AIBU to expect childminder to have more children?

[LifeAndSoulOfThe]

Apologies as the title may sound a little rude, I’ve been looking for a childminder for my daughter. We have found one who is lovely, the only thing is she will only have one baby (DD) then 3 other children who are between 1.5-3, now I like her a lot but I’m worried about a small group of children and none are her age.

Thoughts please?

Agree @Chamomileteaplease

I have no idea but a quick google suggests 6 maximum but only 3 under 5? Perhaps someone will have a better idea. That was results which came up.

I am a childminder and I have to say that babies learn so much more from older toddlers and preschoolers. We go to morning groups where they mix with more babies their own age too. Also the preschool age children develop kindness and empathy to the babies at my setting. Win win in my opinion.

No, of course it wouldn't concern me that there were no other babies.

You're not seriously expecting your baby to be interested in another baby of the same age?

YABU. And you're not listening to everyone telling you that CMs have certain ratios to which they must adhere.

Go for a nursery place if you want loads of babies around your baby, although I cannot see how it can possibly be an issue for you.

No guys. I’m simply asking whether it would concern you to not be mixing with similar aged children?

No.

1. Because my child would likely learn a bit more off slightly older children.
2. If it was a concern I would look for a nursery where my baby would be with other babies.

Before nurseries and childminders there was family. Which was obviously of mixed ages.

I might prefer the ages to be close - so not baby + four year-old. but on the whole it wouldn't be a problem.

Do you have friends with similar age children? Does the childminder go to playgroups and such with her mindees?

No.

I’m simply asking whether it would concern you to not be mixing with similar aged children?

But she won’t be mixing with similar age children even if the CM could have more. By the time she’ll be ready to mix with other children her age the ratio will be bigger.

It wouldn’t be my preference hence my child goes to a nursery- would it concern me, no, it’s the correct ratios!

@TheMustressMhor I am listening as I’m not questioning why the ratios are in place, I’m
Asking if it’d bother you, re-read the question if in doubt!

It wouldn't concern me at all. My 1yo DD prefers watching older children it seems anyway and she certainly doesn't play with other babies the same age. They basically just steal toys from each other and push each other over. By the time she's actually old enough to play with other children, she will be with others of a similar age anyway, surely?

My DD went to a childminder from 9 months, obvs she was the only baby, and as she grew up and the older children started school, younger children started and it has been great for her - means she can happily socialise with children older & younger. She is Y2 now and is still friends with the children she was there with.
A great environment and I felt happier with her being in a much smaller & stable setting, particularly at that age, than in a bigger setting with less 1-1 care & relationship building.

We are not allowed 2 under 1s unless they are twins and have to stick to our ratios. Otherwise ofsted will take our registration away from us. X

No guys. I’m simply asking whether it would concern you to not be mixing with similar aged children?
Umless there are special circumstances cm are not allowed more than 1 child under 1yr old.
Why would this concern you?
Babies do not play with other babies.
In fact toddlers do not play together they play side by side until around 3yrs old.
Cm will give your baby more 1:1.time than a nursery can.
What exactly are you expecting from a cm?

Having reread the question I still come to the same conclusion, OP.

It would not bother me.

Out of interest, why does it bother you? In what way do you think your DD will be disadvantaged in the setting you have instanced?

No it would not concern me they learn a lot from their peers x

Didn't worry me. My childminder took my baby to baby and toddler classes so had ample Opportunity to mix with children their own age.

One of the Bonuses of sending your child to a childminder is that it's more like a family environment

And yes, I think my DD gets far more from playing with older kids at the moment. When she's around my nieces and nephews, they do loads with her - last time we saw my 3yo niece she was showing my DD how to do a puzzle and was involving her in all her creative play and my DD followed her everywhere! When we are at baby classes with just other babies, DD isn't really interested in them - she just goes for the toys!

I think this concerns me because, some of my friends DC have gone to nursery or CM & gone up to school with their friends from both. DD may not, it’s my first baby so maybe I’m over thinking this.

Your dd will have all of the other children fussing over her and will love it and as she grows they’ll love playing with her even more. It wouldn’t worry me as a parent.

No I would rather my child be the only baby as they require more physical care. Being around older children may help her teach her milestones quicker as she looks to copy other children. If you would prefer her to be around other babies then you would be better with a nursery setting. Tbh at that age children mostly play in parallel to each other and not actually interacting with each other anyway.

*reach

OP - I mean this very sincerely - your baby is not going to make friends with other babies. That just isn't what babies do.

Same for toddlers - even more so, actually.

I think people have misunderstood your question, you’re not asking ‘would you be concerned about a childminders who only had 1 baby’ but rather ‘do you think going to a childminder where they’re the only baby rather than a nursery with babies the same age will have a negative impact on my baby?’

I think there are pros and cons to both nurseries and childminders but honestly I don’t think that not having other babies the same age is an issue at all. Babies don’t care about interacting with other babies and as most families will only have 1 baby at a time it’s not like this is the norm for babies. By the time your baby is a toddler and old enough to play they will be under a different ratio so the childminder can have another of a similar age, but actually I think relationships with children who are a bit older or younger are more beneficial to young children than peers of the exact same age. Your baby will learn plenty from watching and later interacting with the older children.

It’s likely your dd will have other children her age joining her once she’s over one. Lots of people don’t have a childminder until they go back after a years maternity leave.

Baby is how old? I'm assuming under 1?

Baby doesn't need to be mixing with other under 1's.

Soon baby will be over 1 and will then fall into the "3 children aged 1-3" and then will be mixing with children her own age. It matters much more at this age than younger.

I have baby twins. I don't bloody blame her for only wanting 1 at a time