I arranged a sleepover and the parent went out!

[Bythebeachtoo]

Don’t worry it’s not as bad as it sounds but it bothered me and I don’t know if it should.
My son (aged 9) begged me for a sleepover at other boys house and after talking to his mum we agreed and made the arrangements. I later found out that the parent went out for the evening and left the children with a trusted family member but someone I don’t know and have never met. This was never relayed to me and wasn’t part of the agreement. Would you arrange a sleepover and not be there?

[redwoodmazza]

When my DS was at school, I'd share after school care with another Mum as our DSs were in the same class and aged about 6 or 7.
I ensured her DS was always within earshot of me [whether in bedroom or garden] so I could make sure they played 'nicely'. I always knew where they were and what they were up to.

Naively I assumed she did this too.

Later I found out that she would have a bath and leave her 13-year-old daughter in charge! Not agreed by me!
Also her DS [very well built] would block his bedroom door to prevent my DS from getting to the bathroom.
But the worst was when my DS son in passing said something about another child's garden. Transpires the other Mum had decided it was OK for her DS and my DS to leave not only her garden [where I had assumed they were playing always] , but the cul-de-sac AND along another road to the other child's house!!! She had the gall to tell me that they couldn't be kept in cottonwool forever! I explained I was well aware of that BUT it was MY decision and NOT HERS about when my DS was allowed anywhere on his own.
Needless to say the arrangement ended!

[lilgreen]

Sorry was supposed to be a new thread!!

[FatPantsON]

Does it bother you as much as arseholes commenting on a three month old post bothers me?

Do you realise how you sound just there calling people arseholes for not noting a date? And for assuming that you get to determine when a fairly recent thread becomes unsuitable for responding.

Also do people realise then they're patting each other on the back shouting ZOMBIE AND CANCEL THE CHEQUE that you are actually bumping the thread?

For fucks sake you are not the thread police.

[ArnoJambonsBike]

Does it bother you as much as arseholes commenting on a three month old post bothers me?

[Atadaddicted]

I’m quite relaxed
But yes - this would bother me a great deal

[ilikemethewayiam]

Absolutely not acceptable. I fell out with friends over this exact scenario. They invited my son aged 7 for a sleep over, then went out for the evening and left them with their teenage son. My issue wasn’t whether he was trustworthy or not. My issue was with them withholding that information from me. We never spoke again which is fine. They were deceitful.

[Feedingthebirds1]

Just cancel the cheque FFS

I was going to say the same. I recognised the OP as soon as I read it. So people, at least cancel the cheque before you post.

Two months might not count as a total zombie thread, but it's not an ongoing issue. It came...it went.

[Regularsizedrudy]

I would be annoyed. I don’t care how “trusted” they are, if I don’t know them my kids aren’t staying with them.

[louderthan]

Just cancel the cheque FFS

[loulouljh]

I definitely would not do that..I would be responsible for the child and would not pass that onto someone else.

[LillianBland]

@user69

Her partner? one who lives with her? I wouldn't have a problem at all. I don't think all men are bad though.

And I don’t think all posters actually pay and heed to the numerous ZOMBIE comments! Ffs!

[lilgreen]

Your

[lilgreen]

YANBU I wouldn’t be happy. You should be told first. You were entrusting you’re dc to people who were not going to be the ones doing the looking after.

[user69]

Her partner? one who lives with her? I wouldn't have a problem at all. I don't think all men are bad though.

[LillianBland]

THIS THREAD IS OVER THREE MONTHS OLD! I IMAGINE THE OP HAS DEALT WITH IT!

[Waveysnail]

Does the mums partner live with the mum? So it's his house too?

[Saracen]

Never, not without consulting the other parent - and I would give plenty of advance notice in case they wanted to rearrange without disappointing the kids.

My teen was once babysitting for a couple of preteens and discovered on arrival that she was also expected to look after a sleepover guest in the parent's absence. Neither the guest nor the guest's parent (who had already dropped the child off) had been informed either! That didn't go down well.

[ThePluckOfTheCoward]

ZOMBIE, ZOMBIE, ZOMBIE THREAD

[Msmcc1212]

That’s not on without checking with you first. You have left your son with someone you trust. You don’t know the other person. They are most likely fine but could be a threat.

[Whosaysyoucanthaveitall]

100% definitely not acceptable. If something had happened you’d look like a bad parent not knowing who was looking after your child.

[SummerDayWinterEvenings]

No not happy unless it was an emergency

[SirVixofVixHall]

I am very careful about sleepovers. There are a number of women on here who were abused on sleepovers when they were children, so there is that, but also I like to know that the parents are sensible, and have smoke alarms etc.
I would never go out if I had a child round for the evening, and certainly not without telling the other parent what the situation was ! (Obviously if an emergency happens that is different, I would still try and contact the other parent if possible).

[OscarWildesCat]

Read the bloody dates, it’s months ago and been unearthed for whatever reason. I think the OP will be over it by now 🙄

[FatPantsON]

Is two months a "zombie" ? I don't think it counts.