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AIBU?

First day at nursery- not happy with them

60 replies

Khtchkn · 10/08/2020 22:40

I’d just like some advice and how you would feel. It was my sons first day at nursery today and I’m feeling quite upset about what happened. I take him to what’s considered a really good nursery in my area, so I thought I’d have the confidence for him to go there and the staff to look after him. They have an online parent zone app where they update what your baby gets up to. The very first thing they posted was what meal he had for lunch and next to it they wrote “ate nothing”. LO has a v big appetite so I called them straight away as I was worried and they said they’d try again later. They didn’t update me, but they posted other stuff they gave him eg “crackers and cucumber”. I don’t think this is enough for a baby that is there from 9am - 5.30pm.. and LO eats mushy food like spaghetti bol or Shepard’s pie, fish pie, easy chewable food. he can’t eat crunchy food like crackers and cucumber he just spits it out. it really annoyed me that they wrote “ate nothing” as surely they’d want to reassure the parents of their child’s first day at nursery and when I saw that it worried me. I’ve been told by other mums their nursery update everyday so much stuff and also pictures of them and what they get up to. But they just sent me a picture of some books on a table, and some toys laid out without LO??. So I don’t even know what he did. the whole day I was thinking irrationally “they haven’t posted anything bcos that means he’s constantly crying so they don’t want to show me”. When I picked him up and asked how his first day was they didn’t explain anything and said “some times he was sad, sometimes he was happy”. Nursery fees are ridiculously expensive and Im not sure if I’m expecting too much but would you be ok with this? It just worried me how dehydrated he was and that he ate barely nothing throughout the day and had a big dinner when he got back home as he was obviously hungry...

OP posts:

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Am I being unreasonable?

326 votes. Final results.

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You are being unreasonable

81%

You are NOT being unreasonable

19%

purpleme12 · 12/08/2020 00:40

I'm sorry but this thread really made me chuckle with the 'getting a bunny' and all the bunny comments so thanks for that really cheered me up

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Ladybirdlashes · 12/08/2020 00:47

How old is your ds? Has he not had any settling in sessions? 9-5:30 is a very long first day at nursery!

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Smallsteps88 · 12/08/2020 01:03

“Ate nothing”

Will be because he is in a new environment with a million far more exciting things around him than what’s on his plate. Think of all the new faces he was getting to look at never mind the toys and activities of the rest of the children. He will get used to it and find his appetite again. Relax.

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Wilko312 · 12/08/2020 01:04

I don't think YABU really. I get annoyed with our nursery at times. When the kids joined we were told we would be sent photos throughout the day of what they were up to - never transpired. They also sometimes forget to give DC their lunchtime bottle, which we supplied in their bags.

We pay a lot for nursery, probably not as much as you, but a lot and I'm often astounded about how little they have to tell us about about what DCs did during the day 🤷‍♀️

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ToLongNow · 12/08/2020 01:25

Would you rather the nursery not tell you the truth?

How old is your baby? Is nursery aware that he doesnt eat crackers and cucumber?

I worked at a nursery, and the children were very different than at home.
For example, They ate all there veg, but never eats it at home.
Didnt drink milk but has it at home.
Always goes to sleep well after lunch but doesnt at home.
Doesnt share, but at home does....

Honestly a child can be very different in the home to what they are like at nursery.

It was babies first day, it was very hot .

If under 18 months, It will be 1 member of staff to 3 children.
If you want 1:1 , you will have to employ a nanny

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M0mmyneedswine · 12/08/2020 07:39

I would prefer them to be spending time with the children than constantly updating an app

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SteelyPanther · 12/08/2020 08:13

I pulled one of mine out of nursery because it didn’t suit him, there was nothing wrong with the nursery.
He was a big sleeper but wasn’t able to have a nap in the corner of the nursery as no one else at his age was napping, they played loudly all day !
Plus, he liked a sandwich for lunch but they did cooked meals like fish pie. He wouldn’t eat it.
So every time I picked him up I had to take a sandwich. He would wolf it down and then go to sleep.
Nursery just didn’t suit him so I pulled him out for his own sake.

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SweetMeadow · 12/08/2020 08:39

I completely understand where you are coming from OP.

I would’ve expected a more detailed update on the first day and to feel like the nursery were available and willing to give you an update at any point during the day. It’s an important transition for everyone.

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Happymum12345 · 12/08/2020 09:06

As much as the apps can be of comfort for this parents, every message they send out is time taken away from the child. It takes longer than you would imagine writing & updating messages.
It was your child’s first day-this is completely normal.

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SummerHouse · 12/08/2020 09:19

Some seriously bad advice on this thread. DO NOT HIRE A BUNNY! Lord we found out the hard way. Ours was very anxious, twitching and running around for no apparent reason (I am not convinced he didn't have some sort of drugs problem). The final straw was when he ate his own poo. Not a good example for LO. Never again!