Where I work, parents earn more than childless people... and it annoys me

[MustBookADentistAppointment]

So, where I work, parents receive an allowance because they have children. I don't have any children, but I would really like them. The argument is that people with children need the money because it's expensive having kids. Which I don't disagree with for a minute, but it pisses me off, nonetheless.

I'm single. Which means I have to pay all my rent/mortgage etc on my own, which is expensive. More expensive than if I lived with a partner. But I don't qualify for extra salary. Clearly, it's my choice to live alone, and I'm not blaming being single on my colleagues but hopefully you see what I mean. I'd also like a dog, but wouldn't get extra money to pay for dog daycare/walkers etc (I am NOT comparing having children to having a dog, just explaining that my lifestyle choices don't qualify for extra payments, like they would if I had children).

I can totally see the merit in an allowance for children, but am I being unreasonable to be pissed off about it? I'm slightly jealous of them, and am also paying through the nose for private therapy to try and manage/get over being alone and feeling sad about it - I just feel that their lifestyle is being subsidised, whereas mine isn't, even though it's kinda expensive too.

[flippinada]

That's all in the assumption you're in the UK of course, which I know you may not be.

[happypoobum]

They also paid cyclists an allowance - £150 per year towards bike and equipment.

I can't ride a bike but I never complained

[MustBookADentistAppointment]

Also, I'm not about to start some campaign which would result in people losing money just because they have kids. That would be a) mean and b) shooting myself in the foot given I do hope to have children at some point.

[LouiseBrooks]

YANBU, it's outrageous if they truly get a higher salary purely because they have children.

[Sophieelmer]

So few employers do enough to encourage women back to work after having children. Yes it is a choice to have children but childcare costs in this country are so excessive it prohibits many from taking an active part in the workforce, predominantly women. Any employer that makes an effort to counteract that injustice is doing a great thing in my book and people get upset that it doesn't benefit them at this current moment, miss the whole point. It is about doing their small part to create a more equal workplace, something that will benefit all women.

[NetflixandBill]

somethingborrowed those examples don't relate to the situation. OP could choose to take advantage of the free coffee or gym if she wishes. Both she and her employees cannot opt to have the coffee/gym money in their pay packet to spend as they see fit.

[PurpleDaisies]

Also, I'm not about to start some campaign which would result in people losing money just because they have kids. That would be a) mean and b) shooting myself in the foot given I do hope to have children at some point.

Why did you bother with the thread then?

Either it's unfair so you should challenge it or it isn't.

It's pretty pathetic to leave it because it might benefit you in the future.

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

They also paid cyclists an allowance - £150 per year towards bike and equipment.

£150 a year which is actually for a set number of years up to a certain amount, if I remember correctly, is a bit different to getting 3k a year.

[ImFuckingSpartacus]

They also get extra leave for each child they have, a number of weeks they can take over the course of the childs life, I think

Thats called parental leave and is the law, all parents get it. It is not a perk of your job.
Given that you have confused this with a work perk, I reckon you've done the same with the money and you're thinking of child benefit?

[NSEA]

Perhaps you could consider faking a pregnancy. Then not only a payrise but also a years maternity leave/ holiday?

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

Any employer that makes an effort to counteract that injustice is doing a great thing in my book and people get upset that it doesn't benefit them at this current moment, miss the whole point.

No not missing the point at all. Care costs for the disabled are high also for example, why aren't employers also paying extra for those that have dependents also.

[TonaldDrump]

Yes but its the principle, no? If a company can pay cyclists extra then they can pay parents too! Suddenly it's all about the amount?

[TonaldDrump]

Many jobs offer extended paid parental leave. Surely that's a benefit in kind too? Why can't parents (who've made a lifestyle choice) save up annual leave or take unpaid leave?

[scottishdiem]

Its an interesting policy to be sure. Cant have kids - tough shit, you are now paid less.

[PassTheCremeEggs]

What's the difference between this and a return to work bonus after maternity leave? (Other than that being a one off payment). Surely that's extra money for doing the same job that's available only to parents?

Plus maternity leave while we're at it? I got paid 6 months full pay on maternity leave. 6 months of pay for work I wasn't doing. That was my employer choosing to significantly top up the statutory pay, to attract skilled women and then, crucially, to retain them (got a return to work bonus of an extra month's pay when I came back). I don't really see how this is any different.

[happypoobum]

I agree Piglet My point was that you could also argue this was indirectly discriminatory as a disabled person might find it harder to cycle.

I live somewhere with very full employment so I think it started out as a way of attracting staff. Another large local employer used to pay half the interest on your mortgage up to £30k.

[Sophieelmer]

Then surely you lobby for a similar payment to care for disabled dependents or ask for the current scheme to be extended?

[NSEA]

@scottishdiem its not a punishment for those unable to have children. Its a perk for those who do

[Want2bSupermum]

purpledaisies Before I became a parent I knew childcare was expensive but I had no idea of just how expensive it really is. The costs quoted in the media are very low compared to what we pay for our DC. Honestly, I wish we could pay that little!

In the UK, for 3DC aged 5, 4 and almost 12 months, we would be paying about GBP2500 a month in childcare. That is GBP30k a year that needs to be paid after tax, so making about GBP50k a year means we are not paying for me to work. Yes you can always get an au pair but with a baby there is no way I would leave my baby with someone inexperienced. Here in the US we pay $3k a month, which is about GBP24k. It is still a lot but a lot of employers here pay parents more because they get it. A single person doesn't have overheads like a parent does and if you want the parent to be able to work, you need to pay a parent a lot lot more compared to a single person.

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

Yes but its the principle, no? If a company can pay cyclists extra then they can pay parents too! Suddenly it's all about the amount?

Then what about other groups. No it isn't just about the principle though. 3k is a huge amount of money for some. It would for example pay for my pay for my physio that I have to have to have twice every week.

[StealthPolarBear]

I'd argue it's indirect discrimination, for reasons others have listed
Also if both parents work there do they both get it? And when your child reaches 18 does it drop?
Sooo many questions

[m0therofdragons]

Just occurred to me that I got minimum mat pay but also a random payment of £350 per dc (well done for breeding payment?)

I can also take additional days leave for school events and sickness and mine is paid as employer says I go above and beyond. I guess it depends how much as to how unfair it is.

[Want2bSupermum]

For these people who think it is unfair, do you think it is fair that working parents are often earning less than minimum wage once you net their salary against childcare costs? How would you feel working for less than minimum wage while your single colleagues moan about how parents are giving preferential treatment?

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

Then surely you lobby for a similar payment to care for disabled dependents or ask for the current scheme to be extended?

Or you pay everyone the same. After all isn't that what the equality is all about or does that go out of the window then.

[sonyaya]

Good friends of mine and scrimping and saving for their second round of IVF. Nice to think they'd be paid less than those who have been lucky enough to become parents.

This policy is insulting on so many levels.