To think 33 minutes (driving) is too far for DS's extra curricular activity?

[Allieson]

DS really wants to start ice skating. The closest to us is 33 minutes away (by car) he doesn't do anything else so I'm undecided. He's 10 so old enough for it to not be a spur of the moment thing (he has been asking for a couple of years ).

It's only for an hour lesson! AIBU to think the travelling to and back shouldn't be longer than the actual thing itself!? So WIBU to say no?

I admit that I could take him (I work part time but off on that day).

[notfromstepford]

Agree with GirlIn - it just sounds like you can't be arsed tbh , half an hour is nothing. YABVU.

[GirlInTheDirtyShirt]

Unless there's more info that you're going to dripfeed later, you sound very selfish. The poor kid's been asking to do an activity for years, that's only a half hour drive away, and you won't take him? You also say he doesn't do any other activities I suppose everything's "too far"

[Mia1415]

I spend my whole Saturday driving DS (4) to activities that are 40 minutes and then 30 minutes away from home. 33 mins is nothing! My daily commute is twice that.

He's been asking for a few years so obviously really wants to do it.

Of course you should take him!

[babybythesea]

DD1 dances twice a week. It takes 30 minutes each way. She has gained things from it I never anticipated. A great group of friends, and I have made some great friends from the other parents. She is academic and never struggles at school. Dancing, slightly different story. She's had to learn to be persistent and practice when she can't do something, to handle the idea of 'can't do it immediately'. She's done exams and shows, which have boosted her confidence, and she's learning to cope in slightly stressful situations. I'm really pleased she's learning some of this stuff in a club like dancing, where ultimately it doesn't matter, rather than running into difficulties at school further down the line and not knowing how to handle it (she doesn't like not being right, or not able to do something immediately!). Hopefully she will also have a hobby which keeps her fit, active, and occupied, with a good group of mates, as she grows into a teenager.
I'd take him. It's not all about the skating.

[WellThisIsShit]

I wonder if the op expected such a chorus of 'Obviously, yabu'?

[PossumInAPearTree]

He's been asking for years so is obviously keen?

Dd has skating lessons and loves it. We drive just over an hour each way every week to get to lessons and for ages it meant leaving home at 07:30 on a Sunday as lessons started so early.

But it's made such a massive difference to her. It's the only activity she's ever wanted to do. It's good exercise and it's improved her mental health so much. She looks forward to that one hour all week.

[Mummyoflittledragon]

is op coming back?

[KimmySchmidt1]

yes you are BU. 33 mins is not very much. if you lived in london you'd be hard pressed to get to anything in that time. i lived outside when growing up and my mum took me 1 hour to get to a county gymnastics class.

are you prepared to give up a bit of time so your child can accomplish something or not?

[sparklefarts]

Yabu.
Massively.

Half hour isn't very far is it really? I'm guessing you live in a big city

[endofthelinefinally]

I think you should take him. A physical hobby is so important. It teaches kids so much and provides another friendship group outside school. Through the teenage years it keeps them off the streets and keeps them fit.
30 minutes drive is negligble.

[JustMumNowNotMe]

Rider what, for anything?!

I do an hour each way for work, would still take the kids to clubs half an hour away.

[JustMumNowNotMe]

Rider what, for anything?!

I do an hour each way for work, would still take the kids to clubs half an hour away.

[HipsterHunter]

@Riderontheswarm

I would rarely travel for 33 mins

A commute to work of under 30 mins is really unusual....

[HipsterHunter]

@Chloe84

Maybe OP can't afford the lessons/petrol
OP says its the ime she isn;t happy about, not money.

Maybe she is a nervous driver
If thjats the case, one shuld get over it and seek help. But she doesn;t say that, she states its the sheer time.

Maybe she has a shit load of other commitments
Again, says she could get him there.

Maybe there is a shit load of traffic where she lives
33 mins traveling 3 miles in traffic and 33 mins travelling 30 miles down the M way are both 33 mins. She gave the journey in mins. I assume she knows about the traffic.

[ZanyMobster]

I must say I am really surprised you even have to ask, the fact you don't even work on that day too. My too do lots of activities and we still travel that sort of distance regularly, often much longer (admittedly when the travelling is longer then the activity tends to be longer too).

I did ice skating lessons and had to travel that distance, it never seemed that long to be honest.

If you can't afford the travel or there are other reasons then of course YANBU.

[BadToTheBone]

My parents did it daily and I do it for my dc several times a week. The journey when it's just the two of you, forced to talk is simply bliss when they're teenagers.

[Riderontheswarm]

33 mins each way is a lot of travelling. I know many PPS are saying it is no distance but I think it is far. I would rarely travel for 33 mins. If he did lots of other activities I would have to think about it. As he does no activities I would definitely take him if I could afford the class, the equipment and the journey. He might really love it. If he doesn't particularly enjoy it you can always stop taking him and he will know you gave him the opportunity. And you will know you gave him the opportunity.

[Chloe84]

titchy

What's 'pathetic and shit' is you judging someone without knowing the full facts.

Maybe OP can't afford the lessons/petrol

Maybe she is a nervous driver

Maybe she has a shit load of other commitments

Maybe there is a shit load of traffic where she lives

[flibberdee]

Take him. Please

[SokokeCat]

Wait until they get selected for certain squads and are training at 5:30am and then back again for an evening session.
I do between 300-400 miles a week for activities depending on competition locations.
I read a lot of books.

[titchy]

Basically you can't be arsed can you? Which imo is pathetic and shit. Buy him an Xbox instead eh.

[dailymailarecunts]

Off the back of this thread, I've just researched holiday clubs at the local ice rink and signed ds up. It's 55 mins away - just for context!

[Perihelion]

Mulled wine 45 isn't too late to learn to skate.... that's how old I am. Only skated a few times as a kid, then started lessons this year with DD. At the Learn to Skate lessons, there's lots of adults and parents learning along side the kids.

[HipsterHunter]

Yes you should do it!

The time in the car together can actually be quite nice.

[CookingDinner]

I think you should do the drive. When I was younger I was into dancing. When the local dance class closed down, the nearest one was about 30 mins away and my Mum refused to take me because it was too much hassle. I've never forgotten it and still feel a bit bitter about it!

I think you've got to encourage any interest your children show for extra-curricular activities. They bring so many benefits - particularly when they are in their teen years. It's a cliché but it really can 'keep them off the streets' and keep them focused on something productive. It can provide masses of self-esteem. So many kids aren't interested in ANYTHING - which can be very worrying for some parents.

A 30 mins drive isn't far. Our nearest town, with lots of activity going on is about that far away, and I know I will be driving my kids there lots so they can get involved with things. They might not even take to it and give up after a while, but at least you provided that opportunity.