Who is BU in this scenario please?

[AmIReallyThough]

Ok I’m aware this is ludicrous but I feel I’m losing the plot and can’t see the word for the trees. Who’s out of order here?

Background: Just turned 14 yr old SS, SDad and Mum. Been together 8ish years and always been some tension between SD and SS, growing now in teenage years. I can’t see the woods for the trees but all I know is it’s making me deeply miserable.

Newish puppy. SS struggling with puppy biting toes etc and isn’t consistent with how to deal with it which can make it worse. Puppy is biting his toes. He says he was holding his foot up to get away from dog, SD says he was wriggling foot making dog think he was playing. SS getting worked up. Following plays out:

SD: put your foot down on the floor, we’ve told you not to do that. You’re wriggling it.
SS: I’m not!
SD: You are, you’re moving your foot around and he thinks you’re playing
SS: I’m not, I’m just doing this! (Holds foot up)
SD: (dog has let go now) You were! You were going like this! (Wiggles foot)
DD: I wasn’t!!! (Getting more irate)
SD: I’m not lying!! (Also getting more irate)
SS: Well yeah you are!!
SD: (Shouting now) How dare you call me a liar?! I am not lying! Don’t you call me a liar!
Mum: Stepdad! You need to get out! (He had to go back to work). We don’t even use that word ‘liar’. You’re the one who brought it up! He shots back-you need to speak to him! How dare he call me a liar!!!
SD: Goes up to SS, points his finger in his face and says: I don’t care what your mum says, don’t you DARE call me a liar!!! Storms out shouting at me that SS is out of order and how dare he! I tell him he’s out of order actually.

I told you...crazy! But one of very many similar heated exchanges...am I wrong? So fed up of it all

[Chickychoccyegg]

we dont know the ins and outs so hard to judge, but i have a 14 and a 16 yesr old and they can be absolutely horrible sometimes to me and their dad, they could argue blue was red when in the mood, i guess you'll have a better idea wither ds was being an arse winding up sd, and sd overreacted or if your dh is just a nasty twat all the time to ds? your dh comes out of this badly regardless , so i would be considering if this relationship was worth it for yourself and your son

[birthdaybelle]

Woah. Gaslighting!!

[birthdaybelle]

I think don't look at it as stepdad and stepson and think about how you'd feel if his dad acted like this