Overreacting at DH giving out his number to a woman

[Raven88]

I noticed DH had a text on his phone from an unknown number and I asked who it was from and he told me it was from a customer, he is taxi driver and they got chatting on a run. He didn't text her back and it was a harmless text.

I feel a little betrayed by this and I told him that it's disrespectful to be giving his number out to women that aren't friends. He promised that he was just being friendly and didn't know how to say no to giving his number out. He didn't realise that she probably thought he was interested in her. We talked it out but I feel guilty for being annoyed at this situation.

[WalkingOnAFlashlightBeam]

He thinks you're a naive moron who'll swallow any old shit. He's lying about her husband being there or he'd have told you that when it first came up (as it legitimises it somewhat). Pretty lazy of him to need time to come up with a way of making it sound better and all he could come up with was adding an imaginary third person into the cab!

Do you think most husbands and wives, if they wanted to befriend their cabbie, would have the wife get his number? In front of her husband? No. Most couples wouldn't do that! Because we live in a culture where giving your number out is seen as a way of increasing intimacy with someone (in the, swap numbers cos you get on and then send an in joke way, not the work number for a taxi driver future rides way). Seems odd really that as a married man talking to a married couple he wouldn't swap numbers with the guy, doesn't it? Just the wife, in front of her husband?

Don't let your relief make you allow his lies op, you're better than that. I know you don't want it to be true but I'd bet money he's lying.

Also weirdly enough I've had loads of rides in cabs where I've got on with the driver like a house on fire, had a really good chat about all sorts. Not once have I ever exchanged numbers. decent men will sit there and talk about their wife and kids and make it clear they're a family man, and they won't jeopardise their relationship and disrespect their wives by swapping numbers with a random woman.

Ask him how many male customers he's swapped numbers with.

[Happypuppy]

(I get taxis when I’m on my own generally btw, my husband has never met him but knows about my “nice taxi driver mate”)

[Happypuppy]

I have a taxi driver’s number,we are both married and have also become friends on facebook. There’s really nothing to it as he is 15 or so years older than me. I just find him pleasant to chat to and if I’m wanting a taxi that is a little longer than a standard journey to town etc, I’ll text him first to see if he’s free.

[liminality]

Just saw your update, my previous comment still stands though!

Also, I have had great long and involved conversations with taxi drivers, and some of them have known my age, some details about my relationships, my family, other information. The advice given by wise taxi drivers has sustained me in challenging times in my life. When I find a good one, I keep them!

[liminality]

I have the numbers of at least three taxi drivers in my phone, specifically for arranging rides. Where I live, drivers cannot give out numbers unless asked for them.

I prefer to try and book with them in advance, especially if finishing work past midnight etc when cabs are harder to book. I use them before booking through the phone lines.

I ask good drivers for their number because they drive well, have a good understanding of my area, I feel safe with them, and so on. I've done this for YEARS.
I think YABU.

[Nursejackie1]

I started thinking maybe just maybe he may be naive and innocent....until he later added the pile of shit about the husband being there. He would have said that in the first place if his story was in any way true.

[BlueEyedBengal]

Sounds suspicious his fallow on story

[AskAuntLydia]

t's the norm here to take a taxi drivers number when you get a taxi into town for a night out as it means you can get them to pick you up.

I just checked and I have 12 different taxi driver numbers in my phone.

Bet they're all the driver's work number though, not their personal numbers.

Seriously, people don't give those out. They don't want drunken women calling them at 2AM outside clubs because they had a nice convo one time on the way home.

[KataraJean]

How does he know a taxi customer is 49; also why did she ask for his number when she was with her husband? Totally bizarre. No taxi conversation is so good that you want to continue it with random texts.

[AlonsosLeftPinky]

It's the norm here to take a taxi drivers number when you get a taxi into town for a night out as it means you can get them to pick you up.

I just checked and I have 12 different taxi driver numbers in my phone.

[Namechangedname]

He could have given a wrong number.

[Bluntness100]

Op that doesn't really tie with his first story really.

I'm sorry but I think he's tried to think of something that would allay your concerns. Sadly he just took a bit too long to do it, so it becomes u believable.

There is something you can do with numbers though, you can do some form of magic on google and find out who it belongs to,,

[happypoobum]

What a fucking liar!

[Bumshkawahwah]

I'm not sure I believe that. It's very odd. I think either he is up to no good or has very poor boundaries. Neither of which are good.

[GreatDuckCookery6211]

Hmm so why not tell you that earlier.

[Whattheactualfuckmate]

Yeah still bullshit...

[Raven88]

I pushed him for more information.
She is 49 year old woman and she was with her husband at the time when she asked for his number. They are regular customers and they joke a lot and it was harmless. I want to kill him for giving me a half story

[NoCanoe]

Ouch. I too used to use taxis on very regular basis. Got pally with a few drivers. Never asked for their number. Thats just overstepping boundaries.
If I was asked for mine, I gave my business card.

[Chocolatecoffeeaddict]

Yanbu at all. Not normal to give out your number to randoms or ask for people's numbers unless there's going to be further contact. Whether it's innocent or not, is irrelevant. He has a wife and if she is not comfortable with this, as many others would not be, then he should not be giving his number out or texting back and forth.

[Whattheactualfuckmate]

raven it’s bullshit. He knew what he was doing. Would he have given it out to a gay bloke?

[TheVanguardSix]

You’re more concerned that you questioned/doubted him? Am I understanding this correctly.

I think you’re being a bit naive here OP. There’s a reason she has his number. He’s acting naive. This is different than being naive. He’s not 15 years old. He knew exactly what he was doing. Sorry to sound harsh.
In ALL of years of taking taxis, I’ve never exchanged numbers with a driver.

It’s odd.

[Aeroflotgirl]

I,ve been using taxi for years, as the bus system where I live is dreadful. Sometimes I have had the same driver, and we just have general chit chat, noway, would numbers be exchanged very unprofessional. He is pulling a fast one on you, and thinks your that stupid. Did not know what to say my arse. No I don't give personal details out.

[gillybeanz]

If it's a joke then he knows her well then.
You don't get into a taxi with a man you've never met , start joking with them and ask for their number.

[Doofenschmirtz]

I used to rely on taxis fairly regularly. Often I'd get the same driver and there would be friendly small talk and a fair bit of "Last time I saw you, you were going on holiday/doing some DIY/off to visit family. How did it go?"

Giving out personal phone numbers was never something that came up in conversation. It all sounds very odd.

[halfwitpicker]

He promised that he was just being friendly and didn't know how to say no to giving his number out.

^

The other one has bells on mate.