What would you do: babies or travel

[bee123p]

You are late twenties.

High powered job, good boss, lots of potential to go part time. Not a fulfilling role, been watching jobs for nearly two years but nothing right has come up. Losing sense of self and impacting on mental health.

Worked since 18, watched friends go travelling or have babies. Wanted to travel when younger but husband didn't want to. More tied down with mortgage and jobs now.

Stable marriage, very low mortgage. Option to remortgage minimal amount to free up funds for a better life.

Always wanted to be a mother, but keep delaying as it gets nearer the time agreed. Husband desperate for children. Your parent is elderly with some health conditions and you want them to be around for your children as they grow up. Have a health condition yourself that may impact on fertility.

Feeling lost. Current situation absolutely not working, It's like running on a treadmill and could fall off at any moment. What would you do?

[OverOn]

I'd travel too, having babies a year or two later when you're in your 20s anyway is really not going to make much difference to your energy levels etc.

Out if interest - is your DH younger/same age/older? If he's older, did he do any travelling, more holidays before you got together? Has he got it out of his system whilst you haven't (or did he just want to crack on with work)

[Glastokitty]

Travel first, its an absolute no brainer. Another six months or year won't make much difference when having babies. As an old gimmer of 47 I can confirm that SwimmingMom has it absolutely spot on.

[bee123p]

Thank you all, you've been so kind! Most people I know are too close to the situation, so it's been very difficult to discuss with anyone. I need to work out the logistics with jobs and remortgaging, but I'm beginning to think I should go for it. We could pursue both in the next year if I stop drifting by!

Alpaca - this is DH's preferred option. Thank you for getting in touch - glad to hear it was fulfilling. This could well be an option we go for.

Swimming - thank you! This is what I'm concerned about at the moment. I already have that feeling of not knowing where the time has gone?!

OverOn - DH is a little bit older, think he's working on a self-set timescale too. We met very young, so have grown up together. He regrets not going when I originally mentioned it, but would only go now for my sake. He is absolutely prepared to do it though, recognises that I've given up a lot. We missed out on living somewhere I really wanted to live while the property markets changed too, and he knows that I've sacrificed my wants for his. He's a good egg and I adore him, just opinionated (as we all are, I suppose).

[londonrach]

Did as badger..travelled first. Learnt so much about the world and myself and bonded as a couple. Dd in my 40s. As we travelled and coped with things going wrong its really helped with dd. Glad i did it that way around but each to their own.

[RebelandaStunner]

We chose to travel first. Backpacked and worked abroad, then got a house and went on lots of luxury holidays in tropical places, sightseeing, clubbing and big cities.
Then DC.
Then abroad as a family 2-3 times a year once youngest was 3-4.

[puglife15]

My advice is stop bloody worrying and just go for it!

Ask about a sabbatical next week. The worst they can say is no. And it's far easier to retrain when you're young and childfree too.

Having been traveling and had kids I would 100% travel first. Judging by your posts you are very good at finding barriers and reasons not to do what you want to do, and kids are the ultimate reason - even going on holiday for a week can feel like a huge effort with two little ones.

Stop procrastinating!

[icy121]

Took me 3 years to get pregnant, needed ivf. 29 now. Glad I started trying at 26, as starting at 30 would've meant less likelihood of it working as eggs age etc.

[EveEve13]

Take some risks! Think it when you are 69-79-89? What do you want to have done?

Take leave and travel for 6 months then try for baby - best of both worlds and get your family to met you in places for mini breaks. Be bold!

[thesparkthatbled]

Travel 100%.
One of the happiest moments of my life is messing about in the sea at the start of my travels (aged 28) when it occurred to me that I was completely free of responsibility for the next 8 months, that I could do what I wanted whenever. Bliss.
You wouldn't get that traveling with children, as you always have to be 'on' with kids in tow, putting their needs before your own.
If you're itching for the carefree spontaneous traveler experience (which it sounds like you are) then I'd say definitely go for it and get it out of your system, come home, settle down and make those lovely babies . You have plenty of time.