What's the most ridiculous of astonishing lie you've ever heard?

[SingleSidedShoulderShrug]

Just genuinely interested! Mine is that a colleague of mine told us her dad had died. So good she go home early? Of course we said he's who wouldn't say yes to that.. shame she didn't tell her dad he was meant to be dead or that she'd left early to grieve him as he picked her up as usual. Came in to ask where she was... we were like umm.. she's grieving you ? 😱

[TooGood2BeTrue]

£350 a week for the NHS with Brexit

[LesLavandes]

I had a friend who was proneto saying ridiculous things
, but the best one was an evening I was meeting up with her. She never showed and days later when she eventually made contact, she said sorry but on her way to meet me a man had stopped her, put a knife on her back and said she had to go to dinner with him 😂😂😂

[TooGood2BeTrue]

£350 million a week

[DuploTower]

That their sister had been caught up in Manchester bombing, and that's why they couldn't come to work (was a live in job) everyone had their private doubts for 3 days before I caught someones eye after she had come down to say she needed the night off again as she had phonecalls to make. It was obviously bullshit. I still find it hard to believe someone would do that.

[LaBelleSauvage123]

Why do people do this? I have experience of this too at work.

[dottydoofoo]

A colleague said she was arrested for drink driving because she had eaten a bag of wine gums 😳

[GnomeDePlume]

I had a colleague who insisted that she was living with a particular man and was step mum to his DCs. In reality (other colleagues living in same village) he was living with his wife. She was just a layby bunk up at lunchtimes and living with her parents.

Her lies annoyed people but at the same time they felt sorry for her.

[Isleepinahedgefund]

Whenever there is a newsworthy terror incident or natural disaster, my brother will have a friend who either died there or witnessed it at close and very dangerous proximity, depending on size and number of casualties. 9/11, London tube bombings, London nail bombs in the 90s, 2004 Tsunami, Manchester Arena, London Bridge attack, Australian bush fires, to name a few. It's a dangerous business being his friend, it really is.

I'm still in touch with three of the apparently deceased friends by the way 🙄

[AnneElliott]

I used to work with a girl who told whoppers. The final one was when she went AWOL, when HR finally cut off her pay, she got her 'mum' to ring up and say that "x had been kidnapped".

[Jaxhog]

The plastic uterus is the winner imho.

[FourDecades]

@Davincitoad She also told me she had a hysterectomy yet went on to have a baby a few years later and denied that was what she actually said.

Maybe she meant hysteroscopy

[FourDecades]

@twoshedsjackson what did the parents say about the circumcision? Sometimes a re-do is necessary to tidy up the first procedure...also they sometimes just stretch the foreskin to see if that will work and then do a circumcision if it doesn't

[Cary2012]

"I haven't got my homework miss. I did it, but when my dad was dropping me off to school a car went in the back of us, and dad grabbed my homework out of my bag to write down the other guy's insurance details"
Little liar, dad picked him up that afternoon, in car without a mark on it.

[ChristmasCarcass]

Kid my DH went to school with told everyone he was actually Italian. Even made up an Italian-sounding name for himself, which he claimed was his birth name before he was adopted by English people (ie his parents).

Unfortunately because it was the 1980s and he was 11, the most Italian-sounding name he could think of for himself was Gino Ginelli. Like the ice-cream. So that backfired a bit.

[FourDecades]

@johnwayneisbigleggy l actually can believe that to be true. I have seen some dreadful cockups in my time working in the NHS

[NeverDropYourMoonCup]

The number of women I used to live near to who had all been told aged 14-17 that they would never, ever have any children and there was no point in ever using contraception.


Strangely, they all seemed to have between 5 and 8 children.


Fertility clinics are obviously missing a trick there, as it seemed to work like magic.

[Rhapsodyinpurple]

I had a friend who claimed that her dad was killed in an accident, she got time off school and lots of sympathy. When I saw him a few weeks later I asked him how he was and he had been in holiday and felt fine.
Why lie like that?

[Hadenoughofitall441]

Heard so many I couldn’t possibly pick.... that’s what happens when you work in retail.... colleagues and customers 😂

[5zeds]

@Bezalelle

[dwum]

My batshit SIL told my BF that DH and I couldn't conceive and so she had offered to carry a baby for us.


And then was surprised that BF told me..... (We have been BF for over 20 years!)

[MargeSimpsonswig]

@Biscuit, being trapped in the living room because of hand cream is priceless 🤣🤣🤣

Most of the stories on this thread sound like they are sociopaths. My ex (a sociopath) called in sick at work claiming his sister had died when he was actually hungover. Something has to be seriously wrong with you to lie over the death of someone else, especially a close family member.

[FunnysInLaJardin]

a girl I used to work with told the court that her 2 yo daughter had died as a reason why she couldn't attend an earlier sitting.

Her daughter hadn't died and I can't think of this girl in the same way again. How could she claim her daughter was dead as an excuse

The court report recounts it all. She should be so ashamed.

[MaxNormal]

Brexit.

[HeronLanyon]

Mine came from my lips
I’m afraid. Decades ago dp
And I both ‘gave up’ smoking. So came home unexpectedly when I was having a sneaky fag in the garden. I literally said ‘no I’m not’ when it was in my hand alight. I think I just panicked. We both burst out laughing it was so ludicrous.

[SingleSidedShoulderShrug]

Once I had to call in sick for my first ever night shift at my first ever job
😳 I had to call in sick not because I was sick but because my dp now DH has dead bolted the door on his way out to conference so drove off to London we lived in a small Cheshire village.. I got up had a really nice leisurely day then decided to go and get lunch so I opened the door and realised the dead bolt was on, tried the sash window at the front by the tv.. nope glued shut. Tried the back door, yep I could get out of the back door into the yard. Then I could climb the wall and walk out of the ginnel to the the street! Winner! So off I hopped down the wall. Got to the gate at the end of the ginnel. It's fucking locked!!

So I walked back to the wall climbed it and then fell off the top, so by the time I got back into the house I was covered in scratches and brambles.

Went for a shower cursing the man who locked me in the house! Got out of the shower to a really loud knock at the door.. it's the police!! So I had a nice chat through the letter box with 2 police officers who thought it was hilarious, they had to ring dp at work to verify the naked woman covered in scratches talking through the letter box was meant to be there 😳😳😳😳😳😳 but I think work thought i was lying