Was I being unreasonable to ask this woman to stop making 'aww' noises?

[unflinchingasaphotograph]

I think I might have just been quite rude, so do tell me if you think I was and I will apologise to her.

She was asking me questions - are you married, do you have kids and so on, and I was responding in the negative. She then kept saying 'awwwww' sympathetically, with a head tilt. I said in the end politely but a bit tersely 'please don't do that!'

Was I? I feel bad now!

I have one of these at work, or at least used to. Endless personal questions. One day we were talking about kids (I don't have any), and she asked me if I wasn't sad not to have any? So I replied, 'Yes, it is one of the great sorrows of my life. I couldn't have any.' Clue awkward silence. Serves her right.

I don't think the OP was 'very rude'.
Unless its rude to call time on an intrusive conversation.
Are we still not allowed to do that?

Oh no poor you she lost the art to make conversation. I swear when women have kids their brains turn to baby powder. Me included. That must have been an interesting conversation to have on her part. I wonder what she got from it.

Ahh. You had me at head tilt.i get the head tilt and I don't know how you do it
So her yelping awwww as punction sounds intolerable

You weren't rude OP! I'd have said something similar!

Oh god. She sounds very annoying. Don't blame you.

This reminds me of my MIL. In any conversation about someone who has just had a baby, MIL has to bring up DD1's labour. She does lots of head tilting, awww-ing, bangs on about how i had it the absolute worst (induction that turned into EMCS) and how horrible and traumatic it was.

Not sure what I've done to give this impression. Yes it was induction then EMCS but the section was more 'induction isn't working we need to get baby out because Apocalypse is shit at dilating' rather than 'blue lights, mother and baby in imminent and mortal danger'.
Also the induction bit while painful was quite fun actually. Had DH and my best friend there. Midwife was lovely and we had lots of nice chats, did a pub quiz, read magazines.

But MIL is determined to tell me and everyone else how horrible it was. She pities me for it and encourages others to do so.

Does my head in.

For info MIL is otherwise v nice.!

I don't think you were at all rude. Why would you need pity or empathy or anything In that vein.

I think the issue is more hers, in that being married is what defines her.

what an annoying cow

next time id say -why the hell would i want to be married

dead seriously

If you were rude, she was ruder!

Polite but terse sounds spot on.

^When I'm asked that, I just say "god no" as if the thought fills me with horror.
Works a treat.^

This is brilliant, finnmcool, and I will be filing it away to use in the future myself.

I would actually love to be married with children, but

In fairness, she was pretty young. Not a teenager but 24 maybe?

I thought she was mid 30s?

She was my age - mid/late thirties. Northern. Like me.

then later

In fairness, she was pretty young. Not a teenager but 24 maybe?

Asylum

Ahhhh manu I thought she was, but I've since been stalking her on Facebook found evidence to the contrary.

Astonished at posters who say the OP was rude. She said "please" in case you hadn't noticed.

A load of personal questions and a patronising reaction. Well done, unflinching.

It might just be a habit she has.

Oh and the 'tinkly little laugh' is worse

Please as a prefix doesn't exonerateone when dpbeing rude or intrusuve
please may I ask are you fertile,trying to get up the nelly,getting married?

awwwwww

YANBU. It will teach her not to ask strangers such personal questions next time. When two women at work kept pestering me about why I only have one DC and going on about how I needed to have more. I finally snapped that I can't have anymore kids. They both recoiled but the stupid and hurtful questions stopped after that and I doubt they'll hassle anymore women now.

A work colleague recently asked me if I'd lost weight, to which I replied no. She then said "awwwwwwwwww, never mind, maybe you will, in time for summer." I responded very rudely that I was quite happy with my body, thanks very much and have no intention of losing any weight in time for summer or any other bloody season!
She retreated looking very hurt and said she was only trying to be nice.
Fat-shaming cow and I'm not even very overweight.

So yeah, OP, I feel your pain, being pitied is annoying.

Please as a prefix doesn't exonerateone when dpbeing rude or intrusuve
please may I ask are you fertile,trying to get up the nelly,getting married?

if you're referring to my post, it was the OP who said please to fend off intrusive questions, so was not being rude.

Actually OP was very rude - what happened to just ignoring people, some people make 'sympathetic' noises to show they are listening