To not let potential new neighbour view my house?

[Wisterical]

I live in a block of four housing association flats. Yesterday three people I didn't know were in the shared back garden, chatting to each other. After about 10 minutes I went out and said hi, err who are you? One of them (Doreen) said she had just been offered the tenancy of the flat next door and the other two where her friends who live locally. Doreen said she didn't know when she'd be moving in as current tenant hasn't moved out yet. So we had a short, friendly chat and eventually they left.

Today Doreen's friend knocked on my door and asked if Doreen could come and have a look around my flat, to get an idea of the layout and size (it will be mirror image of her flat).

I said perhaps they could talk to the HA about a viewing or she could ask current tenant to let her look around - but they don't want to do that because they don't know her. They don't know me either!

AIBU to say not let her look around my flat? I get on well with all my neighbours but really value my privacy and only invite friends inside. Am I being too uptight and unhelpful? I've thought about drawing her a nice diagram, with room measurements, but suspect that's a bit ridiculous of me.

[BulletFox]

YANBU, I'm touchy about boundaries and my space as well.

She can ask but she's not entitled to see it. Find it a bit weird really that she appears not to have asked the H.A.

[LineysRun]

I wouldn't let strangers into my house to 'look around'. I've got valuable work stuff here, tech stuff, and jewellery. Fuck that shit.

[ferrier]

Doreen was probably uncomfortable with asking too which is why her 'helpful' friend did it.

[Wisterical]

I'm pretty sure HA's don't arrange a viewing until the property is empty and my neighbour is still living there.

[Itsanicehotel]

I'd be a bit worried they were scouting the place out for someone to see if you had anything worth stealing. I live on a HA estate and there is some well dodgy stuff going on round here.

[BewareOfDragons]

YANBU.

[Ellendegeneres]

Here's the thing- they don't need to know the layout. They know where it is, and that it has the rooms that will be enough for their occupancy, that's more than enough.
I think it's incredibly creepy that the friend of the prospective tenant knocks asking to allow her mate a nosey round yours. I'd say no without even considering why they'd want to, it's my home and my privacy and they're total sodding strangers.
Like you, I have friends over, but even my neighbours who I've lived next door to for years have never been past the doorstep. No need, they're nice enough neighbours but they're not my friends 🤷‍♀️

[Hidingtonothing]

I would just say 'sorry but I'm quite a private person so don't feel comfortable with that, am sure you understand', smile politely and close the door. It might mark you out as 'prickly' or standoffish with your new neighbour but I sense that's not a bad thing, she sounds like she has potential to be overbearing and intrusive so best to mark your boundaries early.

[Eliza9917]

cingolimama
Yes sorry, I think you are being too uptight and unhelpful. This person is going to be your neighbour! Someone who might be doing you favours one day. Someone you want to be on good terms with.

It's ten minutes with (if you're feeling generous) a cup of tea thrown in. Of course you don't have to invite them in - it's your right. But I think it's very odd.

They could also be potential burglars or kidnappers or axe murderers. Would you let any old Tom, Dick or Harry that knocked on your door come in and look around???? I certainly wouldn't. How very odd.

Why did Doreen send her friend to ask if she could look round? How very odd.

Why didn't they ask to look around the flat that would potentially be hers? How very odd.

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

I don't think it's odd at all, I've done it and had it done to me. You don't have to do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable though.

[Bluntness100]

I’d have let them in to be fair, although I’d have felt a tad weird about it. I get why you wouldn’t. They obviously think you’re nice and friendly so thought it would be ok. She’s obviously keen to understand what her new home feels like. Probably didn’t want to ask herself as knew it was necky.

[Ohyesiam]

When we bought our house, we had to fully renovate it.
It was in a terrace of about 20, and I think pretty much every one on the row asked is in to show how the different configurations could work in a renovation. We felt really welcome, it was a lovely start to our lived together, and it has been a lovely relaxed friendly place to live for the past 15 or so years.
So to me, you could be more relaxed , unless you get a gut feeling that they are dodgy, and wouldn't trust them in your house.

[Lovemusic33]

HA here doesn't let places out until they are empty (as work might need doing), they are then put on the website for people to bid. If you get offered the flat/house you then go and view before deciding if you want it or not.

I think they have probably heard it's becoming empty and are waiting to bid on it, I doubt very much they have been given the leese before the other people have moved out and without seeing inside.

[StormTreader]

"Then in just a five minute chat the new tenant told me loads of personal stuff, over-sharing health problems etc and when her friend knocked today she told me how difficult tenants life had been recently"

Nope, get those boundary walls up now and keep them there, otherwise you'll never have a quiet moment again with them knocking for food, drinks, chats etc. Every time a new person has opened with all their woes the first time I met them, they tried to leverage that quickly into constant "favours".

[Sheila56]

I'd say no too..I live in a block of 4 flats, and I have had some awful upstairs neighbours..You don't know these people, so saying no is fine..

[coddiwomple]

YANBU

this is just weird, I would not let some random in my home! They should deal with the current tenant of their flat, no-one else

[Wisterical]

hidingtonothing thanks, that's a good way of putting it, I think I'll try saying that if they come round again (got a strong feeling they will )

[Theresnonamesleft]

Love - I don’t understand that either, how Doreen has been given a tenancy for an already occupied property. It’s the same here as well. Property become vacant - ha go in clear out any leftover furniture etc and list it. People bid and the highest are then given opportunity to view, them those that don’t want it nothing more, those that do I think it goes to the one with highest band.

So op could potentially have 50 people knocking on her door to have a look around

[Nousernameforme]

When we were bidding on houses a few years back right there on the page is a statement where it tells you not to go and bother the residents I guess this means neighbours as well you could report it to the HA

[Wisterical]

My HA are desperate not to have void weeks, because of losing rental income, so they advertise properties as soon as tenant gives notice and the bid 'winner' is offered the property, sometimes before the property is empty. Immediately the property is empty the HA arranges a viewing and tenancy starts as soon as any necessary work is done. So it is possible 'Doreen' has been offered the flat though she's definitely not signed a tenancy agreement yet.

I'm not suspicious of their motives, this is a pretty safe village, I just don't want my privacy invaded and yes, stormtreader, that's also my worry!

[Hidingtonothing]

Thinking about it PP's are right, the HA won't have offered the property to anyone until the current tenants have gone so Doreen is definitely trying to pull a fast one. Most likely she is interested in the flat and wants a nosy round yours before she bids. Even more reason to say no OP and stick to your guns if they keep pushing.

[Hidingtonothing]

Ah, cross post, makes sense. Doreen is still a CF though

[AcrossthePond55]

I can't imagine knocking on a prospective neighbour's house and asking for a 'look-see'.

Surely the HA has blueprints or pictures of a similar flat for prospective tenants to view?

[ReanimatedSGB]

I might even be inclined to ring the HA and tell them this. Just in case these people are not prospective new tenants at all (the fact that they were in the private garden is dodgy).

[Nocabbageinmyeye]

Doreens friend called because they know they are being cheeky fuckers so Doreen didn't want to do it herself, getting her friend to do it means Doreen can deny all knowledge and the friend won't have to live beside you so can brazen it out. Tell Doreen to do one