VEGETARIANS

[DaisyRaine90]

I understand people who REALLY don't eat meat, but people who sometimes do but then make you cater for them?

Should I pander to it or just say "I saw you eat a bacon sandwich last week so if you don't want to eat meat bring your own main"

[PovertyPain]

But they're not vegetarian and they're bullshitting, Star which is why genuine vegetarians/vegans get served shite they don't/can't eat when they're dining out" you then get the host, waiter, chef, etc doing the "but my friend's a vegi and they eat ...... The real vegi has to explain the whole fucking meaning AGAIN, as you can even see on this discussion! Why can't they say something as simple as, ,I would like/prefer a vegetarian option, this time" instead of lying? They're Tossertarians.

[pantrylightout]

Poverty pain, yes you are right. I would love to be full vegan but sometimes its hard when you need coffee and there is only cows milk available. unsweetened soya from aldi is the best one out there. If only I could give up coffee......Also have only just realised that supermarket bread sometimes has a protein from chicken feathers in it, its a mine field out there. We can only do our best.

[SimultaneousEquation]

Thank you for explaining my dietary choices to me camellia. I’m sure it’ll be much easier for everyone if I explain I’m not a vegetarian, just that I don’t ever eat meat out of choice unless I feel it would cause embarrassment to a host.

[pantrylightout]

Tossertarians hee hee, I will use that one myself if you dont mind.

[Tinkerbec]

It’s sad to see life as all so binary.

No 50 shades here.

[PurpleDaisies]

simultaneous I don’t understand your position at all. Most meals don’t consist entirely of meat. Just don’t eat the meat bit.

[SimultaneousEquation]

Purple - that’s exactly what I do, and with most people I would not bat an eyelid at apologising for being rubbish about explaining I’m a vegetarian. There have been a few times in my two decades of vegetarianism where I have been served a meal by someone, they haven’t realised and I’ve sensed they would be mortified if I mentioned it, and feel put on the spot to provide something else. It really doesn’t happen often: once with an elderly relative, once when I was overseas and “vegetarian” was interpreted quite loosely my my lovely and well-meaning hosts. It’s been at these times when I have put “not hurting other people” over not consuming the carcass of an animal which will otherwise go in the bin. I don’t like the taste, I don’t like the thought of meat being an animal carcass, but my vegetarianism isn’t a religious requirement and I don’t have an allergy: so for me, in that situation, eating meat is the least worst option.

I would still describe myself as vegetarian, and I don’t want my dietary preferences to cause hurt to humans or other animals.

[NellWilsonsWhiteHair]

I think it's bizarre to insist that someone like simultaneous isn't a 'real vegetarian' - and I'm speaking as someone who is an actual lifelong Real Vegetarian and therefore apparently ought to be bearing a grudge over all those who inconsiderately muddy the waters.

MN is often fucking weird about vegetarianism though.

I tend to follow up vegetarian with "no meat, no fish" if it looks at all likely that the host/ waiter/ other person with whom I am communicating my dietary requirements might be uncertain. My experience is that a large number, perhaps even a majority, of people expect that I may eat fish - I don't think 'pescatarian' has entirely caught on as a label. This doesn't annoy me, it just prompts me to make it really explicit what I don't eat. There are too many other things to be pissed off about, and I don't particularly enjoy feeling pissed off!

[ButchyRestingFace]

Should I pander to it or just say "I saw you eat a bacon sandwich last week so if you don't want to eat meat bring your own main"

Maybe, like many struggling to quit smoking, it’s a case of the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak?

Ie, the person has dramatically or (almost entirely) reduced their meat intake but occassionally falls off the wagon?

[blanklook]

if you go to someone else's house for a meal they cooked, you just suck it up

I prefer guests to use the cutlery and other utensils provided

Depends on the menu OP as to how easy or how much of a hindrance a hindrance providing a vegie meal will be for you on the day.

I hadn't heard the chicken feathers in supermarket bread before, what do they call it on the label? Not that I buy supermarket bread but some of the family like it as an occasional divergence from the relentlessly healthy and good for you things I make them eat.

[tangerino]

Maybe they’re trying to stop eating meat and struggling?

Either way, I’d just give them something vegetarian. I wouldn’t dream of quizzing them on what they’d eaten on other occasions- how rude.

[caoraich]

hmm I'm not sure. I've been a vegetarian for so long that I've forgotten what meat tastes like (other than it always gave me the boak!) but I have a friend who is gradually moving to being vegetarian. She's starting by cutting down meat to 2 days a week, then she'll do the same with fish then stop. She reckons this will help her stick with it, rather than changing her cooking habits all at once and struggling. Is this person doing similar? I do get why people randomly chopping and changing is annoying though.

I recently had friends round for dinner. The morning beforehand my friend "remembered to mention" that she was now vegan and on a gluten-free diet. That was a fun dash round the supermarket.

[DaisyRaine90]

I am now eating the veggie leftovers. DD thought it was rubbish, but I loved it.

Maybe I’ll become an annoying half veggie too 😂

[CamelliaSinensis35]

Thank you for explaining my dietary choices to me camellia. I’m sure it’ll be much easier for everyone if I explain I’m not a vegetarian, just that I don’t ever eat meat out of choice unless I feel it would cause embarrassment to a host.

Happy to help. And it'd probably be much easier for everyone if you explained clearly that you're a vegetarian and that this means you don't eat meat or fish. Again, in case unclear; vegetarian means no meat at all, not no meat unless you're worried about people's reactions. Must be grim having to choke the stuff down if you don't want to.

[SimultaneousEquation]

We’ll have to agree that we haven’t walked in each other’s shoes Camellia. In some cultures, the word meat refers to red meat, and people consider poultry (and even bacon) not to be “meat”. In a restaurant in such a country, I wouldn’t hesitate to ask for a different option. But hosted at someone’s house, when I know they have gone to some lengths to cater for me and I know that money is scarce: of course I’ll eat what I’m given. This is my choice, and consistent with my principles.

[sadeyedladyofthelowlands63]

People who eat meat are not vegetarians so you need to point this out to them. Not lump actual vegetarians in with these twats.

This! As recently as last year I was in a restaurant with friends where one of the "vegetarian options" was trout! When I (very politely) pointed out to the waitress that trout was not vegetarian, she said "but some vegetarians eat fish". No. Some idiots who CALL themselves vegetarians eat fish (I didn't say this obviously). I don't care what anyone eats, but don't call yourself vegetarian when you're not.

I have been vegetarian for thirty years. I do not expect other people to cater for me - if someone asks me to dinner I will always offer to bring a vegetarian main. 95% of the time they refuse and either offer a vegetarian alternative for me or make the whole meal vegetarian. For which I am very grateful.

[TheWhyteRoseShallRiseAgain]

Love tossertarian! My dd1 (7) who eats meat and fish calls faffers pestatarians after seeing me (who is veggie because I physically can't eat meat, fish or poultry not for ethical or religious reasons) being offered fish as the veggie option many times.

[SierraFerrara]

I eat meat but am very fussy about it (eg type and source etc) and generally prefer veggie meals but they often have cheese which I can't eat much of so sometimes it's down to how the cheese will make me feel.

If someone cooks for me I'll eat what they make enthusiastically. If they ask before hand and I know they won't mind I'll ask for veggie.

When we go out for a meal I will as much as possible try to insist on somewhere which has decent veggie options which really shouldn't be as hard as it is.

I do sometimes go fully veggie as well but I find it really hard to maintain.

I can see why people think I'm being fussy and picky.

[CamelliaSinensis35]

Good to have principles Simultaneous and of course you are free to eat whatever you like for whatever reason works for you. But we will have to agree to disagree on the definition of vegetarian, my definition of eating no meat is clearly different to yours; eating a little bit of meat in certain situations

[PumpkinSquash]

Why can't they say something as simple as, ,I would like/prefer a vegetarian option, this time" instead of lying? They're Tossertarians.



totally stealing tossertarians

[RafikiIsTheBest]

I don't class myself as a vegetarian anymore because I now give in when offered sweets and occasionally eat fish. But I always ask for a vegetarian/pescetarian meal... I don't see the issue. I can eat a vegetarian main course and a bag of Haribo if I choose to!

Sometimes I totally fall off the wagon and have chicken! The horror! But I wouldn't like it if someone invited me over for a meal, asked what I did or didn't want and then had a winge when I said I'd prefer something without any sort of meat just because I'd happened to have a KFC last Friday.

[RafikiIsTheBest]

As for risotto, if someone made me a risotto that turned out well I'd be extremely pleased and grateful. One of my favourite meals.

[NurseButtercup]

I go meat free approx 1-2 weeks every month and I don't eat meat replacements such as quorn either. If I was invited to dinner I would just say I'll eat the carbs being served and ask for extra veggies or a simple salad to be prepared. My friends are quite happy with this and understand that I occasionally also eat meat.

[southboundagain]

I remember at university when we cooked a full Christmas dinner for 12 people with a single oven. One of the guys in the kitchen insisted that as he was a vegetarian, we needed to somehow find room for another tray of roast potatoes because the main lot were being cooked in goose fat. Fine, no problem. He then ate the pigs in blankets...

[vj32]

SimultaneousEquation I have been vegetarian for over 20 years (my choice when I was 14) and I get what you mean. Im pretty strict but I have had things that I either suspect are not veggie or are not cooked separately a few times, probably once a year. Most recently last week when my lovely MIL was cooking Sunday lunch and put sausages in the same tray as the potatoes. Actually contamination of my potatoes with sausage fat clearly didn't do me any harm, may not have happened anyway and certainly wasn't enough of a reason to seriously upset someone who had already gone out of her way to cater for me. I also sometimes buy shoes that aren't certainly animal free (glues and all that stuff) although not leather. Its all about what an individual is happy with an their own ethics.