To be mad that we will be poorer if i move in with dp than if we live seperately?

[malificent7]

Been with dp 2 years...still going very well. We want to move in together. If we do i will loose Universal Credit which means that we will be both worse off as he stretches in income to bridge the gap.
Money is tight as it is but it will put strain on us if we really struggle.

Aibu to think it should be cheaper to live with a dp? I thought this governent were all for promoting family cohesion. Im not buying it

[BackforGood]

OP please come back and explain the maths to us, about how two working adults living as one couple is going to make you worse off than if you were living in two separate places with two sets of living costs, as that doesn't make sense to most of us reading this ??

[PersianCatLady]

VivienneMary
So in your system a single mother who moves in with a millionaire would continue to get benefits. That is not right.

[RunningOutOfCharge]

Is the children's dad paying proper maintenance op?

[Viviennemary]

Of course not. I don't think there are that many millionaires to make a lot of difference though. But I mean that people living as couples shouldn't be worse off than single parents benefits wise. And I think they sometimes are. But as it stands people getting a significant amount of maintenance from an ex (£4k a month in one case) can still get benefits. That's crazy IMHO.

[RunningOutOfCharge]

I don't think they will be 'worse off'

Like everyone, they will need to reassess a bit....

[Bluelonerose]

I think I understand the point your trying to make which is instead of you getting uc to support dc you dp will now be earning that amount so uc is no longer needed.

I imagine dps friends are telling him he's mad to pay for someone else's dc.
Same thing happened when my dh moved in with me I went from getting £120 tc a week while working with 3 dc to getting £8 a week as he had a well paying job. All his friends said he was mad to move in with me but we wanted a relationship more.

It is hard. I'm the one who has always dealt with the finances so to say to dh instead of having x amount to spend on yourself (which was what he was used to) he had to spend it on a ready made family.

Is that what you were getting at op?

[BarbaraofSevillle]

OP please come back and explain the maths to us, about how two working adults living as one couple is going to make you worse off than if you were living in two separate places with two sets of living costs, as that doesn't make sense to most of us reading this

Because like Blue explains, the OP will currently be receiving tax credits that will be lost if her DP moves in. I've known a few people it's happened to, including my sister, who was a single parent of two DCs.

A friend moved in with her high earning DP and lost everything, even CB as his income meant that the new household was entitled to nothing at all and he was expected to support his DP and her 2 DCs.

If the DP is currently living very cheaply, the loss of tax credits could be more than the amount that he saves on living costs.

[YellowMakesMeSmile]

OP unlikely to be back, it's the same poster who blew a large inheritance, trained as a teacher but won't teach and complained that her dad wouldn't buy her a house. Now they are moaning that benefits will stop, says it all really.

[SilverySurfer]

I agree, YellowMakesMeSmile it follows on from the massive sense of entitlement and she obviously doesn't give a shit that other people are working hard to pay taxes which end up paying for her living expenses.

[RunningOutOfCharge]

Well of course benefits should stop

2 working adults.... madness to want tax credits on top as well. So entitled

[DarlesChickens61]

What? Wait! .... if I leave my DH will I be better off a single person and he will be better off as a single person?

Why didn’t we think of that before? Ummm... maybe because we are in a committed married relationship. What’s his is mine and what’s mine is his... we have always paid our own way and apart from child benefit , that everyone gets, we have never relied on benefits. We don’t have to thank the taxpayer for supporting us. That’s good enough reason for me.

I really don’t get people who prefer to live apart from their partners just to scam the British taxpayer. Has loyalty within a relationship really become this shallow?

[JonSnowsWife]

even CB as his income meant that the new household was entitled to nothing at all and he was expected to support his DP and her 2 DCs.

If his income was such that your sister lost out on CB, his income was clearly substantial. Of course he should be expected to support his DP, that's what usually happens when you commit to living together.

[BackforGood]

A friend moved in with her high earning DP and lost everything, even CB as his income meant that the new household was entitled to nothing at all and he was expected to support his DP and her 2 DCs

er.... well yes..... a couple whose income is very high aren't entitled to state support.... surely that is obvious