For context - I'm a SAHM for the most part with a bit of PT evening work mon-fri, we have one at school and one nursery aged DC who is currently at home with me.
DP works FT mon-fri and often in the office in the evenings for an hour or so to prep for next day.
DC2 wakes up around 6am and often wakes DC1 up , it's before anyone needs to be up really. They usually go to DPs side and climb in bed with us as he seems to be the current favourite parent and he takes them down puts TV on and gives them a drink and then either comes back to bed for a bit or does a home workout. I get up and give them breakfast / get them ready for the day / do school run.
He did the same yesterday and last night said he thinks he'll have a lay in today. I said ok cool I'll get up with them. DC2 woke up on his own this time about 5.30 am (due to the time change I think), came into our bedroom and climbed in bed as he always does, pretty much straight away DP got up and took him downstairs, I didn't say anything. Then for some reason DP decided he was going to sleep downstairs on the sofa, dc1 went down to join them and after a while I heard DP telling them off and raising his voice, they were playing rough together and disturbing his sleep.
He sent them back upstairs and they went to play in their bedroom, I went in to see them and they asked if they can have a bath so I've just popped them in for a bit.
I have a feeling there will be lots of huffing and puffing today and he will be in a foul mood and talking about how he's so tired and didn't get to sleep properly and so on even though I think he didn't even really give me a chance to get up and then decided to sleep on the sofa? AIBU to think it's his own fault? I'm prepared to be told IABU, but he could've given me a nudge if I didn't react fast enough this morning even though I really don't think that's the case, if he really wanted to take DC down but wanted some sleep after he could've just come back to bed and tell me he's going back to sleep and I would've gone down, I told him I was more than happy to get up, it's like the only acceptable solution was for me to leap out of bed immediately or he was going to do it and now be in a mood.
He's working tomorrow but has taken the rest of the week off to spend time with DC during half term and I'm happy for him to sleep in everyday if he wants. I don't shirk from getting up but he's just stared doing it one day a few weeks ago and it just fell into that pattern as we didn't really talk about it.
So AIBU? Did I not react quick enough?
AIBU?
AIBU? A laying in one.
snapthesnap · 25/10/2020 08:38
[quote QueSera]**@MJMG2015* are you the OP? 
All the things you mention are normal things for a SAHM. The DH gets up with the children during the week and then goes to work* - it's not like he's doing nothing all day.[/quote]
Of course I'm not the OP. that poor woman is probably sobbing in the corner somewhere because you lot think she's lazy when actually she's fucking run ragged while captain underpants takes the children downstairs, dumps them in the sofa while he naps or does a workout & thinks he's done 'his share' for the week.
She's not complaining he does fuck all
(She should be) she's complaining because if his attitude today when HE caused the problem by getting up in a huff when he didn't need to move so much as an eyelid. He chose to deviate from there normal routine by not cuddling the kids in bed & just getting up HIS doing, not hers, for fuck only knows what reason, but given she was anticipating his huffy mood I'd say he's pretty bloody good at making life all about him.
He doesn't 'get them up' every morning. He just takes them downstairs, leaves them on the sofa while he does a work out then makes HIS OWN breakfast.
The OP gets up 15/30 minutes later & sees to them & does everything thing else in the house 24/7 as well as works.
@MJMG2015 are you the OP? All the things you mention are normal things for a SAHM. The DH gets up with the children during the week and then goes to work - it's not like he's doing nothing all day.
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He does almost all the get ups. So having asked for a lie in, and knowing that they always go to his side first, you should have been up straight away, preferably before they got in with him.
I had that with dh. He'd agree that I could have the lie in, then it would take me twenty minutes of saying to him "are you getting up?" and him saying "yes", then another ten to twenty minutes of him getting up. I would then be fully awake and be just about drifting back to sleep when one of them would run in to tell me they'd put their own sock on or something exciting like that. It's lovely to be the favoured one at times, but first thing in the morning is not one.
Whereas I would roll out of bed and have them downstairs without him doing more than roll over.
Eventually I pointed this out, and he did get better, so now if I say to him I need a lie in, he's pretty good. Normally.
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