Was I being unreasonable to ask this woman to stop making 'aww' noises?

[unflinchingasaphotograph]

I think I might have just been quite rude, so do tell me if you think I was and I will apologise to her.

She was asking me questions - are you married, do you have kids and so on, and I was responding in the negative. She then kept saying 'awwwww' sympathetically, with a head tilt. I said in the end politely but a bit tersely 'please don't do that!'

Was I? I feel bad now!

[HorridHenryrule]

We can agree to disagree.

[LiviaDrusillaAugusta]

I would think you were a pig for ignoring me

I would think you were a bit of a cheeky cunt if you spoke to me as the OP did, if I had no intention of actually causing offence.

[HorridHenryrule]

Isn't ignoring people just as rude especially when they are asking questions. I would think you were a pig for ignoring me. I think the op done the right thing by telling her how she felt. Why should people walk on egg shells.

[LiviaDrusillaAugusta]

Actually OP was very rude - what happened to just ignoring people, some people make 'sympathetic' noises to show they are listening

[echt]

Please as a prefix doesn't exonerateone when dpbeing rude or intrusuve
please may I ask are you fertile,trying to get up the nelly,getting married?

if you're referring to my post, it was the OP who said please to fend off intrusive questions, so was not being rude.

[Emmageddon]

A work colleague recently asked me if I'd lost weight, to which I replied no. She then said "awwwwwwwwww, never mind, maybe you will, in time for summer." I responded very rudely that I was quite happy with my body, thanks very much and have no intention of losing any weight in time for summer or any other bloody season!
She retreated looking very hurt and said she was only trying to be nice.
Fat-shaming cow and I'm not even very overweight.

So yeah, OP, I feel your pain, being pitied is annoying.

[Capricorn76]

YANBU. It will teach her not to ask strangers such personal questions next time. When two women at work kept pestering me about why I only have one DC and going on about how I needed to have more. I finally snapped that I can't have anymore kids. They both recoiled but the stupid and hurtful questions stopped after that and I doubt they'll hassle anymore women now.

[Lulukat]

awwwwww

[GimmeeMoore]

Please as a prefix doesn't exonerateone when dpbeing rude or intrusuve
please may I ask are you fertile,trying to get up the nelly,getting married?

[LiviaDrusillaAugusta]

It might just be a habit she has.

Oh and the 'tinkly little laugh' is worse

[echt]

Astonished at posters who say the OP was rude. She said "please" in case you hadn't noticed.

A load of personal questions and a patronising reaction. Well done, unflinching.

[unflinchingasaphotograph]

Ahhhh manu I thought she was, but I've since been stalking her on Facebook found evidence to the contrary.

[HappyFlappy]

Asylum

[Manumission]

She was my age - mid/late thirties. Northern. Like me.

then later

In fairness, she was pretty young. Not a teenager but 24 maybe?

[Manumission]

I thought she was mid 30s?

[unflinchingasaphotograph]

I would actually love to be married with children, but

In fairness, she was pretty young. Not a teenager but 24 maybe?

[ArcheryAnnie]

^When I'm asked that, I just say "god no" as if the thought fills me with horror.
Works a treat.^

This is brilliant, finnmcool, and I will be filing it away to use in the future myself.

[Manumission]

Polite but terse sounds spot on.

[PickAChew]

If you were rude, she was ruder!

[GabsAlot]

what an annoying cow

next time id say -why the hell would i want to be married

dead seriously

[Grilledaubergines]

I don't think you were at all rude. Why would you need pity or empathy or anything In that vein.

I think the issue is more hers, in that being married is what defines her.

[ApocalypseNowt]

Oh god. She sounds very annoying. Don't blame you.

This reminds me of my MIL. In any conversation about someone who has just had a baby, MIL has to bring up DD1's labour. She does lots of head tilting, awww-ing, bangs on about how i had it the absolute worst (induction that turned into EMCS) and how horrible and traumatic it was.

Not sure what I've done to give this impression. Yes it was induction then EMCS but the section was more 'induction isn't working we need to get baby out because Apocalypse is shit at dilating' rather than 'blue lights, mother and baby in imminent and mortal danger'.
Also the induction bit while painful was quite fun actually. Had DH and my best friend there. Midwife was lovely and we had lots of nice chats, did a pub quiz, read magazines.

But MIL is determined to tell me and everyone else how horrible it was. She pities me for it and encourages others to do so.

Does my head in.

For info MIL is otherwise v nice.!

[ItsThatBeverleyMacca]

You weren't rude OP! I'd have said something similar!

[GimmeeMoore]

Ahh. You had me at head tilt.i get the head tilt and I don't know how you do it
So her yelping awwww as punction sounds intolerable

[HorridHenryrule]

Oh no poor you she lost the art to make conversation. I swear when women have kids their brains turn to baby powder. Me included. That must have been an interesting conversation to have on her part. I wonder what she got from it.