AIBU to be upset my sister deliberately regifted me a present I gave her?!

[SweetSmellingAlstroemeria]

I opened a birthday card and present from my sister today to find she has regifted me a pair of earrings I gave to her over a year ago. It's not an accident as she wrote in her card "I know you'll like one of your presents as you told me so & you were right they're not really my style. Can you guess yet?". The other present was some bath oil (I rarely take baths but unlike her I would be too polite to tell her this, and I'm sure I'll use it up over time). We have never had a discussion about her not liking the earrings. They were part of a Christmas present in 2018 so all I can think is perhaps when I gave them to her I joked that if she didn't like them then I'd have them, although I have no memory of this. I'm not upset she didn't like them, just that she has regifted them to me. If she had told me she didn't like them at the time then I would have happily offered to get her something else instead. Surely she could have re-gifted them to someone else or given to a charity shop rather than giving them back to me? She has a good job and is financially comfortable so money isn't an issue. She can be quite blunt whereas I admit I'm quite sensitive, but AIBU to be hurt and annoyed by what she did? She's bound to roll her eyes and say I'm being overly sensitive if I say anything but I cannot understand how anyone thinks this is a nice thing to do to someone on their birthday!

[bakedbeanzontoast]

Would you have picked them for yourself? If so it's not so bad. If not it's a bit crap!

[Lippy1234]

I don’t think it’s a big deal, you’d already said you liked the earrings. I would however knock buying presents for each other on the head as neither of you seem to be receiving gifts you are happy with.

[Arthritica]

I disagree, I think you’re making a fuss over nothing. You bought them, presumably said you liked them. She didn’t and rather than buy some random thing (or try choose something when you clearly have different tastes) she gave them back to you.

It wasn’t done to be catty, it was pragmatic and presumably well-meant.

[GetUpAgain]

If I gave my brother a present he didn't like but knew I did, I'd be very happy to get it on my birthday. I would see it as thoughtful. (Both my brothers are lovely people without a mean bone in their bodies. I realise this doesn't apply to everyone)

[DarklyDreamingDexter]

Definitely save your money and don’t push the boat out for her ‘big’ birthday.

[TheReef]

Give her the bath oil back next year with a similar 'whitty statement' in a card

[TildaKauskumholm]

Yes, seems rude, if she is so direct she could have told you at the time that she didn't like the earrings. Give her the bath oil on her birthday, or use this as a good reason to stop exchanging gifts.

[Elle7rose]

Alternatively hand the bath oil back and say you prefer showers?

[Elle7rose]

You're not being overly sensitive- she's being blatantly rude!

Hand them back with a 'Sorry sis, when they say 're-gifting' they do mean to other people (or a charity shop would do) and not back to the person who gave it you- that's a tad rude' note!

[Toomuchtrouble4me]

I think its okay -she didn't like them and she knows that you do - and she's your sister, its fine.

[WhereTheCowsGoBong]

FrenchW1fe

regift them back to her I like your style

[PyongyangKipperbang]

I agree with regifting them back. You're just carrying on the joke, right?!

[SummerBreezemakesmefeelfine]

Agree as another has said, use it as an opportunity to stop exchanging gifts. We did this in our family years ago and agreed to just buy for the kids.

[Inappropriatefemale]

In front of everyone at her party!

[2020BetterBeBetter]

I do like the earrings but I've already got some very similar ones so think I'll just donate them to a charity raffle and hope they find a new home!

Don’t donate them to charity, give them to your sister for her next birthday.

[TheMustressMhor]

It's bad enough when people write that they have been "gifted" stuff.

It seems even worse when the same stuff is "regifted".

Yes, I know it's a real word. Well, "regift" is not, actually.

Not sure what the point of this post is, OP. Sorry.

[SweetSmellingAlstroemeria]

Forgot to mention the earrings I originally gave my sister were not the main gift. The main gift was a £45 top which would normally be about the limit I'd spend, but I saw the earrings and they matched the top design so thought I'd get them too as was feeling generous. Clearly that backfired! The earrings were an extra £17 so not mega expensive but thought they complimented the top and would make a nice outfit.

[WalkingWithTheBuffalo]

It's a bit weird that she gave them to you as a present. I'd have just given them to you. On the other hand I just gave my sister some great earrings for Christmas and if she'd give them back to me I'd be delighted.

[messolini9]

Turn it into a sisterly joke and regift them back on her birthday.

@Frenchw1fe, you remind me of a tale of a family, where a brother gave his sibling a tea tray - may have been a wedding present, but (I am sorry not to be a v good storyteller here) there was some 'in joke' about the tray, all good natured, & it ventually got regifted back to the brother.
Various high jinks ensued, with the tray being gifted around the extended family in increasingly inventive ways - it became a running joke who would be the fool to unwittingly get lumbered with the fabled tea tray ...
Eventually the family booked a long haul holiday en masse.
Arriving a night, they ate & went to bed, & in the morning the biggest prankster opened his curtains, eager for a view of the cityscape. Taped to his window was the tea tray :)

OP might relieve her hurt feelings if she took up a similar level of prankery ... but more seriously OP - rather than feel hurt, try to look on it as just a difference in outlook about the importance of gift-giving.

[Inappropriatefemale]

Yeah I’m with pp, no pressie for her from you, she doesn’t deserve it.

[LemonPrism]

I'd find this really rude tbh and I'm not at all sensitive

[SweetSmellingAlstroemeria]

@daisychain01 sorry didn't tag you correctly above!

[MyuMe]

I wouldn't get her anything for her birthday.

Technically she didn't get you anything for yours. She didn't buy the earrings...you did.

Bath oil isn't expensive and you don't have to get her something back now she only bought you bath oil.

[SweetSmellingAlstroemeria]

daisychain01 nothing major I can think of. To be honest it's been a rough couple of months as had an ectopic pregnancy and thought she might make a bit more of an effort. I always ask her what she wants for Christmas or her Birthday but if she can't think of anything then I choose something. If I'm buying a gift for someone then I try to get something they will like, but obviously the earrings didn't hit the mark. To be honest she's not a very thoughtful person and has forgotten my birthday before, or sent a card/present late. I imagine she just found them in her drawer and thought they'll do. She has a big birthday this year so was planning on pushing the boat out on a nice present but this has put me off!

[CSIblonde]

That's a bit tight. I wouldn't buy her stuff like jewellery any more as you've obv got very different taste. Get her something bland that anyone would like, house stuff like a large potted orchid or candles.