Leaving baby asleep with...

[0hCrepe]

There have been a few situations where I've had to wake the baby to pop out for something and it has felt like it would be so easy to leave her. For example I pick ds up from school occasionally after a club, could I leave her with dd (10 and very sensible). I'd be back 10 minutes later.
Can I leave her asleep while builders are working in a different room while I pop and buy milk to make them a brew?
I've never done it but WIBU to?

[doingmybestneverenough]

A baby can most certainly choke if alone in a cot/crib. All that would have to happen is for them to be sick and not be able to clear it. Safe sleeping guidelines are worth reading.

For those raising eyebrows re paedophiles. Would you leave your baby alone with an adult you dont know for 10 minutes? I wouldnt. Paedophiles look just like any other normal person. Thats how they get away with it!

[Natsku]

It's maybe like asking someone to watch the baby while she's asleep in a pushchair while I look at something upstairs in a big shop perhaps

I've done that. Wasn't a big shop really but there was a section that was up a few stairs and DD was fast asleep in her pram so didn't want to try bumping her up the stairs. Just put the pram by the till and asked the shop worker if it was ok. Then again I've left her outside shops too (live in Finland)

[Natstar98]

Wonder if the McCanns asked a similar question before going out to dinner....

[Looneytune253]

Would people really leave a newborn with a 10 year old? Im surprised at that tbh. I have often pondered if its worth getting my dad over to babysit when my 6 year old is asleep (never wakes) and my sensible 12 year old is up. If i have to pick my husband up from work (15mins ish). I have always decided no up to now. Very surprised at the 10yo/newborn though!!

[Oneandoneontheway]

Stop being so flipping judgemental folks !! She's not suggesting leaving the baby on her own and hasn't done so either,jeeze give the girl a break

[0hCrepe]

MummyTheGregor has it. Yes you're there, baby's asleep and you just want to nip out... just a thought and probably shouldn't have mused on here. I find the hysterical responses quite bizarre!
I don't think she's classed as a newborn anymore either (sob).

[zoemaguire]

"A baby can most certainly choke if alone in a cot/crib. All that would have to happen is for them to be sick and not be able to clear it. Safe sleeping guidelines are worth reading."

You haven't read them very carefully then, because babies are very good indeed at clearing spit or vomit from their mouths, even when lying on their backs. It's an automatic reflex and we'd be a bit stuffed as a species if it didn't exist. Also, there is no safe sleeping guideline that specifies being awake with your baby 100% of the time.

It's 10 minutes. With a responsible 10 year old.

I'm as paranoid as the best of you about my kids. The difference is that I try to keep the part of my brain that knows about statistics and risk vaguely in charge, most of the time, as far as I can. The total hysteria around infinitesimally tiny risks on mn is amazing, especially considering the much more risky activities we undertake every single day, like for instance driving a car with inadequately fitted car seats. Which apparently 80% of us do daily, with tragic consequences. So statistically, some of the people wittering about epidemics of paedophile builders on this thread will then go out a few hours later and drive their car at 70 miles an hour with an inadequately secured child in the back seat. In similar vein, how many of you use backward facing car seats for your toddlers, given the extremely well documented risks of forward-facing seats for young children? Oh wait, no, that is just hysteria by paranoid muesli-eating freaks wanting to make everybody else feel bad. You couldn't make it up, honestly.

[Mrscog]

A 5 month old is definitely not a newborn!!!

I agree with everything zoemaguire says.

I think a sensible, well briefed 10 year old watching a baby who is extremely likely to just stay sleeping for 10 minutes is a perfectly reasonable decision to make.

[arethereanyleftatall]

Great points Zoe, both posts, well said.

[0hCrepe]

Yes Zoe. In fact I need to inform myself better about car seats too.
And I love muesli.
I sometimes imagine people speaking with such panic as they do on here to an idea or comment, it would be quite hilarious.

[Mu123]

My dh is a tradesman, been pondering over this thread and I think he wouldnt bat an eyelid if one of his clients said baby was in bed and they were nipping out for milk etc. Hes a bit of a people pleaser though

[0hCrepe]

In a real life conversation I mean.

[Natsku]

Absolutely agree Zoe Even just going in the car without considering whether car seats are adequate or not, is much more dangerous than leaving a baby with a responsible 10 year old for 10 minutes, hell more dangerous than leaving a baby alone.

[Sixisthemagicnumber]

I take car seat safety very seriously zoe and insist on ERF.

[doingmybestneverenough]

Natstar98

Exactly.

[Sixisthemagicnumber]

Everyone seems to be focusing on choking and it being not preventable and not likely regardless of whether an adult is there.
Chocking is just one example.
What if a child dies from SIDS. A Sids death is probably not preventable regardless of who is present in the house but I wouldn't want it to happen whilst a 10 year old is in sole charge. It's not about being able to prevent everything, but it is about the emotional impact on a 10 year old that something happened whilst they were in charge.
My view is obviously in the minority but it does stem from my time as a student social worker when I was faced with a home alone situation and a 10 year old in charge of a much younger child. My supervisor called the police.

[Crunchymum]

I misread it as you leave DD with baby you get DS from school..... not from school clubs.

As you were

[MrsBobDylan]

As someone who's mum did this sort of thing all through my childhood, it's a no from me. My eldest sibling and I got left with little ones and lots happened in the time my mum was out, some of it OK, some not so OK. Put it this way, we didn't like it and sure as shit don't respect her for it.

[SolomanDaisy]

If it makes you feel any better OP , I don't live in the UK and people here regularly do the school run using a baby monitor app to keep an eye on their baby. This thread would make people laugh. And both Dutch mothers and Dutch children are amongst the happiest in the world.

[zoemaguire]

The chances of a baby dying from SIDS in any given 10 minutes is INFINITESIMALLY tiny. If you ruled your life based on such absurdly unlikely eventualities, you'd never leave the house. (Except that you wouldn't want to stay in the house either - do you know how many accidents happen in the home?!) Your perspective on risk is crazily, ridiculously out of kilter.

[ljfarminer]

I know it seems tempting if you're only gonna be gone 10 minutes. But I just wouldn't do it, sorry xx

[angelinheaven]

My dd started having seizures, I was with her at the time and it was so scary and she's my 5th dc. I certainly wouldn't put all of that on a young child of 10, one minute a baby can be fine and happy and the next it can be life threatening. So from my experience certainly a no. I worry about every little thing though, so probably not good.

[Sixisthemagicnumber]

I bet the McCans concluded the risk of anything happening when they were in view of the apartment and the children were asleep was extremely tiny too zoe yet they are without their daughter today. Why take an easily avoidable risk regardless of how tiny it is?

[Sixisthemagicnumber]

And the risk of Social services involvement should they become aware that a parent leaves a 10 year old in sole charge of a baby whilst they go out of the house is probably the highest risk of all and why would you risk that?

[Trainspotting1984]

To the people saying it's unfair to put the builders in that position- they're not going to do anything are they? They'll just get on with their work, not down tools and sit round In a circle doing wind the bobbin up