To be a little worried about my five year old

[HannahBanana87]

She’s five and a half. Oh I know she’s only little and she is who she is. She is wonderful. She is kind and funny and affectionate and my best little pal in the whole world.

She is in P1 and one of the youngest in her class. She has made some friends at school but she’s very “young” compared to a lot of the girls in her class. Loves Paw Patrol, dolls, that sort of thing. The girls in her class are all into LOL dolls, zoom chats and drawing (DD enjoys drawing but her attention span is very short).

The latest thing is that we are trying to teach her to ride her bike without stabilisers. It’s a nightmare. She’s too frightened of falling off. The minute I let go of the bike her feet come down and she wobbles to a stop. Three full days at it and no improvement shown.

In the meantime kids a good year or two younger than her are cycling past her. Then we met a boy in her class who said “my bike is much bigger and I’ve been riding without my stabilisers for ages”. DD is too young and naive to feel any shame about it, thank goodness.

I know she’ll get it when she’s ready and I have no intention of trying to make her something she’s not. At the same time I don’t want her to be left behind. I don’t want her to be made fun of for being the baby.

Her three year old sister demonstrates a great deal more courage and independence than she does.

[Waveysnail]

It's hard having youngest children the class. My first was oldest in the class and you could really tell up until around p6. My other children are youngest and I do feel like they are forever playing catch up with older kids in their classes - some of whom are nearly a full year older!

[Playdoughcaterpillar]

She’s 5! The other kids sound abnormal to me. My 11yo still plays with her dolls and only recently into FaceTime etc. Chill and enjoy her being little.

[Covert20]

Balance bike. Two wheels but no pedals. They’re magic.

[atimetobealive]

My son will be six next month and hates riding a bike with stabilisers so god knows how I’ll get him on a bike without them

[BohemianChastity]

have you thought of trying a balance bike? My eldest couldn't get the hang of a normal bike for years so we bought a balance bike and it was fab x

[howdidigettobe50something]

As others have said, all children develop at different rates and your little one sounds like she's doing absolutely fine. Please try not to worry about her or compare her to others as you really have nothing to worry about. My eldest ds developed good coordination and physical skills at an early age, probably ahead of expected milestones. DD, however, didn't walk until18 months and only learned to ride a bike just before she was due to have her cycling proficiency lessons in Year 6!(... she really did cut it fine😁). However, she's now at Uni and it certainly didn't hold her back! Youngest dd was probably somewhere between the 2, but I can't really remember exactly how old she was... Something to do with her being the third child perhaps 🙄

[SunshineCake]

Don't put your dd down. By saying her younger sister is braver does just that. You wither accept your child or you don't. Leave her be.

Don't want her to fit in. Want her to be her own person.

[MoltoAgitato]

Most of that zoom nonsense is driven by some parents who want to rush through all the best bits of childhood to make mini versions of themselves. My 2nd child is the same age as yours and nowhere near riding a bike (older child was pedalling happily by 3 years...)

The best thing about lockdown has been my children being far more free to be who they want to be, not who their peers think they should be. It’s really hard but just enjoy your DD, she sounds fab!

[DodgeRainClouds]

My daughter learnt to ride a bike when we realised she was scared of falling off onto concrete. Short grass is the way to go!

[chubbyhotchoc]

I think my dd was 5.5 when she learnt to ride without stabilisers. Admittedly we hadn't much pushed it. She's still very young and paw patrol is totally fine. Mine got a lol dol when she was 5 and Only looked at it for three seconds. She's now 6 and still wanders around the house with a stuffed rabbit. They're still babies really

[WWYD00]

I've not read the thread in its entirety but both my sister and I played with Barbies when we were in secondary school. Granted the games were more mature and we mainly made clothes for them but we used to love getting them out and making up outfits etc. I would have died of embarrassment if any of the school found out. I don't think a five year old should care about zoom personally

[Richiwa]

My 8 year old still prefers many shows on CBEEBIES to any of those on CBBC. I have never ever suggested that he is too old for them. There really is no such thing as a toy that is too young for a child. At different ages they can play with exactly the same toy in completely different ways. I have three children, all of primary age and they still have “baby toys” they play with all the time. The chewy keys for teething are now house keys. The baby activity centre is now used as a control panel for the space ship or pirate ship. The dolls house is used by everyone as a hide out, an alien planet, a school and even - sometimes - a house. The stacking cups have been repurposed for their cafe/kitchen playing etc etc Meanwhile the oldest child’s Lego kits get used by the youngest to make “walls” and he likes to set up battles with the chess set, even though he can’t (yet) play. They are just toys and children will use them in whatever way fires their imagination. After all, even LOL dolls are just dolls, but with branding.

[Richiwa]

Oh yes and I also was definitely still playing with Sindy when I went to secondary school and I was still heavily into Lego at 13 (I still rather like it now).

[DoctorHildegardLanstrom]

DS is 8, still can't ride a bike, he will get it at some point.

Sleeps with 16 billion cuddly toys, he is still very young is some ways and in other ways he is so grown up (he can make me a cup of coffee for example and he has just finished informing me how to fix my laptop)

[Haribolover]

My DD is P2 but December birthday so a year older then your DD. She still plays with dolls especially with her younger sister, Paw Patrol is "now for babies" but that's really only come within the last 6-9 months. Riding a bike we're nowhere close-her balance is rubbish and she was 5 before she managed pedals! Academically though she's bright so it's just her. I don't want her to grow up too quickly....

[Moominmammaatsea]

We live in a famously hilly town on the Tour de France/Tour de Yorkshire route and it feels like babies here leave the womb knowing intuitively how to ride bikes. On the other hand, there is my DD1. I nearly bankrupted myself buying balance bikes, Frog bikes and Isla bikes in the hope that this would be the model to get her going. I spent countless hours and (secretly) wept tears of frustration in the park trying to teach her how to ride a bike so she could keep up with her peers and not be judged or ostracised.

It was only my elderly mother pointing out that she’d managed to live a very fulfilling life to the ripe old age of 75 without ever having learned to ride a bike - and nor had it resulted in any loss in her social standing - that I got a grip.

DD1 is now 12 and still can’t ride a bike but she is a smart and quirky girl who is a very talented artist and she is thriving at her super-selective Grammar school (well, she was when it was open!). More to the point, she doesn’t care that she can’t ride a bike because it’s just not important to her.

[Dee1975]

I wouldn’t worry. Children develop at different stages. My 8yo is very young emotionally and loves playing with toys younger than her peers. Quite shy too and scared of everything! My 6yo in the other hand is the opposite! Took my eldest ages to ride a bike without stabilisers. Yet the youngest was doing it at 3 and a half.
They will all catch up and find their way. Don’t compare.

[MrsNoah2020]

Her three year old sister demonstrates a great deal more courage and independence than she does

Maybe the 3 year old finds it easier because she naturally has better co-ordination and balance? Maybe she doesn't have the maturity/intelligence to be scared, whereas your older DD does? If you put adults who have never ridden a bike on one for the first time, most of them will be scared. Why shouldn't your DD be nervous?

Also, have you got your DD"s eyesight checked? If she is short-sighted, this can massively impair co-ordination, and it's hard to pick up in young children because they don't realise anything is wrong and often learn to compensate.

[TankGirl97]

Please don't worry about the bike thing. My 7yo has just learned during lockdown (we've been trying for years to get him on a bike). Days after he finally started, his younger brother learned instantly and is already doing tricks! They are all so different.

[Kaykay066]

Forget the bike for a bit, move on to something else and revisit
My son has never mastered a bike he’s 9 soon he can’t peddle forwards and steer and is petrified of Falling off. So we got him a scooter and he loves it, my nephew at same age could ride without stabilisers at 3 but my son is not my nephew and can do thinks my nephew can’t.
Your daughter sounds amazing and lovely she will ride her bike, eventually. Work on building up her confidence and self esteem it’s hard work but you sound a lovely mum to care this much.

[Richiwa]

I also would never call a toy a baby toy (maybe sometimes I would say a particular toy always creates with babies in mind) and if a child of mine ever tells me that some thing is babyish I always query what makes them say that and challenge their thinking. The same if another child tells them that something they like is babyish. I really don’t get why any adult would tell a child that something they enjoy is babyish. I find it bizarre.

[Richiwa]

always create = was created

[tempnamechange98765]

Can I ask exactly what it is you're worried about? A behavioural problem? Or that she'll be picked on?

I only have sons, and my eldest is a year younger than your DD, but nothing you mention that interests her sounds anything but age appropriate. And the bike thing again I don't think is unusual. I have limited experience with children but a friend has a little girl who turned 7 in the autumn and she only started riding without stabilisers around that time.

[Doggodogington]

She sounds like she is growing and maturing at a lovely pace OP. Don’t rush it, kids come along at their own pace and they are only little once x

[1forsorrow]

I was 32 when I learned to ride a bike, much to the amusement of the kids nextdoor. She'll be fine.