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AIBU?

to not give a S**t when my child is born

58 replies

beaniesteve · 27/02/2008 14:53

I am not pregnant but I am trying. If I have a Christmas baby, or a spring baby or a summer baby - I really don't care. I just want to become a parent.

A friend of mine has said for years 'oh I do hope you have a summer baby, that way you'll get all the summer off and it will be so much better'

I don't care! If I have to have a newborn in the middle of a long wet winter... I don't care! It is not remotely important when I have my baby! I just wish she would shut up about it. When I tell her I really don't care' she says 'oh but you will when you're stuck indoors with a small baby and can't go out anywhere'!!!!

OP posts:

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easterbunbuns · 04/03/2008 20:14

FFS people should be just glad they have a baby. Who gives a toss when its actually born? Some of the thickest people i know were September/october babies and some of the richest most intelligent people i know were born in August - it really does not matter life is what you make it not when you were born. What exactly is so wrong with a Christmas baby? - never did Jesus any harm (tee hee!)

beaniesteve · 04/03/2008 14:37

Hhrrrmmmphhh.

Someone in my family announced they were pregnant recently. Last night my mum called me to 'check you are ok' and then said (I think to make me feel better) 'At least you won't be having to carry a baby all though summer'

FFS - which numpty decided this was an acceptable thing to say to make a person feel better ?

OP posts:

spugs · 29/02/2008 18:30

i never started ttc with an idea of when i wanted baby to be born, just when it felt right to start trying. i ve got one whos birthdays early march, this one whos due at the end of march and dd2 whos birthday is the end of april. its a lovely time of year to have a baby but ive put no planning into the whole thing. i dont see the problem with people doing it though, my friend planned which month she wanted to get pregnant in so that it would work out with the summer holidays (shes a teacher) and luckily it worked for her first time. but i do think that people commenting about the time of year your babies born eg, auguast babies struggling at school very unreasonable

Squirdle · 29/02/2008 17:57

I obviously didn't do any planning as DS3 was born on DS2's 2nd birthday, a week before Christmas! DS1's birthday is the beginning of January as is DH's. It is hectic, but it doesn't matter.

Of course it doesn't matter when your baby is born or what sex it is, all that matters is that he/she is healthy.

Having said that, if I ever were to have another (not that I am planning on having one) I would probably try to avoid it being born around December/January

beaniesteve · 29/02/2008 17:04

Lol - A bit Cavalier?

I guess I have no idea what it is like to become a mum, and I am prepared to be completely shocked to my core by any arrival but I guess the attitude of my friend just irritates me because I really would like to get pregnant and I'm not about to wait until August (Deliberately) just because she thinks it is better

OP posts:

Sarahjct · 28/02/2008 20:21

Oh definitely hormonal beanie, but the weather made it so much worse (artificial light all day, stifling heating, visitors I hated, no fresh air, sitting on my arse a lot etc). I can't be the only new mother who thinks their darling LO will dissolve if a single raindrop falls on their wee head... I'm juuuust about getting over that now, sort of.

And for the record, I also thought the OP was being a bit cavalier about her new arrival!

beaniesteve · 28/02/2008 19:42

"Oh and was I the only person to read the thread title in horror thinking the OP meant she wouldn't give a shit when her baby was born as in she wouldn't want it (Sidge was a bit all confused...) "

AS if! ha ha!

Sarahjct - was it just the weather which made you miserable or do you think it was hormonal compounded by the environment?

OP posts:

Belgianchocolates · 28/02/2008 19:34

A bit late, but sige, I read it the same too. Only when I read the OP I realised she was talking about the time of year.
I have 2 winter babies 1 of which was due on x-mas day. Both were aimed for sept-oct as dp wanted our dc's to be the eldest at school [rolling eyes emoticon]. I supose he has learnt his lesson now and now were just trying, with no date in mind. Though far away from nov-dec would be nice as my 2dc's have no festivities for months and then everything, all presents, fall into 1 month, expensive and not so nice for them as they often get 2 small presents or 1 big for the 2 occasions.
As a mw I can say that sept-oct is a very busy time at work!
I would also hate to be due aug-sept because of the summer heat while heavily preg!
But really it doesn't matter all that much as long as baby comes and is healthy, the time of year is only a minor detail.

thefortbuilder · 28/02/2008 19:20

i also got told that if you have a boy you really want him in to be a september baby so that he isn't playing rugby against boys in the same year as him who are all much bigger - doesn't matter if he never wanted to play rugby

Sarahjct · 27/02/2008 22:29

Of course you're NBU. However... I had dd at the beginning of Jan this year and the first three or four weeks were miserable. I was already a bit depressed and it rained solidly the whole time so we couldn't go out. I sat on the sofa looking out at the grey horridness and really thought my life was over.

So I can kind of see where you're both coming from...

Sidge · 27/02/2008 22:24

Cheers Lyra

EiWishFor3MoreWishes · 27/02/2008 22:21

hey beanie you are most definitely NOT being unreasonable!! i always said i would not want a baby born in mid-winter but my DD was due 28th dec born 8th jan and i couldnt be happier she wuldnt be her if had put off trying to avoid an xmas baby!! a baby anytime of year is a joy so dont be put off by your friends negativity!!! xmas babies rock!! BTW!!!
xx ei xx

bookwormmum · 27/02/2008 22:14

I thought this was a protest against being induced at 39+1 or something .

LyraSilvertongue · 27/02/2008 22:12

Yes, that was just you Sidge

Sidge · 27/02/2008 22:08

Oh and was I the only person to read the thread title in horror thinking the OP meant she wouldn't give a shit when her baby was born as in she wouldn't want it (Sidge was a bit all confused...)

Sidge · 27/02/2008 22:06

Don't get pregnant at Christmas because the maternity unit will be absolutely wedged when you are due in September, you won't be able to move for babies

bookwormmum · 27/02/2008 21:55

Wallace - there is only about 6 weeks between my brothers birthday in early March and older dsis's birthday in early April with mine jammed mid-way in between them. My other sister has her birthday in September. I'm not quite sure what happened there . It does make Spring an expensive time in my family as ex BIL birthday is late Feb, my Mum's is early April and my niece's is mid-April plus there is Easter and Mothering Sunday to add to the mix. May is a good month as no one has a birthday .

bookwormmum · 27/02/2008 21:52

My dd was a June baby so she gets presents every six months (and more at Easter and probably Autumn as well). I think to her that's pretty good placement in the year as birthdays go - to her . It had never occurred to me that I might ttc (not that I was ttc) a better birthday for her .

bohemianbint · 27/02/2008 21:47

I try to conceive according to compatible starsigns. I'm only half joking. But I buggered it up anyway!

macdoodle · 27/02/2008 21:43

Well I mus be really "unlucky" I have a September baby (jee a whole extra year of childcare), and a Xmas baby....funny I conside myself twice blessed

WestCountryLass · 27/02/2008 20:52

I've got spring, summer and autumn babies and all I know is that when I had them I was jsut so glad they had arrived safe and sound, not when it was.

Divastrop · 27/02/2008 20:30

neicie-i had my ds2 in july 2003.i moved house when i was 8 months pregnant and we didnt have any hot water for a week,plus the older 2 had chickenpox,and we couldnt have baths

dd3 was my first planned baby,born in the spring as i had hoped,but she still got bronchiolitis in the november and ended up in hospital.as somebody said,babies and plans dont go together,and i certainly wouldnt dream of telling anybody else when they should have a baby.

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BabiesEverywhere · 27/02/2008 19:45

I was pregnant through the Summer heatwave of 2006 and due again in summer I must be mad.

LyraSilvertongue · 27/02/2008 18:58

The other disadvantage of having an August baby is that their birthday is in the school holidays so a lot of their friends are on holiday when they have their party. I end up inviting the whole class just to make sure he has a decent number coming.
Having said that though it's nice to be able to have birthday parties in the garden or some other outdoor venue.
Just a few things to consider.

melpomene · 27/02/2008 18:55

It's not unreasonable for an individual to decide that they would prefer their baby to be born in a particular season.

It is unreasonable and insensitive to expect others to share your preference, or to tell them they will have a tough time if they have a baby in winter.

I aimed for (and got) 2 spring babies. If I'm chatting to someone who's expecting in spring I'll tell them that it worked out well for us, but I wouldn't dream of suggesting that anyone else was likely to have a negative experience if they have a baby at another time.

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