly, as a young teenager I was a bit scared of them.

I tried the first time when I was about 17. We were staying at my sister's house and I tried to flush a pad down the loo and it blocked it and flooded the bathroom. My Dad had to plunge the toilet to sort things out MEGA- Anyway my sister then suggested I try a tampon. I took one with me when we went out for a drink and tried to use it in the pub toilet. Unfortunately I cut my finger on the toilet roll dispenser so I was dripping blood before I could even try and abandoned the attempt!

Finally I gave them a go when I was 19 and have never looked back.

My DD is 14 and has had her period for about a year and a half. She still uses pads but I have told her about tampons. She is still not keen but I tend to think that while she is still getting use to her flow and until her cycle is reliable it is probably easier for her that way.

[TheMysticMasseuse]

Another one whose mother didn't believe in tampons... I still remember the day my best friend's mother bought her a pack (we must have been 15-16) and she shared them with me (not the same ones, of course!)... we ended up having a long conversation about how we wanted to erect a statue to Mr Tampax for single-handedly revolutionising the quality of our lives!

I went home and told my mum she was mad to use pads- and although she was never willing to try herself (probably on the grounds of them being anti-catholic, LOL @Never!) she was ok with me using them.

IMO you should just let your dd come to the same conclusion (ie pads are messy and fiddly and life-limiting) and then make sure you're there to help her out when she wants to try again.