... to think this parent is being a bit prescious, and this school a bit weak?

[mw14]

Speaking to a friend yesterday, I began to think I've turned into an old git, but on consideration I'm convinced I'm right. My friend has a daughter who is 13. For the first two indoor PE lessons of the term, she claims she forgot her trainers, and as a result, her teacher allowed her to sit out the lesson. The school were displeased though, and emailed my friend to alert her and ask for her support in ensuring she had her full kit. The girl got a talking to from her mother, but then, yesterday, her mother received a phone call from the school.

Apparently, she'd yet again claimed to have forgotten or lost her trainers, clearly expecting to once again sit on the sidelines. However, this time the teacher did the right thing, and ordered her to get changed into her PE kit and to do the lesson in bare feet. For some reason, this upset her, and she's since had the audacity to complain to her mother about it being "unfair" and "horrible".

I don't want to sound like a miserable old sod, but it's almost unbelievable on several levels. Firstly, that the school accepts "I have no trainers" as an excuse. Secondly, that my friend, like so many parents, has not got a proper grip of her daughter, and thirdly that she saw doing PE in bare feet as such a bad thing! AIBU?

[curiositykilled]

fair certainly does not mean treating everyone the same. It means considering everyone's needs. If it meant treating everyone the same then you have a kid in a wheelchair being asked to run the 1500m! lol

The kid clearly really does not want to do games, if you find out why you're halfway to solving the problem.

[MintyCane]

In some schools it is getting better in my opinion anyway. Our comp has an amount of sport per week that has to be completed by the kids but it does not have to be a team sport. Skateboarding, using the gym, yoga class trampolining, frisbee, cycling all count and can be done in clubs in school. Team sports are not for everyone and they do give choices in some schools now. Far less humiliation and screaming at the kids going on.

[minervaitalica]

Anyfucker - I agree with you that punishment is required because they girl has lied (twice) to bunk off. I am not sure many people would disagree with that.

But as Curiosity rightly pointed out - the teacher has not even tried to understand why the girl did something quite so stupid as lying twice (using the same lie) not to do PE.

So the problem will just present itself again - no one seems to give a toss about helping her to overcome the issue. That's why the teacher's response is weak imo

[AnyFucker]

you don't know that at all minerva, what makes you think no-one gives a toss ?

perhaps her mother ? and she will pass that "don't give a toss" approach on to her dd ?

who knows, but encouraging a disrespect of teachers is wrong, wrong, wrong IMO

you don't know what convo's there have been had with this girl

all you have to go on is what the Op said

I was reacting more to the awful attitudes displayed on this thread, subsequently

[higgle]

When I was at school we all hated games and gym because of smelly changing rooms, butch games mistress ( we thought doing exercise would make us look like her) and used to scive off all the time - sciving off from games is just a rite of passage really and if the girl is doing OK in everything that matters it is not worth the hassle of making life difficult for her. If she is an intelligent girl and really dislikes gymnastics she will be able to think up a better excuse next time round anyway - lost cause I'm afraid!

[mw14]

Most amazingly, my friend (the mother) has now written to the school to complain about her daughter's treatment! I told her that she's being ridiculous, but it didn't go down well...

[stealthsquiggle]

FGS - that will be her firmly on the 'neurotic parent' list, then

[minxofmancunia]

yabu it's up to the mum, pe is horrible, I got out of it with parents consent, spoilt, maybe? But I was being bullied so badly and pe was the worst time.

PE teachers were bullies, communal showers ughh! I for one would not be happy about dd being forced to wear 2nd hand trainers OR have bare feet in a lesson.

Other lessons are important ans obviously they shouldn't be allowed to skive them but PE, certainly when i was at school was a croc of shit.

And I wasn't lazy, did dancing, tennis, gymnastics outside of school and enjoyed it.

[minervaitalica]

Well, from the info I have got, no one (mother or teacher) has taken any step to help the girl - I can only comment on the info I am given, as in every thread.

I agree with you that disrespecting teachers is awful, regardless of what they teach - but that does not take away the fact that imo this teacher could have acted much more effectively (again, from the info I have been given, because that is what the OP gave me to go on).

The whole issue we act in front of our children wrt their teachers I am sure would give rise to another interesting debate...

[mw14]

Minxofmancunia, you say that you "would not be happy about dd being forced to wear 2nd hand trainers OR have bare feet in a lesson". I'm genuinley interested why you feel like that - what is so bad about it?

[Highlander]

school PE is pants. And it ain't PE - it's standing around bitching.

The best PE teacher I ever had came into our changroom one day and said this (I'll never forget it).........

"you're all totally emnbarassed about your bodies. You're all changing. Some of you have breasts, some haven't. Some of you have your periods, some haven't. You're all terrified of being out there with shorts on and your period arriving unexpectedly. You're all worried about the boys leching at you. None of you are interetsed in hockey. You can wear sweatchisrts and tracky bottoms to my class. But you're all coming out and we're going to have a laugh "

We didn't have to do things properly and we did have a laugh. Some days we did loads, other days we sat on the grass and watched the sporty people. it was like she understood how we felt.

PE is a total humiliation for teenage girls and they shouldn't be forced toi undress.

[pispirispis]

Even though it may seem to adults like us tand the PE teacher hat it's no big deal, the girl probably felt completely humiliated in front of her peers.

The PE teacher should be sitting her down and asking her gently and kindly why she is not keen on doing PE. As should her mother. Her mother should also check on the morning of PE day whether or not she has her trainers with her. She could also do some sport with her daughter to help build up her confidence and show her sport is not a bad thing.

[pispirispis]

God I can't spell. Haven't really read the thread, but have seen the mother has written a letter of complaint. That seems silly - she should be putting her energies into doing sport with her daughter!

[Stephief]

I dont blame the girl for not wanting to do pe. I hated it at school, all that having to get changed in front of each other, communal showers, being forced to be athletic (even if you are just not made that way!) or risk being ridiculed by everyone else in your class becuase you cant run as fast/as far whatever. I used to regularly 'forget' my pe kit when my school decided to make us do rugby, even took a few detentions for it, and forged notes from my mum when it came to cross country. I am not the sporty type (clearly) and found PE utterley humiliating. Thankfully my school ran a gcse dance class as an alternative from yr 9, so thats what I did!
If my daughter didnt want to do PE, I would be in no hurry to force her too. Its not being 'precious' its being understanding! But for some reason luckily my dd actually likes pe and has just signed up for cross country and hockey clubs after school (she is only 7 though, will see how long it lasts!) I think schools need to realise that while physical exercise is neccesary, school pe, for some kids, is just horrendous.
And if my child didnt have trainers on, I would be really annoyed if they were made to do pe in bare feet, not exactly safe with everyone else wearing shoes!