Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Unflip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Unflip

1 2

AIBU?

AIBU to feel that this level of aggression was excessive?

48 replies

HouseSaleIssue · 06/08/2020 22:08

I took my family to an attraction yesterday to ease school holiday boredom. A man in front of me started screaming at the top of his voice saying I had got too close. I feel really bad that I must have inadvertently broken social distancing and I of course immediately apologised. However I still feel physically sick with fear at the level of aggression. I have been having problems with memory and multi tasking and find it difficult in shops to deal with the task in hand and following the arrows. A moment's lapse in concentration and I find I am going in the wrong direction for the path of arrows. I am wondering really if the difficulty I am having is a normal or not. I am trying to observe social distancing, but am struggling.

OP posts:

Report

romeolovedjulliet · 07/08/2020 17:22

@mosquitofeast

fearing for his life, wtf ? he sounds a complete knob, it wouldn't have happened if you were a man he wouldn't have dared.

Fear for his life? Bollocks

You have heard of corona virus I assume?

of course i've heard of it, i've had the damn virus but this guy over reacted, a complete tosser, nt people do not go around screaming at other people and as i pointed out he wouldn't have done it had op been a man.

HouseSaleIssue · 07/08/2020 10:47

I actually feel tearful of how nice posts have been. I realise that I made a massive error and expected people to say I got what I deserved.

OP posts:

TwentyViginti · 07/08/2020 08:29

I have gone down one way systems the wrong way. I have got too close to people. All accidental, and I've seen others do the same.

If that bloke was so scared - why was he at an attraction? Hardly a necessary outing!

He was just another aggressive twat.

ShebaShimmyShake · 07/08/2020 08:10

People in fear of their lives shouldn't be going to attractions.

My experience of shouty and aggressive men is that they'll use any available issue to justify their inherent desire to be shouty and aggressive.

IceIceCoffee · 07/08/2020 07:53

One of the most horrid things to be shown in this pandemic is people thinking it’s ok to shout at strangers because the stranger accidentally got too close.

Grumpymum789 · 07/08/2020 07:53

Sounds like he used it as an excuse to be aggressive and act like the big man. Shouting is likely to spray spit / particles everywhere, so he was in the wrong for that.
However, you must try to be mindful to keep the 2m away and not drift up to people. These measures are in force for a reason. I have asked, and I stress asked, in no way shouted or raised my voice, people to stay back to 2m in queues when they were constantly moving upto me, every time I went forward to create distance they came even closer. I don’t want people hovering right next to me.

itsgettingweird · 07/08/2020 07:40

Well there's 2 things.

The level of aggression was unnecessary. He has every right to point out if you are getting within 2m but there is a way to do it. Perhaps you weren't the only one he had to tell and copped it for everyone due to his frustration?

Second point is you need to see a Gp. If you are struggling to be able to multi task and concentrate and follow arrows etc then clearly there is an issue.

At any point the issue needs sorting but more so now because you really do need to be able to do these things when out as they are likely here to stay for a year or so.

HouseSaleIssue · 07/08/2020 07:34

Thank you all do much for your kind words. I am immeasurably grateful.

OP posts:

redcarbluecar · 07/08/2020 07:29

@popcornlover I don’t think OP has said it’s the first time she’s come across an angry person. That would indeed be a blessing for an adult.
The anxiety is understandable. We don’t expect to even be addressed by strangers in public most of the time, never mind shouted at by them. I’m not a particularly ‘anxious’ person but was shouted at a few months ago re social distancing (similar-sounding person I think!) and was a bit shaken for a while. I think this whole situation has changed some people’s feelings about going out. OP, hope this thread has helped to reassure you/rationalise your feelings a bit.

Love51 · 07/08/2020 07:20

There was no call for him to shout like that. Round here I've heard people just say 'social distancing' but that tend to be to people they know. Mostly people take responsibility for themselves and move if they aren't happy with where people are. Speaking isn't out of order, becoming aggressive is. I've heard loads of stories about people being aggressive since lockdown began, people aren't coping well with stress.

Mummyoflittledragon · 07/08/2020 07:19

@popcornlover

OP, surely you can’t feel anxiety about going out because of this man? Things like this happen all the time, there are lots of assholes out there.

You’ve lead a very sheltered life if this is bothering you to the extent you’re writing about it here and feeling anxious to go out. You should consider your blessings that it’s the first time you’ve ever come across an angry person. Weird how people want to be a victim constantly.

What a sweeping statement. What about abuse victims? What about disabled people? This story is very frightening for me. I certainly have not lived a sheltered life. And I have no desire to be a constant victim.

lifeafter50 · 07/08/2020 07:03

You may have put him in fear for his life
Oh how ridiculous!
If he is that fearful, he should not be going out.

popcornlover · 07/08/2020 07:00

OP, surely you can’t feel anxiety about going out because of this man? Things like this happen all the time, there are lots of assholes out there.

You’ve lead a very sheltered life if this is bothering you to the extent you’re writing about it here and feeling anxious to go out. You should consider your blessings that it’s the first time you’ve ever come across an angry person. Weird how people want to be a victim constantly.

Bluebellpainting · 07/08/2020 06:50

Absolute overreaction on his part. No need to shout and as for someone saying he could be fearing for his life is a load of rubbish. I’ve had someone stand less than 2m from me when in a queue- I have not shouted. Just asked them to please move a step back so that we are 2m apart. No rudeness on either side, he apologised and stepped back, I said no need to apologise and thank you for stepping back. It was civil. Maybe I’ve been lucky but there is no need to be rude scared or not.

LittleMissRedHat · 07/08/2020 06:46

You may have put him in fear for his life.

If you are so worried about catching the virus then you don't go on a jolly to the aquarium...

doityourselfnow · 07/08/2020 06:41

He was being a complete idiot, I presume you weren't trying to snog him? So I don't think you posed him a massive threat. Best he stays home in future.

redcarbluecar · 07/08/2020 06:30

He was being a twat - there’s never any need to shout aggressively at someone. You probably weren’t the first or last that day.

labyrinthloafer · 07/08/2020 06:11

Given what you say, I would suggest you switch to online shopping and focus on using the energy going out for nicer things. Also do quieter things, no one will suffer if they don't go to busier places.

And yes speak to your GP.

5foot5 · 07/08/2020 00:15

Fear of his life? Load of arse, just another aggressive man. Bet he would have reined in his mortal terror and not shouted at a larger man.

Yes this exactly. If he was so scared for his life why was he out at a popular attraction? Sounds like an irrational, aggressive dickhead

HouseSaleIssue · 06/08/2020 23:29

You are all very kind. I am trying so hard to make sure it doesn't happen again. So hard in smaller shops like Aldi to keep 2 metres from others.

OP posts:

Comtesse · 06/08/2020 23:14

OP yanbu - the bloke was completely out of order. @mosquitofeast fear of his life? Yeah right, maybe he shouldn’t go to a public attraction if he’s so anxious and panicky. Sounds more like an arse to me.

MaxNormal · 06/08/2020 23:14

I feel bad for you that you had a nice trip out spoiled like that

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Email address

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Teal99 · 06/08/2020 23:12

People are using covid to act like dicks. There is a lot of anger, they think they have a valid excuse to let rip. This situation has brought out the worse in people. It makes you realise how thin civility and good manners are.

Leflic · 06/08/2020 23:08

Weirdly, I’ve been hearing lots of shouty men lately.

I’m in a very “ niace” town but saw a man full on screaming at his girlfriend in the street, one if our neighbours is shouting everyday and there’s been several incidents in Tesco’s ( normally unheard of). The level of mouthy aggression in parks and pubs is noticeable.

I was thinking it might be down to the more civilising parts of society not being out as much.

HouseSaleIssue · 06/08/2020 22:57

It was a tricky environment to social distance in as very limited space.

OP posts:

Unflip

1 2

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.