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To think 33 minutes (driving) is too far for DS's extra curricular activity?

130 replies

Allieson · 29/06/2017 00:26

DS really wants to start ice skating. The closest to us is 33 minutes away (by car) he doesn't do anything else so I'm undecided. He's 10 so old enough for it to not be a spur of the moment thing (he has been asking for a couple of years Blush).

It's only for an hour lesson! AIBU to think the travelling to and back shouldn't be longer than the actual thing itself!? So WIBU to say no?

I admit that I could take him (I work part time but off on that day).

OP posts:

SteppingOnToes · 29/06/2017 00:30

DSC have this every single day on DP's days! Two children in two different activities so imagine the half hour drive twice... organised by their mother and if he says no he's the bad one


DancingLedge · 29/06/2017 00:31

He really wants to do it.
He's been asking for a couple of years.
He doesn't have other activities.

But, your "car rules" are more important?????


UrsulaPandress · 29/06/2017 00:31

Of course you should take him.


Bizzysocks · 29/06/2017 00:31

Do you have other DC you would have to take with you or get back for?

Is it likely he would be able to skate for an hour after the lesson making it a 2 hour activity? you could skate too for that hour? or take a book.


KeepServingTheDrinks · 29/06/2017 00:32

We used to drive DD 45 minutes for a 20 minute horse riding lesson and back again. AND it wasn't especially cheap.

I'd say if you can afford it and your child wants it, then do it.

But I come from a place which prioritises the child. I grew up in an environment which was predominantly around the relationship between my parents. You have to choose where you are. But if cost is an issue (it wasn't for us at this point, but would be now) then this has to factor in.

Up to you.

FWIW, I absolutely idolise the parents who prioritise their kids and their wants and desires. I try and be like them, as I think they are ace.


Giraffey1 · 29/06/2017 00:33

33 mins? Sorry, but that's nothing!


PippaFawcett · 29/06/2017 00:33

Take him! I see no reason at all from your OP why you wouldn't! I think that is pretty standard distance for a hobby. We use our travel time to catch up on our days etc, it is actually quite nice.


MrsOverTheRoad · 29/06/2017 00:33

YABU. I used to get two buses to take DD to ballroom on a Saturday. It took an hour and we had to leave at 7.30am. It was worth it!


BackforGood · 29/06/2017 00:34

As you can do it, and it's the only thing he wants to do, then I don't think it's too far at all.
Lots of things take that long to get to (in traffic) even in a City where there are lots of options,. I should imagine if you live rurally then that is a standard journey for most things.

It's fine - get yourself a good book, or charge your phone up and turn your data on, and you get a peaceful hour to yourself whilst you wait. Rather nice to have that time to yourself, for most parents Smile


toffeeboffin · 29/06/2017 00:34

Oh god, I'd say don't bother, it's too far.


Crumbs1 · 29/06/2017 00:41

We live about 35 minutes drive from nearest town, so all activities took longer to drive to than that. Youngest had dance x4 a week an hours drive until she went boarding. Rugby was frequently all over the south of England. Fencing was all over UK and abroad.


NorthumbrianGirl · 29/06/2017 00:50

I don't think that's particularly far, I think you should take him!


SouthWindsWesterly · 29/06/2017 00:51

I've driven further for less time in lessons. He's been asking for years and seems to really want to do it. I'd say give him a chance


Seeingadistance · 29/06/2017 00:56

You should take him!


BeepBeepMOVE · 29/06/2017 00:57

YABU! That's not far at all. And if you only work part time then it's not exactly taking up your only time off. Be a bit kinder!


Perihelion · 29/06/2017 01:02

Check whether the rink has a Learn to Skate session, where there are group lessons and then more time on the ice after. I do this with DD. Here it costs a fiver each for almost 2 hours on the ice. And as it's just turn up with no pre booking/paying there's less pressure to commit every week to it........however we've been skating since the start of the year and hardly missed a week as we're both so into it arse and legs haven't been this toned for at least a decade. Grin
If he ( and you ) like it, I recommend getting your own skates too.
I'm lucky it's only a 25 minute drive without traffic, but have met people there who drive for an hour to get their skating fix.


Theycalledmethewildrose · 29/06/2017 01:11

Around here people spend that long getting to school every day.

Of course you should take him and encourage his interests if it doesn't put unnecessary financial pressure on your family.


GardenGeek · 29/06/2017 01:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

user1497480444 · 29/06/2017 01:17

we don't have a car, so DCs extra curricular activities were normally accessed by bus. 33 mins is nothing. plus you journey was normally a positive time together


Fluffypinkpyjamas · 29/06/2017 01:18

YABU. 33 minutes?! Of course you should, have you really left it 2 years? Shock


SomeOtherFuckers · 29/06/2017 01:20

Not really ... took me 90 minutes to get to bloody school, 50 mins to the nearest shopping centre, 25 to gymnastics ...


Unadon · 29/06/2017 01:25

YABU. When I was in Uni my dad drove 90 minutes once a week to have dinner with me straight after my Wednesday classes. Told him he didn't have to go through all that trouble but he did it anyway because for us it was tradition to eat at this particular place.

Years have passed and I still appreciate him for that.


Ginger782 · 29/06/2017 01:44

YABU and silly.


WellThatSucks · 29/06/2017 01:51

I took DS2 on the bus to his activity, 45 mins each way plus time added on waiting for late/skipped buses. Honestly OP, an hour or so round trip for something he really wants to do isn't much. If he's waited 2 years already and still keen it's not like it's a passing fad. Maybe there's someone else who wants to do it near you so you might be able to arrange doing it turns?


Atenco · 29/06/2017 01:58

Most people don't live right beside an ice-rink, do they? I don't think my dd ever had an activity that was just around the corner, mind you I don't have a car.

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