To be “peopled out”

[Sexnotgender]

Having a down day and I think I’ve realised it’s because there’s someone here ALL THE BLOODY TIME.

I love my family but dear lord what I wouldn’t give for a few hours solitude.

[Supermarketworker06]

My dh went back to work this week and tho we get on very well, and have done through lock down, it's nice to be able to listen to what I want on the radio (the Jeremy Vine show being a particular flash point!) I went out for a walk on my own every day this week and could walk at my normal pace, i.e. fast! I went shopping on my own yesterday, it was lovely.
We've got a few years to go before retirement but I'll definitely be encouraging both of us to get a volunteering job somewhere separately!

[ToriaPumpkin]

Oh! This is me! I need time alone to recharge and I'm used to having at least one day a week in the house by myself on my day off from work when the kids are at school. I'm still working three days a week but on the days I'm home, instead of getting time to get my head in order I'm having to listen to DD (6) needing constant attention and input or trying to help DS (8) with school stuff or listening to DH who is a raging extrovert and struggling with working from home and not having human input. My fibromyalgia is flaring and I'm constantly overstimulated and buzzy and it feels like my brain is melting.

I'm going to the supermarket today. It will be a combination of wonderful peace from "mummy, mummy, mum..." and also hideous over stimulation due to the noise and people.

[BogRollBOGOF]

I go out running to have a good theraputic sing, but it's not relaxing in my home.

[BogRollBOGOF]

I'm used to the school day to myself. 10 weeks now I've had DH home full time. It's 7 weeks since he walked to Screwfix giving a two hour break from the house. He's barely leaving the house due to his bastarding hayfever which is at its peak. Meanwhile I have a 7 and 9yo (admittedly this could be far, far worse and thank the Gods there isn't a bastarding toddler in the house) but there are still plenty of moments like earlier this week when Minecraft and real life clash, and DS1 clawed DS2's skin off because DS2 had virtually pushed hin into some lava.

I need some space. DH has comandeered the spare bedroom as his office, and I just float around the gaps. We bought a TV for our room days prior to anticipated lockdown and DS2 tends to escape into there when he's fed up of DS1 obsessivelybwatching the Smithsonian Channel's documentaries about the Cold War or hours of Minecraft youtubers.

I really feel like I'm existing, floating around the periphery of my home, functional only for tempestuous attempts at inflicting an education on my darling offspring, and feeding the ravenous sods. I can not be arsed to clean. I'm not houseproud anyway, but there's no space to bang out some tunes and find my drive and plough on with it, because it will be undone within minutes.

I miss having Popmaster blaring out in stereo across the radios in the house ( DH constantly on work phonecalls and DS1 has sensory issues). I'm done on people noise and don't have the energy to please myself, and try to be quiet but have the constant roar of my tinnitus.

I've really hit the wall this week.

[EmpressLangClegInChair]

It all sounds hellish. I wonder how many relationships won’t survive lockdown?

[Kittenlicker]

I’m the same. ‘They’ find me everywhere. I can’t remember the last time I was on my own. I’ve taken to hiding in the shed.

[marshmallowkittycat]

I'm with you. I'm at home all day with my sons (3&5) and the lack of peace, personal space and their constant need for attention. The 3 year old is struggling with lockdown and very clingy. It's can't wee or get a glass of water without being followed or whined at.

[KindlyFOD]

OP, I totally feel you. I love my family, I really do, but there are 4 of us (adults) cooped up in a tiny house (1 small sitting room, nowhere else to sit) and honestly? Some days I could just cry. There is no escape, and at the moment nothing to look forward to. I'm silently desperate, whatever that makes me.

[TwilightPeace]

I refused to let him and the children come running with me, I don’t need an audience and want some space on my own “oh but I thought this might be a nice family opportunity”.

I hope you stuck to your guns!

[MrsEsss]

"My mum worked 4 days a week all her working life and when my dad retired she was really pissed off he was interrupting her quiet day"

Reading this has truly made me fear for the day my DH retires! I really need proper time on my own. There are days when he's around on my days off and he'll reassure me that he'll be busy in the garden or something but it's still not the same because he's in and out of the house telling me how he's getting on, or knocking on the window asking for a cuppa. If pisses me off.

[HemlockStarglimmer]

YANBU. Love my husband and child but need to be alone in the house every now and then. In normal times when a day off work is midweek and coincides with my husband’s one day a week in the office it’s bliss.

But Sod’s law being what it is half of those days are ruined by his medical condition preventing him from leaving the house or our daughter having another migraine and not going to school.

I was so looking forward to them going to stay with family for half term next week 😭😭

[Sexnotgender]

I need restaurants!!!!

Totally. I had a big snotty cry the other week because I wanted nice food that wasn’t cooked by me.

[lilgreen]

I’m very grateful to have teens who sort their own breakfast and lunch. I cook most evenings and it’s nice to come together.Feeling quite bored now. Everything is organised, spring cleaned. Work tomorrow on school rota for a bit of relief from my house!

[BamboozledandBefuddled]

I’m heartily sick of planning, buying and preparing what every fucker in the house will be eating for EVERY. SINGLE. MEAL

It’s EXHAUSTING.

A million times this. As well as me and DH, there's all DM's food (I'm her carer). I am so bloody sick of thinking about meals, shopping for food, preparing food and making highly complicated shopping lists that allow for at least 25% of what I want not being available. I'm genuinely struggling to eat some days - food's lost all it's appeal. I need restaurants!!!!

[AmICrazyorWhat2]

I’m heartily sick of planning, buying and preparing what every fucker in the house will be eating for EVERY. SINGLE. MEAL

That's exactly it, @Sexnotgender, it's the additional household drudgery that's getting me down! Not just meals, constant washing up, cleaning, tidying, plus wfh.

DH has inconveniently broken his arm and badly bruised the other (I'm sympathetic, but it was a really daft accident that caused it) so I also have to shower/dress him and bring him everything. He seems to be enjoying having a personal servant.

[Newcatmum]

I feel exactly the same. On my own with 2 children, one of which is a very demanding, bad tempered 3 year old. She touches me constantly and follows me around the house. Trails food around the house, if she's not following me while I'm cleaning a room she destroys the other rooms.

She's also started waking at night after being an excellent sleeper since she was a baby which is just the icing on the cake as I look forward to the few hours of peace at night once she's in bed. She is making my older child miserable because of her tantrums and I dread having to go out for shopping because she screams in the car.

I had a really bad couple of days over the weekend and cried constantly. She's actually not been too bad today compared to usual but there are days where I am fantasizing about a child free couple of days.

[GettingUntrapped]

I'm suffering badly with this. Two children, alone with them. Their mental health seems ok, mine is me feeling like I could fall to the floor any minute because their isn't enough of 'me' left to hold myself up. Immense suffering.

[stayathomer]

I was saying the other day I felt bad for a friend who is an extreme extrovert and is on her own through this, talked to her on the phone and she said 'god I feel so bad for you, you must be ready to kill for some peace'

[RollaCola84]

I haven't had a non-virtual or socially distant conversation or any physical contact for 64 days, want to swap ??

I get it, I'm an introvert who needs my alone time to recharge but this is getting a bit much even for me.

[Sexnotgender]

I’m heartily sick of planning, buying and preparing what every fucker in the house will be eating for EVERY. SINGLE. MEAL

It’s EXHAUSTING.

[CloudPop]

What's for lunch?
What's for dinner?
What's for lunch?
What's for dinner?


...... and repeat.

[EndothermicHands]

I'm finding it exhausting. Im working long hours in a hospital at the moment and DP is furloughed with pay topped up by his employers to full. When I get home or have days off I just want to be alone but for DP it is socialising time as he has been alone all day.

It's getting very tedious and he's not even attempting to socialise e.g. zoom calls, phone calls etc with people outside of the house.

[Lovelydovey]

We’re not going back to work until at least September and sounds like our children won’t be going back until then too (not priority years). At least 3 more months of all being stuck together and passive aggressive comments from DH whenever I try and sneak a few mins to myself - I refused to let him and the children come running with me, I don’t need an audience and want some space on my own “oh but I thought this might be a nice family opportunity”. And I hate the fact one of us has to work in kitchen - I hate him disturbing me when I’m working in there and I hate him glaring at me if I dare go in there when’re working in there.

[JigoloHarMegiddo]

Oh @Blackbear19, the Universe is properly against you isn't it? @MrsKoala, I totally get having to listen for the bad screams / door / dog being stuck anyway in case DH can't deal with it for any reason (client call / stuck on the phone doing tech support for FIL / watching an interesting film 🤬).

@NatalieLollipop - no shed! 😭 and the garage is where the ice creams and the exercise equipment are, so there's usually a teenager in there!

[Blackbear19]

Even my bath the other night was interupted by small person falling out the bed.