To not tip when eating out?

[JemimaPuddleDucksPuddle]

Saw a thread on another board that mentioned tipping when eating out and whether or not you should. The majority of posters seemed to think of a person as being tight fisted or ungenerous if they don't tip. I disagree and don't tip as a matter of routine, only if the service is exceptional. AIBU?

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

I have a cautionary tale; we were at Harvester for breakfast last week, four of us. I paid on my card and had a tip ready (as the waitress was really excellent) - and she pointed out that the card reader interprets the pin number as a tip if the automatic gratuity isn't cancelled (if the server isn't on the ball). She said that she had to refund double-figure 'tips' several times and now she's wise to it.

As I said, she was excellent and the food is great at this particular restaurant.

It's a divisive subject but it only seems to be the ardent 'tip for whatever service in a restaurant' that feel they have to justify their actions by criticising others who don't/won't follow suit.

I'll carry on doing what I do without fear. Staff who commit assault to paying customers by spitting in their food or otherwise, get caught out. It's so disgusting that ranks will never be kept closed and when it hits the news the restaurant is done. No more business, no more tips.

[Maemae06]

To be honest I don’t get it.why do we feel the need to only tip waiters/waitresses? There are plenty of jobs where people earn minimum wage and we don’t tip. I hate America when it’s compulsory...just add it on the price of the meal! Here I just round up so if the meal was say £28 I’d leave £30.

[Unihorn]

Positive reviews in my (chain) restaurant are normally shared with the whole company in biweekly emails and the person often gets a bottle of wine or box of chocolates sent for them from HO. Sometimes we run competitions specifically around positive feedback, especially through social media these days as it's a good drive for business. It does also genuinely make a difference for us to know that we've made someone's visit a bit nicer!!

[Summersunshine2]

For all the waitresses/waiters on this thread - do you appreciate a positive mention on review websites? Can you use this on your 'cv'/ to get another (better) job?
Maybe if people don't want to tip this could be an alternative positive move, as it's always nice to be nice .
For those of you saying if you can't afford to tip you shouldn't eat out - just no! So poor people aren't entitled to eat out too?!

[MurphyDog5]

When at home in the UK I generally don’t tip as unless employed illegally then everyone should be getting at least minimum wage, if I’ve received excellent service & feel inclined to tip I always ask the server whether they get to keep the tip/how it’s shared if they not get to keep it, I don’t leave it. Overseas where restaurant staff are often paid poorly I tip in line with local custom.

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

Nettie1964, the staff have to buy their own food?

No, not really. Do you know that most people have to do that? Every day?

A waiter or waitress is supposed to do their job well. A really good one is still doing that same job. There is a limit on what they can offer doing the job, there isn't much scope to increase wages, not without promotion/change of job. That's what everybody else has to do.

I'm getting a bit fed up with the 'poor waitress' syndrome that's cascading down the thread. I visit the same restaurants often, get excellent service - and tip really well. I'm not going to do that in a restaurant where somebody is merely doing their job because largely, there's nothing remarkable about it.

To be quite frank there are a lot of other occupations that deserve tipping - and can't receive them.

Just as an aside, hotel breakfast staff - usually brilliantly efficient and I'd tip them.. but they can't have tips. Pitch up for dinner and they feel entitled. It's really annoying and often they can't compare to the excellent breakfast staff.

I tip hairdresers too - and hairwashers - but not the hairwasher yesterday, she was dreadful. No tip.

So, if you like to chortle in the kitchen and bitch about your customers, knock yourselves out.

[Xsavanah]

I used to make 5.60 for my wage a couple of years ago because I was under 21. I had rent and bills to pay so saying there's a fair minimum wage is nonsense.

And the worst customers were the ones that think their server doesn't deserve a tip, but would waste my time, demand all my attention and also behave incredibly rude.

I can't imagine not tipping and I do feel like you can't afford to tip you should eat somewhere cheaper. Also if you think 5.60 is fair or enough... just no.

The waitress gets paid to write down your order and carry the food from the kitchen to your table. Other than that, doing it with a smile, singing happy birthday, arranging half on half pizzas and changes to the menu, checking up on how your meal is, anything beyond serving your food is not actually her job. So YABU as it's usually people who don't tip who expect the best service. Middle aged Karens who sit down at the dirty table when there's 10 clean ones and treat you like you only have them to look after.

Luckily none of my friends are tight like that and I've never had to feel embarrassed going out for meals.

[Nettie1964]

Can you afford to tip? I now live and work in Ireland now. I am a chef. Wait staff might earn minimum wage but often get charger for food uniform etc. Don't tip if you don't want to. But if you find a restaurant you like and visit often tip. You really wouldn't like what the staff are saying about you in the kitchen and it will make a difference😁. Seems miserable to me a really good waiter or waitress can make a huge difference. But then again I don't know if you are asking about the local Chinese or a Michelin star restaurant 😁😁

[MsTSwift]

We check with staff that they receive the tips themselves

[Petlover9]

Restaurants that add service charge really annoy me, at the end the waiters look expectantly at you even though 12.5% has been shoved on the bill. They probably don’t realise that for some people a meal out is a treat that has to be saved up for. I always do a review on the well known site and always mention that I think it is downright cheeky. If I could slip the waiter a few pounds I would not mind so much but having it added is wrong and I rarely return. They should price the food at the price they want to be paid. You would not go into a supermarket and find the bill “loaded” at the till

[bellabasset]

HMRC have made many alterations to the tax system so that any income paid to the business is subject to deductions for VAT and staff are paid through a payroll system with Er's NIC paid. I'd like to see the service charge outlawed.

Technically if income is unearned, ie a tip or tronc then NIC doesn't need to be paid on it. There are several schemes but if tips are handled by a tronc master they have to pay these net of tax to staff and keep records accordingly. Guests putting tips on a card are paying the business rather than the staff.

If you want to leave a tip then pay it in cash, 5% extra in the pocket is welcomed.

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

There's an idea, Rattail, we'll (the ones who don't want to tip for mediocrity) will stop eating out at all. Fine by me. I can cook, or order a takeaway. What will the waiting staff being doing when their jobs disappear because hospitality industry is teetering as it is?

Some people really don't see beyond their noses. Tip if you want to, it's not your job to drum up tips from others.

[Rattail]

For 16-17 years minimum wage is £4.35, I can't see why you shouldn't tip, if you can't afford a few pounds extra for tipping then you probably shouldn't be spending your money eating out.

[Mordred]

I tip around 10% in restaurants unless the service has been shite and i know it's going to the staff directly (I ask). I see no reason to stop doing it.

[NorthbyNorthwest22]

I used to tip all the time but after realising where that tip goes sometimes iv stopped.
My daughter wanted to take a group of friends to the cinema for her birthday a few years ago and we followed that up with a visit to a well known pizza establishment for a pizza making session.
The girl running our group was fantastic! Nothing was too much trouble so when i came to pay i asked if she could take extra for a tip. She said no please dont as the tip never comes to the staff it goes direct to the company! She actually said she would rather we left feedback online and mention her in person as that goes in her favour for future promotions. I did do this and having spoken to friends it seems this isnt unusual.
I do still occasionally tip if service is outstanding but always ask who gets the tip before i leave it

[Tamrastarr]

The beach supermarket I go to in Rhodes has a jar on the desk for tips! It is just a normal supermarket, you pick up your goods, take them to the till and she / he takes your money. And they are wanting a tip?? LOL

[LovelyIssues]

I don't tip someone for doing their job. They receive a wage

[supermommyof4]

@52Ifbutandmaybe I think its nice to give people a nice little bonus at Xmas such as paper girls/boys especially if they have been doing it all year long and done a good job. Let's face it they dont get minimum wage!

[supermommyof4]

I might occassionally tip a taxi driver or waitress/waiter if my service was exceptional. Otherwise no I don't see why we need to tip people.

[Ifbutandmaybe]

I don't like tipping as much as I used to purely for the fact I used to leave tip on the table and now worry that correct waitress/waiter will get it or if any staff will get it at all incase it gets pinched, most places now their isnt alot of service as you go order and pay at bar they just bring meal to table and if you have carvery you getting your own anyway. I do feel guilty though some offer option to add tip when paying at end which I will if pos, I still tip hairdresser think it's been instilled into me . My Mum Used to tip dustmen, paper boy and milkman at Xmas. Having delivered papers and been waitress seeing from other side it's just nice getting a tip.knowing you have done a good job as it's not easy with some of customers you get , best way to tip is catch waitress/ waiter at end slip money into their hand

[isabellerossignol]

I especially can't believe some don't tip their hairdressers, it's such a personal service

I was completely unaware that tipping hairdressers was a thing until I read about it on mumsnet. So I felt obliged to do it. Have tried it on three different hairdressers and they all refused to accept it, and two of them seemed quite insulted. My current hairdresser laughed and said 'are you mad? If I thought I wasn't getting a fair payment I'd charge you more'.

[Ravenesque]

The only reason I'd have for not tipping would be poor service.

[ymf117]

I always tip. I especially can't believe some don't tip their hairdressers, it's such a personal service, washing, cutting and styling hair. Plus you are in their chair, it's hardly the same as the checkout girl in Tesco who is sitting in a chair whilst you pack your shopping. They are on their feet all day in a busy salon or in the quieter months they're not earning as much. If Tesco was empty the checkout girl would still get paid.

[Countrygirl38]

Threat Matrix - everyone should be getting good service because that is your job. What if other low wager earners applied that logic? Carers, cleaners etc not giving people or their job as much attention because they hadn't been tipped. Personally I go out of my way to give people in my work the best service I can give because it is my job and I want to do my best. Plus the idea that waiting staff may be talking about me behind my back in restaurants doesn't bother me. I can handle that.

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

Why do some posters think that waiting staff should get tips because customers are badly behaved? I never eat in these places, have never seen an argument or shouting at waiting staff. If I did, I would stand up for them because that's inexcusable.

How does having shrapnel thrust at you make it somehow ok or better? That's ridiculous.

Waiting staff should be treated with respect, not necessarily given a tip by the customer. Polite and friendly goes with the job, it's what I'm required to do in my job too so it's not too hard to do.

Some waiting staff are really great but most are mediocre. I don't need gold-plated service, just polite efficient service. Servers get paid what the job is worth and what they agreed to do the work for. It doesn't need more than is in the job description, does it?

For myself, I want to reward the brilliant waiting staff if I'm going to tip, not the entitled 'very average' staff.