Strange babysitting request

[Maisy84]

My dh is currently away on business and my downstairs neighbours have asked me to babysit by having a monitor in my flat linked to their babies room in their flat (technically we're in the same house) as it's a big Georgian house divided into flats. I just don't feel it's safe for a number of reasons, firstly if there was a fire or smoke or a quiet intruder downstairs how would I know? Secondly if their son does wake up (they assure me he won't) I'd have to go downstairs and leave my child unattended - he's six years old and would be in bed but quite often wakes up for the toilet or bad dreams - and then what if I locked myself out or something. I've said no but feel they are a bit shocked as it wouldn't really inconvenience me, I'm happy to babysit when my dh returns and I can be in the same flat as the baby! They are both very hipster and have made it clear they think I'm being over-anxious, am I!??

[expatinscotland]

NFW

[Maisy84]

We're in London and I know the chances of something happening are remote, but just doesn't feel right to agree to look after a baby I wouldn't be able to physically check without leaving my child unattended - although I must admit I do put the bins out when he's in bed!

[Riv]

One name - Madeline McCann. Her parents were right outside the villa.

[Blondeshavemorefun]

I wihid have said no for the reasons you said but offered to have in my flat

tho seems they have found a willing mad person to do it

[Slimmingsnake]

No

[MumUndone]

Isn't it just the same as being upstairs in a house whilst the baby's downstairs?

[QuinionsRainbow]

Assuming they have a smoke alarm you'd hear if there was a fire. And you'd hear an intruder too I would think.
But presumably, IF there was a fire, the last thing you would want to do would be to go into another part of the building, which might well be smoke-filled, looking for someone else's child - you'd want to grab your own child and get out smartish. OP, YANBU.

[Blondeshavemorefun]

NO as diff homes. Front doors and possible diff electrical so one may have a power cut

It would be a case of out one front door. Down stairs then another front door

In a house you would be able to hear them and be there in seconds by running up stairs and not leaving one/own child alone in home while checking the other

[AliceInUnderpants]

Is this so they can go to the pub, or so they can pop to the corner shop for nappies and milk for the morning?

[BakeOffBiscuits]

No it's isn't the same as being in the same house MumUndone.

You don't have two locked doors, in the same house, between you and the baby.

[Trifleorbust]

This is very unsafe. Apart from anything else, they seem completely happy to alert people to the fact that there is an unattended baby in their flat

It is unlikely that anything bad is going to happen, but it is perfectly possible.

[TheElephantofSurprise]

OP, your decision and later offer were both spot on. It isn't acceptable/reasonable to 'babysit' from a different domicile, even if it is in the same building.

[Viviennemary]

That is most unwise of them. I'm sure this would be illegal. Report them.

[Chelazla]

I wouldn't look after a baby I could see! They really don't sound arsed!

[Maisy84]

It's for a night out, I would have to leave our flat (we have the main entrance at front of house) walk out into the front and round the side of the house to get into their front door which is at the side of the building. They were actually broken into a year ago from the back of the house and although the chances of the baby being kidnapped are minuscule to being non existent it just doesn't feel to me that I can commit to properly keeping him safe in that situation.

[user1471545174]

They sound like rubbish parents. YANBU at all.

[Thattimeofyearagain]

I wouldn't do this.

[kaputt]

I might do it if said neighbour and I were great friends and I was familiar with the layout of their flat and the child. ie if it was functionally the same as my own child asleep on a different floor of the house.

For a random neighbour fuck no! And more, I can't believe they'd ask you!

[kaputt]

You'd have to leave and walk round the side? even more fuck no. I was imagining you one flight of internal stairs up or down.

[Applesandpears23]

I wouldn't be happy with that at all. I wonder what social services would have to say? Is your upstairs neighbour a parent?

[Bobochic]

Why would you want that responsibility? Let them keep their problem!

[Knackered46]

God no! I'm the queen of slack parenting and I wouldn't do it!

[KayTee87]

I can't believe they would leave their baby in a flat by itself, terrible parenting. How well do they even know you or this other neighbour?
Yanbu at all!

[JenniferYellowHat1980]

I would be telling them they're irresponsible. I would want to report bit don't know if I'd have the balls.

[pringlecat]

I can kind of see where they're coming from, but presumably as the house is divided into flats, it's not as easy/quick to get from the room you're in to the room that their baby is in as it would have been before that conversion? And if you are in a different room, you need to be able to sprint there in a heartbeat if something goes wrong.

I can therefore understand why you would feel uncomfortable, even if you didn't have your own DC to look after and couldn't readily leave your flat and go to theirs.

If you're looking after children, you have to be in the same self-contained unit. I can just picture the worst case scenario of you dashing out from your flat to get to a crying baby elsewhere in the building and accidentally locking yourself out of both flats and getting horribly distressed.