To think the teen should sleep out on the boat

[Orangeblossom78]

rather than me?

We have a small old sailing boat which DH has done up, an old kit boat from the 1970s. A project.

It's quite small- for two really to sleep on- but at at a pinch, and with a tent affair another two can sleep out on the back of it. It's pretty unpleasant though, hard, like on a bench, and cold too..

Anyway talk of going away on it for a few days is filling me with dread. I'm mid 40s, perimenopausal, nearly to get my period and back got worse in lockdown. Baths seem to help a bit.

DC are not small anymore- they are 11 and 15. Two boys. DH thinks I am being mean to suggest perhaps the teen could sleep outside so I could have the space inside with the younger one.

I feel it is mainly them who are keen to go, so that is kind of fair? AIBU and mean?

[timeisnotaline]

Don’t go! Yes to telling them it’s because of your period. Yes to booking them all (or threatening to) a yoga retreat. Hell yes to Don’t go!

We used to hike and camp, I taught my dh to hike and camp. There is no way the kids would be inside and me outside If they were teens! It’s be more like cabin for me , poss dh and any under 10s and a tent for the rest

[managedmis]

Is it me? Is the boat in the water or in a yard somewhere?

[HermioneMakepeace]

Sod that! I wouldn't be going and actually my teen DS wouldn't be, either. He's even more prissy than me. He hates his clothes getting dirty and as for using a portoloo... forget it.

Stay home, OP. Get yourself some and and spend a lovely evening on Mumsnet !

[jessstan2]

I'm concerned about your back, op. Do you know what is causing your back ache and are you having any treatment for it?

[Defenbaker]

Good decision OP. Enjoy your staycation and please report back afterwards. It will be interesting to hear how the "boys' trip" went, and how well they slept (or didn't) afterwards.

My parents had a 30ft motorboat, with one large 5 berth cabin and a seperate tiny toilet which was like a cupboard inside. We had many family holidays on it, but it always felt very cramped and claustrophobic. As a teenager I begged them to let me stay at home alone, and they finally relented when I was 17. That said, it is lovely being out on a boat when the weather's sunny - day trips sound like a better option for you.

[jessstan2]

A 15 year old might actually like sleeping on deck, they can usually sleep anywhere.

I don't think the op sounds like hard work at all, she is being expected to go on a miserable holiday with inadequate accommodation. It wouldn't suit a lot of people and I don't know why she is even considering it.

[QueSera]

I do think it is mean of you to want your 15yo DS to sleep in a highly uncomfortable situation.
If as you say it "is mainly them who are keen to go", why don't you just stay home? You do sound a bit like hard work OP.

[allthewaterinthetap]

Urgh. No, it would be awful. I'm also 40's and would have managed fine 15 years ago but not now.

[Caplin]

There is no way I would contemplate getting on that boat. Tell them to crack on without you.

[Tavannach]

Good call OP. Enjoy your yoga.

[jessstan2]

@Cherrytea

Maybe ive missed some of the thread. I love boats. Go, why not. I love being in the sea. Although, slept in some very small cabins and not on the deck. I would not say no though

That's you! You are not the op. We're all individuals and she doesn't fancy it. I would hate it.

Quite honestly, I don't know why the op is even considering it given the circumstances. She'd have more fun at home alone.

[UnshakenNeedsStirring]

Just stay home!

[Cherrytea]

Maybe ive missed some of the thread. I love boats. Go, why not. I love being in the sea. Although, slept in some very small cabins and not on the deck. I would not say no though

[Orangeblossom78]

It's actually much warmer than camping. If it is sheltered in a bay then Ok for the bobbing. It will be much better with the bigger boat

Oh and i said I'm not going, but not to let me stop them. So they might go and I hopefully will get a bit of peace. Lots of nice baths and yoga

[LST]

Is it not really really cold off the water? Do you not Bob about all night? We have a little motorhome and we'll be away now every weekend until the weather gets really crap.. but I don't think I could do a boat!

[tilder]

Calling out casual sexism makes me a snowflake Happydinosaur53? Interesting.

[forrestgreen]

Find a b&b nearby

[DearTeddyRobinson]

Your DH sounds more enlightened than mine OP, all I'd have to do would be to mention the possibility of it being 'that' time of the month and you wouldn't see him for dust .
I think you just say, look love, my back's playing up, I'm due on, it will be really uncomfortable for me. Why don't you take the lads and have a manly weekend of eating sausages and forgetting to brush your teeth, or whatever it is appeals too him. But I would 100% sit this one out.

[BindTheWobbinUp]

@fflelp

I sleep outside for most of the year anyway so I have lots of tips on how you could make it comfortable and warm

Huh? This sounds interesting, can we have a whole thread on that, @fflelp ?

I probably should start one but I think a lot of people would think I'm crazy and I'd out myself straightaway as my friends and family know about it. I'm the only person I've ever met who does it - out from the middle of March to the end of November.

I really want to know about sleeping outdoors too.

[Hopeisnotastrategy]

Wild horses would not drag me there, especially on a period. YADNBU.

[Dozer]

He might himself be happy to sleep on the deck, but if he’s considerate should understand that you don’t wish to do so and would find it uncomfortable / painful.

Ask him to reschedule and for the DC to sleep outside. If they’re all still keen to go, that’s good. If they don’t fancy the prospect, that proves your point! And that they were all inconsiderate to put your comfort below their own!

[Happydinosaur53]

I can see that the snowflakes haven't read the full thread. The only reason we've called it a boys holiday is because the OP is female and her DH and DC are male. Therefore if the OP decided to stay at home then it would be just the males attending boat trip. No one has said that a boat trip is just for boys.

[Mrsjayy]

My dds would have been up for it at that age me however

[BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz]

It's only a "boys holiday" in so much as the single female is opting out of the trip.

It isn't a "boys holiday" at the exclusion of all females.

[Mawbagz]

Urgh stay at home!!