To find baby language really annoying

[Lerato]

I have always taught dd1 to say words properly eg dog, duck etc. Why to some people use doggy, ducky etc. I hate it!

[disneystar1]

thanks for the lovely words people.

just under the month now before we go in

i know he needs to go we have no choice, i cant bear or think that we may lose him ive spent many hours just breaking my heart over this.

but we need him well and to have the chance to live, i dont know how to feel, how does a person feel knowing there child may die in 1 month,

goodasgold hes a fantastic son and our whole world and all i know is i wont leave him for a second,

weve had hours of intensive therapy and taking him on holiday and made our memories but to me this isnt true as hes not going anywhere i wont let him, my denial is big, but i dont know how to react.

thank you for your kind support and if any one is on facebook let me know as his whole diary will be on there soon his op before and after the whole story of my sons amazing life and his will to live.

[aarghhelp]

Just to say, Disneystar, so sorry re little Samuel. (weeping a bit over the computer)

[goodasgold]

My dh and I do use motherese, to the extent that we change our own vocab to match our cute toddlers. It's fun. They make us smile.

And at 10 our eldest dd is gifted and talented and the nicest little girl you could ever meet.

Love your children, love their language, have faith that they will grow out of motherese but it will leave you with a personal family language. How fantastic is that.

Disneystar1 I was vey moved by your post about baby Samuel, I hope the op goes well and ll the best for after. You sound like a fantastic mother for him.

[feralgirl]

Oh and DS is referred to as ba-ba but with a strong Cornish accent as it's a term of endearment down our way!

[feralgirl]

We talk in parentese (coz DH does it too, not just me!) to DS all the time. We repeat words, exaggerate syllables, and talk in silly, sing-song voices constantly because it's natural and it's how babies learn (as others have said).

I don't refer to myself in the third person and I never refer to the duckie/ horsey/ doggy/ bunny/ kitty-cat - even if it does make the final consonant sound easier to hear - because I think it's just too cutesy and sickening for words.

And ta is foul too. Will boot MiL and SiL if they keep saying it to DS.

[Lerato]

Gosh, this has moved on since I last looked.
Disneystar1 - so sorry to hear your story. I wish you and your ds all the best for his forthcoming op. Life can be so unfair at times.
People are right - I am being unreasonable. One of those irrational things that annoy me. However, I do use ta with the baby. Partly because nursery do and partly to annoy my mum. Contrary.

[Fairynufff]

my father to me (whilst dishing up the Sunday dinner): Do you want bakey taters and snarsnips?

My mother: For God's Sake Colin she's bloody 28!

I loved it..

[petetong]

Ninks he won't be finished for a few years yet. He has already told me that he is too busy being a 12 year old boy to be interested in girls. Give it another 4 years and you will have first dibs.

[Ninks]

I adore the expression, "love the very bones of him / her"

Very well said.

petetong you sound like you are a wonderful parent and an ideal MIL for my DD

[petetong]

I love my baby boy (who is 12). I remember the nurse pulling back the curtain on the day that he was born and telling me that I hadn't stopped grinning from the eary hours of the morning when I had had him. I aready had a dd. He was hard work as time went on, definitely not as easy as dd, but with strong parenting he has come through it. He has always been extremely affectionate and I love the bones of him. There is good and bad in all, but as somebody said earlier, I am pleased that I have helped to bring up a child who will turn into somebody's son in law and will be a loving and loyal partner.

[Ninks]

You're very welcome, and you are brave for posting on AIBU at all!

I'll be looking to see how it goes for your little DS as long as you keep us updated. Best wishes x

[disneystar1]

thank you ninks x

no not brave at all it feels like its not really happening sort of a dream, we were told by a salt at the hospital to do the method we are doing as she knew signing is important or so studies have shown to a partialy hearing downs baby,

thank you though x

[Ninks]

disneystar1, I am so sorry I missed your post about baby Samuel. I was agreeing heartily with you but I didn't see the last bit and I still say that you are doing the right thing for him. How very brave you are.

I hope you're getting MN support on the other boards too. Bless you all.

[Ninks]

Off with alison56's head!

Why? Really?

I don't get that. I use simplified sentence structure with my DS, but I don't use drastically different words to the ones he'll hear in real life.

Do adults use "ta" where you live? If not, why use a word which has no meaning in "RL" as we say on here? Because "ta" doesn't really mean "thanks" to a toddler, it is usually used in response to him giving you an object so in his / her world it just means that the adult is pleased.

The concept of thanking somebody or being thanked is way beyond the comprehension of little children, indeed it's apparently too much to ask from the adults living in the depths of the council estate near me.

All toddlers experience in response to their actions is approval or not, and they don't often care, that's what differentiates them from school children who usually aim to please.

They are egocentric and have to be guided and "ta" is a positive response in the same way that, "good boy", "kind girl" would be. It doesn't mean that they appreciate and comprehend the social arrangement that constitutes thankfulness, so why decide that "ta" means something is clearly doesn't?

It's a nice response, and a meaningful one in terms of communication, but it's one of those things where the concept comes much later, as any person with young DC would know, apart from the professionals it seems.

[disneystar1]

i should of said the quack quack sound i make to him is not a strict lesson its for fun to make him laugh.

[disneystar1]

firstly alison theres a reason i do this

its not common no but my 15mth old son is terminally ill, he had 18 mths approx to live and in 4 weeks time he has his life saving operation, if this is a success he will lose his sight we dont know how long for,
so we have done this so even though he cant see me he can feel my touch sign and i hope not be so scared,
time on my hands what time? ds has downs, virtually no hearing, curved spine, brain pressure, severe heart disease

no time here im afraid, but time is the one thing i wish i had much much more of especially with my baby samuel

[claireybee]

If you say ta normally then I have no problem with you saying it to babies. It is when people (like my auntie) insist on getting a child to say ta when they would never dream of saying ta themselves. Just teach them thank you. Neither of my dc have had any problem mastering thank you, ds said tanks to begin with but that's fine.

[alison56]

OMG disney

sorry, but as a SALT

Why teach baby sign and then also the symbolic noise?

So baby has to learn (a) the sign (b) the symbolic noise (quack) and (c) the word

For goodness sake!

Call it a duck or a ducky!

Honestly though - why do this? Do people so this for themselves or the baby? Are people really that bored that they make their kids learn that one single thing has three labels?

I blame the automatic washer. We ladies have too much time on our hands and start meddling in things of which we have so little understanding or knowldge.

Sorry of that sounds really arsey. Just - MEH!

[alison56]

Yes, I DO say "ta"!!!!

and I'm a SALT

I ought to be struck off?!

Really, language is a living thing - it has no boundaries.

[disneystar1]

i dont take baby talk serious they have years before there adults and lets be honest they dont go round at 10 saying lets go to the choo choo station do they

i have taught my 15mth old to touch sign and the words are dog cat cow etc..... but if we feed the ducks i do say the sound they make eg, quack quack, but its (sign) duck then sound they make,

if we all listened to research and what to do and what not to do what a boring place we would be at.

there babies they dont stay that way for long, enjoy the babyhood, its precious.

[Ninks]

edam , twirl away, it was fab!

[IDriveaRedCar]

I hate the made-up stuff too. My MIL says things like "time to go bye-byes" in a baby-fied voice instead of "time to go to bed" so my 2 ds's look at her blankly, and she even calls my ds2 eefan rather than ethan which drives me totally crazy.

She'll say things like "eefan tumble down" instead of "ethan's fallen down" aarrrgghhh!

[edam]

did someone call?

Why, thank you kindly ma'am.

[CrankOfTheScrew]

Clairybee I was just going to write that! Why teach a child a made-up word only to then have to teach them another, longer word. They may not pronounce it properly, but babies will still "get" what thank-you means. It's been one of the first things both of my children have said.
Alison would you say "ta" as an adult?

It really grinds my gears!

[Ninks]

claireybee I don't like "ta" either. I'm from a very working class background but nobody I knew / know says that! Perhaps it's a northern thing in which case I might teach it.

I prefer, "good girl / boy" if the child does something nice or kind, or even if they pause whilst holding your Blackberry over the lav without dropping it